Are you…are you…coming to this review?
Seriously, come to this review, 3.5 readers.
Normally, I would say that prequels are the lowest form of content. The proprietors of an IP have mined a profitable idea for all it was worth and years later, decide there’s one last nugget of gold to grab in the form of a backstory about the hero’s second-cousin’s uncle’s sister’s former room mate’s podiatrist’s nephew’s dog walker’s brother-in-law’s harrowing adventure through taxidermy school. Don’t believe me? See the Many Saints of Newark for more information. Did we need a prequel movie about Tony Soprano’s uncle? No. We needed at least 5 more seasons of Tony Freakin’ Soprano.
But House of the Dragon turned out to be way more awesome than the last few seasons of the original Game of Thrones and knock me over with a feather, because I found this tale set long before the days of Katniss Everdeen to be quite intriguing, though the critics seem to be giving it mixed reviews.
As it turns out, the elderly villain of the original flicks, Coriolanus Snow, played opposite Jennifer Lawrence by Donald Sutherland, wasn’t always such a dick cheeseburger with extra turd fries. In his youth, he strived to be a good man with idealistic goals. This is the story of how the world, as it so often does, takes a young person with dreams of doing good, chews them up, and spits out a total asshole. (SIDENOTE: Hollywood, I’ve got a great screenplay about how I once dreamed of doing great things only to be chewed up and spit out by the world and became the proprietor of a blog that’s only read by 3.5 readers, if you’re interested.)
Tom Blyth plays said young a-hole, I assume because he bears a striking resemblance to a young Donald Sutherland. He plays it well, with Young Snow being a student at university in the Capitol that trains mentors to guide Hunger Games tributes, because in this world, that’s totally a thing.
The Snows once had a great reputation, thanks to father and war hero Crassus Snow, but since his death in battle, they’ve fallen on hard times and Corio hopes to put the clan back on top once again by rising through the ranks of dystopian government. He sees his tribute, Lucy Grey (Rachel Zegler), a young woman from the famed District 12 (home to arrow slinging Katniss!) as his ticket to the big time. And given her ability to sing so sweetly that she can even charm venomous snakes into submission (literally), he might have a shot at moving up in the world.
But alas, we’re in the Hunger Games, and treachery ensues. Corio faces treachery from all sides, from classmates, to a conniving professor (Peter Dinklage) and must even cross beloved friends just to stay alive. Eventually, as oft happens to most aspiring politicians, he loses sight of the good he hoped to achieve, and his life just becomes all about kept his head above water in the sea of assholes he dove into on purpose.
This is the first performance I’ve seen by Rachel Zegler, she who has been panned greatly by Internet dweebs for claiming her turn in the upcoming reboot of Snow White would see Old Snowy as a strong, independent woman who doesn’t need dwarves or a prince and while I agree with the criticism about changing Snow White’s source material, I have to say I found her quite charming in this and disagree with the trolls who claim she’s literally worse than Hitler. Fun fact: to date, no one has ever literally been worse than Hitler. Some have come close, like Stalin and Pol Pot and Mao but no one has beaten Hitler yet in terms of evil and so I don’t think the girl who wants Snow White to be a bra burning feminist even lands in the same ball park or same series of ball parks or even the same time zone of ball parks as Hitler.
STATUS: Shelf-worthy.
Bookshelf Battle 