Hello 3.5 Readers.
I’m noted bloggery expert, Bookshelf Q. Battler.
Check this out:
Yes, that’s a quote from “Pop Culture Mysteries: Informant Zero.”
Jake crossed paths with a fiendish dominatrix. She asked him to become her slave, but Jake wasn’t interested, having experienced three previous Mrs. Hatchers already.
Through wattpad, I’m able to share a quote like that on Twitter, Facebook, or a variety of social media websites designed specifically for the purposes of making the populace slow, fat, lazy, dumb, oh and also so that we share all our information so the government can spy on us and read our minds.
I’m not saying you should be worried that the government is reading your mind, but hey, a little tin foil on your head couldn’t hurt either.
3.5 Readers: But BQB, how do I make one of those fancy quote graphics?
Thank you 3.5. I’m glad you ask. You want to make a graphic like this one?
I feel ya,’ Jake. Video Game Rack Fighter’s always after me about something. Dames. I tell you.
Or this one?
Oh Professor Fremont, you slay me with your wit!
It’s simple, here’s how:
- Log into Wattpad on your mobile device.
- Pick a word in your story and press your little finger down on it. It might take a second or so.
- The word or words will be highlighted. At each side of the highlighting, you’ll see a blue dot. Drag the left blue dot all the way to the beginning of the quote. Drag the right blue dot to the end of the quote.
- When you’re done, you’ll see a little box that says “comment.” You can select that to comment on the quote if you want.
- But we want to actually share that quote, so click on the little quotation mark. It looks like ” I hope I didn’t actually have to tell you that. I worry about your chances in the writing game if I had to.
- A photo with the background you provided for the story with the quote superimposed over it will appear.
- You’ll then have the opportunity to share it on your favorite time wasting social media surface.
- Congratulations! You’ve managed to cram one more piece of media down America’s already bloated entertainment hole!
This has been your noble blog host, Bookshelf Q. Battler, a poindexter of world renown.
Join us next week when we’ll discuss how to glue your quotes onto rowdy chinchillas and release them into the world to spread news of your brilliance.
Attorney Donnelly just reminded me to point out that was just a joke. Please do not glue your quotes onto chinchillas or any other animals. They cannot be trusted.
Don’t forget, you can follow me, BQB on Wattpad or on Twitter with the same handle – @bookshelfbattle
Oh Jake, you are a cut up! You’ll have 30.5 million readers in no time!