Hey 3.5 Readers,
Sooo….I don’t want to count my chickens before they’re hatched or anything but I was pleased to see that How the West Was Zombed was ranked #165 in Wattpad Horror as of Saturday morning.
I’m not saying that I’m putting a down payment on my house in Malibu but…I probably should right?
Here it is listed in the “Hot” section of Wattpad Horror. I’m just going to say it. I always thought I’d have to set myself on fire in order to get someone to refer to me as “Hot.”
Seriously. I’ve been referred to as “lukewarm” and “mildly tepid” but “hot” is a new one for me.
Oh and for no reason, here is a picture of Bookshelf Q. Battledog:
This noble hound has defended BQB HQ from many zombies. Also, he has eaten 5,731 intruders alive.
People…so many Hollywood super models are missing out on partying with me. They don’t even know what they are missing out on.
Help them out and check out my story on Wattpad.
Look, I’m not some kind of Wattpad math scientist. But I assume your reads, clicks, votes, comments, etc. all factor in to pushing this fine, fine story up the charts, and moving me closer to my Malibu beach house where I will no doubt party with many, many super models.
3.5 READERS: But BQB what about Video Game Rack Fighter?
She is down with it provided she gets to party with male super models. Honestly, I’m probably just going to tell her I will invite male models to the party but then not actually do it.
Don’t tell her I said that. Only 3.5 people read this blog so the secret should be safe.
3.5 READERS: But BQB, you’re still a hideous nerd. No super model will want you.
Maybe, but you’d be surprised how far “Hey baby, I can put in a good word for you if you want to play an 1800’s zombie hooker in the movie based on my book that all began on WordPress and Wattpad” will go.
So please, 3.5 readers. Help a nerd out and I promise to party with so many super models in your honor.
That’s how much I care about my 3.5 readers.