I read an article that every Olympian at the Olympics in Brazil is being given 42 condoms to prevent the spread of the Zika virus.
I have many questions.
- 42? Really? Look I get it. You’re all young and in good shape. You all have a certain amount of fame, some more than others given what sport you’re in. But holy shit. Don’t you need to be spending some time practicing your shot puts and javelin throws and thirty meter dashes and all that shit?
- Who decided 42? Why not 40? Who thought of 40 and then was like “Well, better throw in two more!”
- Why not 25? I mean really, if you’re getting that much you must have some things going for you and at that point you must be able to afford your own condoms.
- Is this where we’re at now? AIDS isn’t enough to worry about? Now we have to worry about a disease passed by a mosquito bite and then it can be passed further when people dance the horizontal mambo? Crap. Holy Crap. It’s like there is a grand conspiracy to keep people from doing it. I blame the mosquito lobby. Big mosquito most be stopped.
Bookshelf Battle 
I always thought athletes were supposed to refrain from, you know, when competing…
I made terrible life choices I guess
Six weeks x seven days per week, maybe? Or you know… life, the universe and everything?
Perhaps there are things that you are not supposed to enjoy in Rio but which you can trade for on the black market with condoms.
Me, I would stay so far away from the sewer that is the Olympic venue, aspirations be damned, that I might end up inventing a 25th time zone.