#10 – You have to or you’ll die. Who wants “death by fart” in their obituary ?
#9 – It’s fun.
#8 – Someone has to.
#7 – The right fart can rip a hole in the space-time continuum.
#6 – You can blame it on your dog.
#5 – It’d be weird if you didn’t.
#4 – With enough practice you can fart show tunes.
#3 – You’ll explode if you hold your farts in.
#2 – No one has never not farted.
#1 – Even the Queen ofEngland farts.
Bookshelf Battle 
The queen of England does not fart! Suggesting such a thing could get you in a lot of trouble.
The corgis ratted her out.
Treason!
And, you forgot about ‘basking in the ambience’ 😀
Are you British? I’ve offended my Brit readers
Yeah. British. And not offended.