King of the Monsters? More like King of the Stinkers, am I right?
BQB here with a review of this turkey.
So, ever since the success of the Avengers, all the other studios want in on the “cinematic universe” idea, though ironically, with all the money and talent that Tinsel Town has to offer, no one but Disney/Marvel has yet to do it effectively.
Still, they try. This film is set in the world of the 2014 “Godzilla” and 2017’s “Kong: Skull Island.”
Now, I actually liked the latest Kong movie. It had a decent story. A Vietnam War Colonel, angry that his country did him wrong, sees the fight against Kong as a way to achieve the victory his incompetent leaders denied him. Add in a subplot about a WWII soldier who got lost on the island and the Monarch Initiative and it wasn’t a total waste of time. It wasn’t my favorite movie but if I happen to be flipping channels and need something to watch in the background while doing other things when I come across it then sure, I’ll leave it on. It was fun.
The problem is this Godzilla film suffers the fate of all Godzilla films. Namely, they are all the same. You get occasional awesome fight scenes where the big lizard fights other big monsters intermixed between long, drawn out scenes where scientists bicker about man’s audacity in thinking he control nature, his pollution and destruction of the earth, whether or not Godzilla is a villain or hero, and so on.
Here, the scientists take opposite viewpoints, that Godzilla may be looking to kill us all or maybe the destruction he does is to an end, namely, though he does take out entire cities, he only does so while fighting monsters who would take out the whole world. He has to bitch slap these monsters to get them to behave and unfortunately, that means a lot of death, destruction and property damage but hey, it would be worse if these monsters weren’t bitch slapped and he’s got to bitch slap them.
The plot centers around a husband/wife scientist team who are at odds over the beast. Vera Farmiga thinks titans, or any large monster, are earth’s response to a sickness. Just as a fever helps burn off illness, so to do monsters smash the shit out of humanity and once our cities are destroyed, pollution is reduced and the world is saved.
In her quest to let the titans rule, she is joined by a British soldier turned eco-terrorist played by legendary baddie Charles Dance of Tywin Lannister fame, who is too good for this drek and no doubt is just collecting a paycheck.
Vera’s husband, played by Kyle Chandler, thinks this idea is stupid and humanity should be saved and the titans destroyed. And so it goes. Scientists bitch and moan and wax philosophical for long stretches of time and then once in awhile you are treated to a cool monster fight. They could actually just cut the talking, show you 20 minutes of monster fights and call it a day and everyone would be happy.
Also, Millie Bobby Brown, as the couple’s child, has to overcome her fighting parents to save the day.
STATUS: Borderline shelf-worthy. I think Godzilla movies are just born to suffer the same fate. Many years ago, when the film industry was new, some Japanese dudes figured out that if a guy gets in a rubber lizard suit and stomps on a model of a city, it looks cool. It was awesome for its time but unfortunately for Godzilla, its not something that impresses us in today’s CGI laden landscape. Maybe one day Hollywood will come up with the plot that will make us want another Godzilla movie, but they haven’t done it yet.
Although, there seems to be talk of an upcoming sequel, “Godzilla vs. King Kong” so…maybe….
Bookshelf Battle 