Why Dexter Needs a Killer Wife

Hey 3.5 Dark Passengers.


One more thought from my binge-watch.

We men want killer wives. Killer bods. Killer personality. Killer skills…but I’m not talking about us. I’m talking about Dexter.

I still think the show should have kept Rita alive longer. Though her death made for great shock value, Dexter having a family to lose if he screwed up his kills made for good TV watching.

But since she died, one thing the show flirted with but never committed to was the idea of Dexter having a girlfriend/wife who would join him in the killing.

We first saw this in season 2 with Lilah, who was an arsonist, crazy and really digged Dexter’s killing. Alas, she was also super crazy and wanted to kill everyone Dexter loved because she was that jealous (sigh no woman has ever gotten that jealous over me…yet!) whereas Dexter only wanted to kill bad people.

We saw it front and center in season 5 when Lumen (Julia Stiles) escaped from a gang of violent pervert sex fiends who kidnapped and raped women then killed them and stuffed them into barrels and dumped them in a swamp. (Not G rated family viewing!)

Lumen and Dexter had a brief romance over the fact that they had both been the victims of heinous crimes which turned them into killers, albeit those who kill for justice. Alas, once Lumen killed her last attacker, she felt the need to kill subside and thus could not be with Dexter because she could no longer support his killing.

Finally, the series gave us Hannah McKay (Yyvone Strahowski? Am I spelling that right?). She too was struck with the desire to kill, but she only killed bad people too. Sounds like a match made in heaven er hell er purgatory?

When this romance started, I thought maybe the show was going in an interesting direction where Dexter and Hannah would marry and become a suburban dwelling duo of husband/wife murderers who schedule their kills in between taking the kids to little league.

One of the show’s tropes, i.e. that Dex’s wife Rita, or other friends and fam, constantly dump on him for being so “busy” and going out at all hours of the night. It’s understandable. If someone in your life was constantly out at all hours, you’d wonder what they’re doing. However, it got kind of old. I started to agree with Ghost Harry i.e. Dexter you’re out so much that you literally can’t have a family and be a serial killer. Being a horrible murderer is just too time consuming.

Giving Dexter a killer wife who was in on the dismemberment and bloodshed would have revitalized the show and given it a new edge. Finally, Dexter could have had it all – being able to kill while having a wife who understands the need and why he’s out all the time and even joins in.

So in conclusion, if anyone from Showtime reads this fine blog, I hope you’ll give Dexter a murderous, killer wife and see how it goes. Thank you.

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