Category Archives: state of the bookshelf

State of the Bookshelf – BQB’s Production Schedule

Hey 3.5 readers.

So, I’ve developed a bad habit.  Whenever I feel down, I commission a book cover.

It’s ok.  I’m gone to be done at three for awhile.

The other day I went back, looked at Zomcation, and realized that yeah, it’s pretty funny.  It’s also 50,000 words I rattled off in a month, leaving me to realize if the plot takes place in the present, there isn’t much to research, and it’s just a goofy project, the words come faster.

So I turned the 99 Design artists loose again.  Here’s my latest poll, please vote.

Here’s where my mind is:

THIS YEAR – Finish and publish BQB’s Writing Prompts, Zom Fu and Zomcation.

NEXT YEAR – Finish and publish three of my Zombie Western Books.

YEAR THREE – Depends how the books are doing but I would like to work on some of my mysteries.  We’ll see if anyone is clamoring for sequels.

At any rate, I’m not going to start anything that hasn’t already been started.  Whatever has started so far will be finished before a new idea is worked on and this is difficult because, believe me, I have so many ideas.

It’s time I’m getting short on.  It’s do or die time and I need to start churning out books if I’m ever going to have some time to enjoy being a self-publisher.

Plus, I need to throw my NWA style pool party.  Also, I have to save the world with my writing in order to stave off the Mighty Potentate’s invasion.

Thank you for listening, 3.5 readers.  Let me know if you have any advice or if you think any of my half written works deserves to be moved up in the production schedule.

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State of the Bookshelf – 12/8/16

Hey 3.5 readers.

Time for a State of the Bookshelf address.

First, check out the 3D cover of my upcoming book:


You know 3.5, I have to say it.  This book cover is a small victory for me.

Maybe one day I’ll share my trials and tribulations but suffice to say, I’ve been through some shit.  I’m ambitious.  I try hard.  I work hard.  Yet inevitably, for as long as I can remember, I always end up landing flat on my face.

Life has always been like Lucy holding that football.  There have been many times where I, in a Charlie Brown-like manner, would assume I was about to make it (i.e. kick that football) only to have life (or Lucy) take the football away leaving me (just like Charlie) flat on my ass.

I wonder if Charles Schultz ever realized how he captured a brilliant metaphor to explain how people can only try and fail so many times before they give up.  Maybe that’s why Charlie is so lovable.  He kept trying to kick that football even though defeat was certain.

I often wonder why I don’t give up, why I keep Charlie Brown-ing it.  But lately, I think I’m Langston Hughes-ing it:

Dreams – Langston Hughes

Hold fast to dreams
For if dreams die
Life is a broken-winged bird
That cannot fly.

Hold fast to dreams
For when dreams go
Life is a barren field
Frozen with snow.

Yeah, there are many more practical things I could be doing than blogging and writing, especially when my many attempts at kicking life’s football have left me shouting, “Uggh!” before rolling over and over again through the air then landing on my butt.

Yet, what’s the alternative?  I’ve got to hold onto the dream because Langston is right.  Without dreams, life is a field of barren snow.

So I must keep giving Lucy the chance to pull that football away to avoid a snowy life, if that makes any sense.

All this is a very longwinded way of saying that I don’t feel like the football was pulled away from me in this respect.  I got off my butt, I did something, I set up a design contest, I talked to some designers and I got a pretty sweet cover.

I started out a pessimist.  I thought it wouldn’t work out.  But it did.  Lucy let my toe briefly tap the ball and that’s a step in the right direction.

3.5 readers, I hate to set an arbitrary date but I really need you all to become 3.5 million readers by 2020.  That’s more or less the last year where I could conceivably use my prospective book writing moolah to throw a wild, lavish party ala that party scene in the NWA biopic Straight Outta Compton.

Yeah.  I know.  That’s a lot of pressure to put on myself.  I’m not sure people could get excited enough about books to support an NWA style party in the name of books.  (You have to see the party scene in that movie to know what I’m talking about).

But at any rate, that’s my gauge for success.  Malibu mansion to throw NWA style party in to celebrate my writing career by 2020.  If it happens in 2021, that’ll be too late.  The millions coming in 2022 or 2023 won’t matter.  Give me millions in 2025 and I’ll just smile and nod and then donate it to charity or some shit because by then I will have lost my ability to care.

Malibu NWA style party to celebrate my book career by 2020 or bust!  And you all 3.5 of you are invited.

Hey, by the way, before I go back to yeti captivity, you nerds have put me over 2000 followers.

Thanks for listening, 3.5.  The state of the bookshelf is strong.


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State of the Bookshelf -Taking a Poll

Happy Monday 3.5 readers.

Your old pal BQB here.

Out of all of my half-written started then stopped stories, which one would you like to see me work on again the most?

I’m feeling a little lost so I’d like your input.


State of the Bookshelf – BQB’s Plans for the Fall


BQB is beloved by his 3.5 readers – like this guy. Also, Aunt Gertie and 1 and 1/2 of a person in Albuquerque.

Happy Fall, 3.5 readers.

So here’s where my mind is at.

I’m going to use this Fall to:

A) Get super buff.  Gotta get my exercise on. Get my eating right on. Drop a few lbs to improve my health so I can live long enough to entertain my 3.5 readers far into the future. Plus, Video Game Rack Fighter keeps her shit hella tight so its only fair I reciprocate before she drops me like a hot potato for a studlier nerd.

B) Write a new novel, “The Illiad Rebooted.” That’s right. Alien Jones has resurrected Ancient Greek Poet Homer and together we are going to reboot the shit out of the Illiad for fun and profit.  Mostly profit.  Actually, mostly fun. I can’t imagine there will be much profit.

I’m going to bang out this draft by Dec. 31, spend the first few months of next year getting it rewritten, edited, and self-published, then devote the rest of next year to rewriting, editing and self-publishing How the West Was Zombed.

This may be a dumb idea but I’m getting restless and feel the need to move on to something and then I’ll be able to come back to Zombed with a fresh mind.

I worry as this has been my downfall in the past  – I start novels, then go on to other novels, but I think it will be ok because I’m more determined than ever to get a novel out.

This is all subject to change of course but as of today, this is where I am.

I like to fantasize about renting my own office, starting my own profitable self-publishing business, earning boku cash and most importantly, laughing heartily at friends, family, and assorted dummies who told me I’d never amount to anything and have thus far proven themselves to be psychic.

“No, dummies!” I will say. “You were not psychic. You just did not look far ahead enough into the future – a future where I have purchased a mansion in Malibu with my self-publishing money and have wild hot babe infested parties every weekend.”

It is important to remain humble and to keep your dreams realistic, 3.5 readers. It really is.

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State of the Bookshelf Address – 4/27/16


This was going to be the year that I was going to get a book self-published.

Now it is almost May and I don’t see that happening.

I’m 65,000 words into How the West Was Zombed.  That’s a new record.  And I can surely get that first draft done this year…but now my gut says in for a penny, in for a pound, I might as well write my next two sequel ideas and then edit and package them and put them all out together.

That could take like, another year.  Crap.

I’ll have to see where I’m at when I’m done with Zombed.  Perhaps I could rewrite it, edit it and publish it and then if people seem to like it, I can write the sequel.

Yet, my gut still tells me to write all three at once.

My gut also tells me I might waste a lot of time on an idea no one likes.

My gut is such a two-faced bitch.

There are a lot of things I am pleased with myself when it comes to Zombed.

Gunther and his sassy old-timer wisdom.

Doc the know it all and his mission to educate the world on the curative properties of cocaine (because, you know, he is an 1800’s doctor after all.)

The love affair between Doc and Annabelle surprised me…Anabelle was meant to be a throwaway character without much development and now I find myself more enthralled with Doc and Annabelle’s romance than the love triangle between Slade, Miss Bonnie and the Widow Farquhar.

Sigh.  Zombed was meant to be a stand alone.  A quickie to give me the experience of getting a self published book under my belt by the end of the year.  An experiment in figuring out what can go right and wrong in self publishing.

But now that it is May and the draft isn’t done yet I feel like I blew it.

Yet, I also feel like I’m at a “it will be done” rather than “will it be done?” phase, which is new for me.

When Zombed is done, I think I will turn my attention towards:

A) Writing the Zombed sequel.

B) Writing a stand-alone book.  And I MEAN STANDALONE.  A book with a beginning, middle and an end, a plot worth it enough to keep turning the pages but not so complicated that I have to sit down with a flow chart and a slide rule the way I’ve been doing with Zombed lately.

And basically what I will do is work on Zombed sequel, then when I get stuck about what happens next, work on the other standalone.

And I’ll share it all on the blog for your comments…and I’ll probably work less on all the funny lists etc. to make more time for novel writing.

I’m not sure what the standalone will be about….ironically, it may be a comedy in modern times about one family’s efforts to deal and come to terms with each other’s bullshit…during a zombie apocalypse.

Sigh.  I never set out to be a zombie guy though.  But in my mind the story has a clear beginning, middle and end and no bizarrely complicated plot about a vampire corporation mucking things up.

This has been hard.  I have so many ideas.  And my ideas are like my babies and when I can’t get them all written it is like I’m abandoning my babies.

At the same time, I do intend to some day move forward with Pop Culture Mysteries.  That film noir private detective style is just so, so much fun for me.

I’ll get to Jake’s hi jinx some day, I guess.

And there are ideas I’ve yet to even share.  There’s one so utterly complicated and befuddling I’m not even sure I’m a good enough writer to write it yet but I hope to get there some day.

Anyway, thanks 3.5 readers.  Stats have been breaking 100 the past two days, the search engines are bringing in like 50 hits a day on their own the past week or so.

This is one of few pursuits I’ve stuck with in life because of the ever improving results.

I mean, the results aren’t that great, I only have 3.5 readers…but in 2014 I only had 1.5 readers.

30.5 readers by 2020, baby.

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