I’m just going to say it.
Donald Duck is the best and Mickey Mouse sucks the big one.
Honestly. Who can be happy all the time?
Look, I’m not saying this is the case but whenever I don’t see that bad ass duck walking around I feel like it’s an anti-duck conspiracy.
Mickey is all about goodness and wholesomeness.
Donald just bitches and loans all the time.
Stick Mickey in the worst situation and he’ll smile.
Put Donald in the happiest of situations and he’ll find something to quack about.
Mickey is like that unattatanable goal of perfection.
Donald is a working class duck who is helpless to solve all his problems so like the rest of us, he just squawks out in a furious, impotent rage whenever he’s had enough.
And so I worry. Is that where society is headed? Everyone be happy and oust all the contrarians?
And you know, as much as he quacks in fury, Donald is a stand up duck.
Who knows what happened to Huey, Dewey and Louie’s duck parents?
Are they the duck spawn of Donald’s drug addled duck brother or duck sister? Are they deadbeat duck parents?
Who knows? All I know is that when those boys needed a duck father figure, Donald took them in and raised them as his own.
Yes, I’ve put a lot of thought into this and I have decided that Donald rules and Mickey is crying on the inside.
Bookshelf Battle 