Tag Archives: movie

Movie Review – The Boy Next Door (2015)

Oh J Lo.  How the mighty have fallen.

January is garbage movie month.  It’s not the summertime where people are on vacation and have time to go to a movie.  It isn’t Christmas time when families feel the need to get together and watch a movie in the spirit of togetherness, camaraderie, and all that nonsense.

Alas, January is the time when half the country is freezing their butts off and everyone is plugging away on New Year’s resolutions which will be tossed aside by March.

So naturally, I went into The Boy Next Door assuming I was walking into a pile of red hot smelly garbage.  To give it a backhanded compliment, it was only hot and smelly garbage, with the “red” adjective being unnecessary.  In other words, it was bad, but not as bad as I thought it would be, and not the worst movie I’ve seen…so I guess as January movies go, good job J Lo?

So, let’s get to the disturbing premise.  J Lo is estranged from her husband, Garrett, played by John Corbett. As they quickly show you in a massive detail dump of a beginning scene at the start of the movie, he cheated on J Lo with his secretary, thus introducing J Lo to a new low in her career, that of playing a woman who could possibly be cheated on.  (Listen, I still don’t buy it, if you have J Lo and you cheat on her, you’re just a greedy bastard, even if we are talking about middle-aged J Lo).

Twenty-year old Noah, played by Ryan Guzman, moves in next door, on the premise that he’s there to help an ailing Uncle, but as we learn later, Noah killed his parents, because,  I don’t know, he’s nuts I guess.  J Lo’s character, Claire (yes J Lo is old enough to play someone named Claire)  helps the young lad cook a meal and in a moment of weakness, she succumbs to his advances.

The whole idea is creepy and weird, and the writers make sure to stress that Noah is 20 years old, I assume in an attempt to make it less creepy and weird.  And while I’m not sure how old J Lo is, she has to be in her forties and the idea of her playing a character who gets with someone who probably wasn’t even born yet when she was a fly girl on In Living Color just seems like an odd choice for her acting to career to go in.

After all, I miss the J Lo who was a maid that won Matthew McConaughey’s heart in Maid in Manhattan or the J Lo who trained to kick her killer stalker husband’s ass in Enough.  Meanwhile, this movie was basically Enough meets The Graduate.

So, needless to say, Claire tries to break things off with Noah, but as previously mentioned, he’s nuts, and he’s not having any of it.  He stalks Claire, threatens her, harasses her.  The stakes are high because Claire is a teacher and Noah is attending Claire’s high school.  And while the writers, again, make it clear that Noah is 20, the situation would still cost Claire her job, standing in the community, any attempts to reconcile with her cheating husband who is trying to make amends for what he did, and so on.

Sigh.  I like J Lo.  And this isn’t the worst movie she’s made.  That award goes to Gigli.  Still, even if he is 20, the whole idea of her playing a teacher who has an affair with a student…its just disturbing and might be an indictment of Hollywood’s treatment of older actors.

After all, J Lo’s kept herself up well and doesn’t look much different from her Maid in Manhattan days, at least in my opinion, anyway.  And while her acting skills will probably never earn her an academy award (she’s always been a better singer and dancer), surely Hollywood could find some better roles for her to play.

But alas, no.  No matter how beautiful you are, or how long your career has been, if you’re over 40, Hollywood demands you play a stalked mother with marital problems.

As you know, the Bookshelf Battler is a lover of classic literature, and there was brief mention of the fact that Claire was a classic literature teacher.  There are some very brief classic lit discussions (not too many, we wouldn’t want to provide any thought provoking discussions to a January movie).

On a bad blind date with a man who belittles Classic Literature, arguing that it is not a good subject to study for one who wants employment, Claire points out JK Rowling as an example of a Classic Lit Major who made it big.  And true to form, I sat there with my popcorn, yelling in my mind, “And what about all the other Classic Lit Majors who end up in the slush pile, J Lo?!”

Sigh.  I’m such a cliche.  Don’t mind me.  Keep majoring in Classic Lit people.

Oh, and then there’s a scene where Noah gives Claire “a first edition copy of Homer’s The Iliad.”  I don’t have the heart to point out that a first-edition copy of The Iliad probably would have been printed on papyrus or a stone tablet.

So, in conclusion, it’s a movie that a) made me feel bad for J Lo b) was bad and c) wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be and d) pretty much what you can expect from a January movie.

Come on, March!  We need your better movies to distract us from our broken resolutions!

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Movie Review – Science, Space Exploration and Interstellar (2014)

WARNING:  There are spoilers in this post that stretch the boundaries of space and time.  For every hour you spend reading this, you may actually be receiving seven years of spoilers!

THE BOOKSHELF FROM THE INTERSTELLAR MOVIE

As promised, I’m back with a review of the film Interstellar starring Matthew McConaughey and Anne Hathaway.  Here’s a fun anonomaly:  the other day I posted the text of “Do Not Go Gentle Into That Goodnight” by Dylan Thomas, a poem that features prominently in that film.

There’s a scene at the end that involves messages being sent through space in time via a bookshelf and well, because this blog’s name is “Bookshelf Battle” and I had a post about Interstellar, I saw a surge in web traffic from people googling things like “bookshelf and interstellar” or “what’s the deal with the bookshelf in interstellar?” or similar searches.  Totally coincidental.  I would never purposely try to move traffic to my site by mentioning “bookshelf” and “interstellar” a bunch of times on my site because honestly, what would be the point of going on all day about the bookshelf from the Interstellar movie?  Frankly, it would be ridiculous to keep going on and on about the bookshelf in the Interstellar and to mention the bookshelf from the Interstellar movie would just be a sad attempt to drive up web hits – so believe you me this will be the last time that I’ll mention the bookshelf from the Interstellar movie.

Bookshelf.  Bookshelf.  Bookshelf.  Interstellar.  Interstellar.  Interstellar.

A CONCEIVABLE FUTURE

I’ve noticed a trend in modern science fiction – namely, to introduce inventions that aren’t around today but to do so in a conceivable manner.  The science fiction of the past dreamed of a day with flying cars and people walking around in funny looking aluminum suits.  For some reason, people in the 1950’s thought that aluminum clothing would be very popular by now.

Interstellar presents technology that we don’t have yet, but said technology is relatable given the way it is presented.  For example, the film features robots with artificial intelligence, but they look like walking/talking ATM machines, not metallic humanoids ala Terminator.

Meanwhile, the ship used looks essentially like a larger version of the Space Shuttle rather than the U.S.S. Enterprise.

The premise of the film?  The Earth is on the way out.  Centuries of abuse and excess have withered the planet’s resources, caused widespread blight and famine, and ruined the economy.  McConaughey plays Cooper, a former engineer and NASA test pilot who only briefly dipped his toe into a space exploration career when the world went into a decline.  His community is relatively stable and he eeks out a living as a farmer, living with his two kids, Murph and Tom, and his father-in-law.  His wife died from an ailment that normally would have been treated in better times.

Cooper isn’t a big fan of the farm life – he regrets never having had the chance to explore space and laments that civilization collapsed before he could do so.  Cooper’s father-in-law, played by John Lithgow, is the yin to Cooper’s yang, lecturing him about how “the world is not enough for him” and how that kind of thinking led to the downfall of the human race – i.e. so many people on a planet with a limited supply of resources and each person is never happy with what they have – they always want more.

There’s probably a lesson for world leaders to think about when considering how to best protect and care for the environment.  Also, Cooper training for a career that he never got to have is certainly a problem that many of today’s college graduates can relate to.

A timeframe of when the movie takes place is not provided, though I got the impression it takes places at a time when today’s millenials have become the grandparents, so maybe 2050-2060 or so?  Just a guess.

 

THE SCIENCE OF SPACE EXPLORATION

Long story short, Dr. Brand, played by Michael Caine, recruits Cooper to use his underutilized pilot skills to go on a desperate mission – fly through a recently discovered wormhole and find a new, habitable planet for the human race.  The humans will probably be good to the new planet for a year or two then proceed to mine and drill the crap out of it all in the name of cheaper iPads and dollar discount Wal-Mart merchandise but that goes beyond the parameters of the film.

He teams up with Anne Hathaway, Dr. Brand’s daughter, who is, herself, another Dr. Brand.  Also, there are two miscellaneous astronauts whose names I neglected to learn because they buy the farm early in the film.

If  you’re a nerd such as myself, you’ve probably thought a lot about space travel.  Though we often think about space travel beyond the moon as being impossible, it isn’t so much impossible as it is improbable.  In a myriad of science fiction movies, Hollywood has portrayed two different ways.  Let’s discuss them along with why they are unlikely:

  • WARP SPEED – Han Solo punches a button and all the stars around the Millenium Falcon stretch out in lines as the ship he won in an intergalactic card game wizzes through them.  The problem?  It would be extremely difficult to drive a ship that fast and not crash into something – a star, an asteroid, a piece of space garbage, something.  The ship would need incredibly accurate sensoring mechanisms and an advanced auto pilot that could maneveur at high-speeds because humans have yet to manage getting out of the grocery store parking lot without bumping into something let alone get around obstacles at mind-bending speeds.

 

  • HYPERSLEEP – Ripley in Aliens preserves herself in a pod that keeps her body in the same physical shape over the course of a long, multi-year journey.  The ship goes on auto-pilot and drives at a normal pace while the occupants of the ship take a nice, long nap.  The characters in Interstellar actually utilize this technology in the film.  A machine that can actually preserve a body and prevent it from aging would be remarkable, and would have many medical applications in addition to the obvious use in space-exploration but until society figures out a way to not make people wait in an ER waiting room for six hours, there is probably not going to be any headway in such a device anytime soon.

Rather than focus on warp speed or hypersleep technologies, Interstellar takes a look at another means of space travel that has heretofore been unused by Hollywood – the wormhole.  As the film explains, scientists believe that worm holes have the possibly to bend points in space such that a tunnel can be created between them.  (At one point, a character draws a line between two points on a piece of paper, then bends the paper so that the two points meet to illustrate how a worm hole makes it possible to go from one point to another without travelling the long distance of the “straight line” in between.

All of this is theoretical but the movie’s allure is taking all of these highly theoretical concepts and imagining – what if someone actually managed to physically follow through with them?

I applaud the film’s producers for taking all of these hard-boiled, difficult to grasp concepts, typically the stuff that makes the average high school student’s eyes glaze over and fall asleep in science class, and portray them in a very real and tangible manner.

SPACE AND TIME

Also at issue in the film is the concept of differences in the passage of time – i.e. that it is possible for time to move differently at one point than it does at another.  Cooper struggles with making the ultimate sacrifice – namely, that while he is in space, his children are aging and may eventually even surpass him.  At one point, the crew reaches a planet and Cooper is faced with the difficult realization that for every hour he spends on the surface, seven years will pass on Earth.   True to form, at the start of a brief mission to a water logged planet, Murph is just a kid but after the mission, she’s all grown up and played by Jessica Chastain.  Talk about the cat being in the cradle.

INTERSTELLAR AND THE BOOKSHELF AT THE END

I said I wouldn’t mention Interstellar and the bookshelf at the end of the movie and well, I’m not going to, not only to not utilize a cheap method of driving up my web traffic but also because I haven’t decided if this was the film’s “jump the shark” moment or if it was highly creative and imaginative.  You watch.  You decide for yourself.

PARTING THOUGHTS

I’m a big supporter of space exploration but I am a lowly nerd with a book blog so really, my opinion doesn’t amount to a hill of beans.  For me, it was sad to see the Space Shuttle program scrapped in recent years and it boggles my mind that we are paying the Russians millions of dollars to launch our American astronauts into space, especially at a time when the Russians haven’t exactly been playing nice with their neighbors lately.

I think there’s a lot that could be learned from not only localized space exploration (i.e. around the Moon and just above Earth’s orbit) but also deep exploration – i.e. let’s go to Mars!  Hell, if we’re willing to spend the money and are able to find astronauts willing to make the ultimate sacrifice, a mission to fly for ten or twenty years out into space to report findings back to Earth is not impossible.  Improbable, yes but not impossible.

I do get it – the economy is terrible, people can’t find jobs, there are all kinds of wars and turmoil going on in the world and in light of all that it seems selfish to toy around with space.  But as Cooper points out in the film, space exploration technology also usually gives rise to technology that helps out everyday life on Earth, such as the MRI machine.  Perhaps there are discoveries to be made by exploration of planets within our own solar system that could improve the quality of our life.

Or, perhaps Stephen Hawking has a point, namely that maybe there is alien life out there, but maybe we don’t want to know them.  Maybe there are nice aliens who will share all their technology with us and make our lives better.  Or maybe they’ll invade our planet and make us their slaves.

Who knows?  All I know is the film filled me with a sense of wonder about all the possibilities that space exploration has to offer.  Brilliant and uplifting, there was only one part of it that made me sad – that in the future, there will be so many amazing inventions and discoveries and alas, they’ll probably arrive long after I’m gone and I won’t be able to see any of them.

Oh well.  People in 1801 would have marvelled at the iPad, so at least we’ve got that going for us.

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Interstellar and “Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night”

I saw Interstellar tonight and overall found it very moving and enjoyable.  As soon as I figure out what the hell happened, I’ll give it an actual review.  In the meantime, I wanted to share the text of the poem that featured prominently throughout the film:

DO NOT GO GENTLE INTO THAT GOOD NIGHT

BY: Dylan Thomas

Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

If you’re one of the 3-5 regular readers of this blog not including my Aunt Gertrude, you might remember I provided some analysis of this poem earlier this year.  Check it out by clicking here.

At its heart, the poem is about clinging to life even when death is imminent, but the lesson applies to encourage readers to keep trying to achieve goals even when thing appear bleak and unlikely.  The poem fits in the film – the characters face the imminent demise of Planet Earth, yet try to achieve the unlikely goal of finding a new planet for the human race to live on.  The astronauts/main characters have the unlikely task of exploring parts of space heretofore never visited by man and though there’s a high probability of death, they push on anyway.

Thanks Hollywood, for incorporating a classic poem in your latest film.

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