Apparently, Hollywood is getting its favorite major bomb of a movie out of the way early in 2017.
Monster Trucks is apparently going to cost its studio a $115 million loss even though it just happened. The plot follows a young mechanic who finds a monster living in his truck who powers and controls the truck. Other monsters come around, take over those trucks…so…yeah. Monster Trucks.
The trailer reminds me of 1980s goofy sci-fi/kid befriends nice creature movies. A hundred and fifteen million lost on a live action kids film released in January? I don’t know, someone goofed up somewhere.
However, critics are calling it the biggest pile of crap to walk out of crapville. (They didn’t say that exactly but that’s the general summary).
I hate to get too down on Hollywood. I am always encouraging them to do something new and stop all the reboots and remakes. But I guess you walk a fine line when it comes to kids movies. Animated appeals to kids more than live action.
Oh well. Monster Trucks, we hardly knew ye. What say you, 3.5 readers?
I love it when I can watch movies related to a project I’m working on and call it research.
Bruce Lee’s signature film, a super hairy Chuck Norris and a whole helluva lot of kung fu.
BQB here with a review of Way of the Dragon.
I have to be honest. This film is considered to be the quintessential martial arts film but when I look through it via a modern frame of mind then…well, yeah, it kind of stinks.
It’s basically one step above being a high school AV club project. The plot is goofy. In Rome, a mafia don wants a restaurant owned by Uncle Wang and, I guess his relative of some sort, maybe his daughter or some shit I don’t know because it’s hard to understand, so what the hell, we’ll just call her his daughter, Chen Ching Hua (Nora Miao).
Chen’s other uncle from Hong Kong sends a friend, Tang Lung (Bruce Lee), to Rome to help protect the restaurant and beat up some motherfuckers with his kung fu skills.
Throughout the film, there are cheesy jokes aplenty. For example, Tang Lung arrives at the airport and an old lady stares at him, unsure what to make of him. He then orders soup at an airport restaurant but his elderly waitress is confused as to what he wants. He points to soup on the menu a bunch of times, so she brings him like twenty bowls of soup.
Being a gentlemen, Tang Lung eats it all and then throughout the first part of the film it becomes a running joke that he needs to keep asking for a bathroom because he has the soupy shits.
Meanwhile, the don’s top henchman is a flamboyantly gay, scarf clad stereotype, so outlandish in fact that I’d love to get Ken Jeong on the phone just to ask if he based Mr. Chow in The Hangover films on this character.
Blah, blah, blah, there are a lot of jokes, a lot of fights, a lot of squabbling over what is going to happen to the restaurant and then, wham! There’s the big finish in which the don hires American martial artist Colt (aka Chuck Fucking Norris) to take down Tang Lung, because apparently, he really wants that fucking restaurant.
Add to the list of the movie’s plot holes a lack of an explanation as to why this restaurant is so important. The don goes through like nine-hundred henchmen just to get his hands on this joint. Is gold buried under the floor boards? Is it prime real estate that can be sold at a high markup? What the hell is going on here? Oh well. Nobody knows.
And I also digress. This film was Chuck Norris’ big screen debut and holy shit, was he a sight to behold in his youthful, pre-mustache glory. The man had a bear-like mange of chest hair, so luxurious that Bruce tears a hunk out of it during the final fight scene.
The man’s back was even hairy. That shit just wouldn’t fly today. If you want to be on screen then you have to be waxed, but they didn’t care about that shit in the 1970s. Hell, hairiness was a sign of virility. The hairier you were, the more poon you got and let me tell you, by the look of his back, young Chuck Norris was swimming in strange.
Can you believe I once had a girlfriend who complained about my hairy back? Shit. I bet young Chuck Norris didn’t have to put up with uppity broads trying to rub Nair all over his shoulder blades.
I have digressed again. Look, the film is on Netflix so you should check it out. Don’t shit on the film as I have but rather, keep in mind that it was a 1970s flick, made at a time when martial arts films were just getting started. Ignore the cheesiness, the silly jokes, and the terrible English voiceover dubbing.
The final fight scene is intense. Bruce and Chuck never speak to each other but it is clear they are both professionals. They silently taunt one another but they also fight with honor and respect.
Come for the movie. Stay until the end for the epic final showdown between Bruce and Chuck, two titans in all of their glory. Sadly, the world lost Bruce way, way too young, but at least Chuck stuck around long enough to grow a sweet mustache, appear in a shit ton of B movies and become an Internet meme.
STATUS: Shelf-worthy. Invent a time machine and bring me back to the 1970s, a time when men were men and the only limit to the amount of chicks they could bag was measured by the amount of bear-like fur on their manly chests and backs.
Welcome to my new column, “Could They Make It Today?” in which I go back in time, take a look at the pop culture of my Gen X youth (we did exist though we seem to have been forgotten early) and discuss how movies and/or TV shows from the past couldn’t be made in the present (at least not without an extensive tuneup).
First up, Transformers: The Movie (1986).
Now, if you’re a member of Generation X, and again, millennials, I swear we existed…we are the Baby Boomers’ kids and you just know more about the Baby Boomers because they are hanging on for a really long time thanks to advances in science and medicine and shit.
Let me try again. If you are are a member of Generation X, then you probably remember where you were when Optimus Prime died.
The year was 1986. Transformers were a popular line of children’s toys that combined a childish love of vehicles and robots by having robots turn into vehicles. Two toys in one.
There was a corresponding TV show in which Optimus Prime, a tractor trailer with a John Wayne style voice, commanded the Autobots in their war against the villainous Deceptions, lead by the evil Megatron.
So, after several years of a show where robots fired lasers at each other and missed, thus giving children a sense of excitement without burdening their young minds with thoughts of death, some dumb ass or collection of dumb asses got it in their heads to completely rewrite the direction of the series with a major motion film.
I went to it. I was a little kid. Had my popcorn. Had my Transformer. Had my seat. I was ready to have a good time and then boom…literally every character I loved dies.
Seriously. What the shit? Who thought this was a good idea?
Optimus Prime and Megatron clash on the field of battle. Megatron gets the upper hand and takes down Optimus.
OK. That was sad. I don’t think it was a great move for studio execs to kill off a beloved children’s character, especially the main one who carries the series.
But then it gets worse. There’s a scene where the main contingent of Autobots (i.e. Ratchet and Ironhide, etc.), characters who had been with the series since the start, are flying a shuttle back to…I don’t know, Autobot Town, I’m an adult now so I don’t give as many shits as I used to.
Long story short, Megatron and his lackies break down the door and totally Wild Bunch the shit out of the Autobots. I’m serious. After years of lasers that never hit anyone, Megatron’s lasers hit everyone with great precision.
And it’s not just like, “Boom! You’re dead!” We see the lights in the Autobots’ eyes flicker and go out. Smoke comes out of their mouths. Holes rip up their chassis. It’s total carnage and mayhem.
Death has been a part of kids movies since the beginning of animation. When Bambi’s mother dies, it introduces kids to concept they yeah, one day your grandparents are going to croak, then your parents, then pretty much everyone else you know until you end up all alone and the grim reaper puts his icy hand on your shoulder.
Personally, I didn’t even think it was cool for Disney to kill of Bambi’s mother but ok. There’s a difference between Bambi’s mother dying and the stone cold political/ideological assassination that takes place in the Transformers movie.
By the end of the film, new Autobots take over. “Rodimus Prime” takes Optimus’ place and as a kid, it’s basically the equivalent of your how you feel when your mom kicks dad out of the house and starts dating some new guy and wants you to call him “Dad.”
RODIMUS PRIME: Autobots, roll out!
1980s’ Kids: F%*k you! Only Optimus can say that! You’re not my real Autobot leader!
Like many cartoon shows, Transformers was a vehicle to sell toys. Kids bond with the characters on TV, look at them as if they are friends, and then want their parents to buy them a friend they can play with in the form of toys.
But some young 1980s Baby Boomer screwed the pooch because kids were highly displeased, so much so that Optimus Prime is brought back to life by the end of the series.
The whole movie was intended to reset the series and bring it to a futuristic 2005 (which, sadly, is now in the past) with the robots turning into sleeker, more futuristic robots.
Clearly, the assumption in the board room was that they’ll kill off all the main characters (even Megatron and company get converted into new characters) and then the kids will throw away all their old toys and buy these new toys.
Just as clearly, these people did not know kids. Have you ever tried to pry a beloved toy out of a kid’s hand? Good luck. Kids kept playing with their old transformers. In the battles that played out on living room furniture, Optimus and friends were still alive. T
The new replacements were seen as wannabe step-dads trying to buy our love with ice cream and thus, the series didn’t last much longer after that. The movie pretty much blew up the whole enterprise.
The idea went over like a lead balloon and was so widely rejected by kids that a GI Joe movie that came out around the same time was quickly rewritten to prevent Duke from dying. Those suits were totally gunning for Duke and he was only saved because Optimus’ death went over so poorly.
Could they make it today? Well, they do make it today. Now the Transformers films have become these grand scale Michael Bay action/disaster movies with plenty of action and very little plot. And yes, occasionally a Transformer will buy the farm in these movies but the millennials didn’t grow up with them and Generation X is still too old to care.
Although personally, I was sad when Jazz gets ripped apart in one of the new films.
I think the film taught the toy/cartoon industry complex a valuable lesson. You don’t have to kill off characters just to introduce new toys/characters. There was no reason why the Autobots couldn’t have lived and still made friends with new characters/toys that could be sold at parental wallet draining prices.
This is what frustrates me with the millennials. They think the baby boomers are mean and greedy and hey, I feel your pain. I’ve been feeling it ever since some Gordon Gecko-esque fancy suit wearing 1980s baby boomer prick decided that subjecting my young self to a scene where all my favorite toy characters suffer from political assassination was a good idea.
In conclusion, Generation X exists, and while Transformers movies continue to go on strong, the powers that be have learned to not kill off beloved children’s characters all willy-nilly.
The things I do for my 3.5 readers, like bothering to review this movie.
BQB here with a review of Why Him?
So, at the outset, the premise sounds like a pretty standard Christmas comedy. Dad does not like the man his daughter he is dating but powers through it and realizes that the guy isn’t that bad.
Problem is that there’s a big age difference between the couple and uh, well, it’s creepy.
Bryan Cranston is businessman Ned Fleming, who has been asked by his daughter Stephanie (Zoey Deutch) to come out to California to spend the holidays and meet her new boyfriend, Laird (James Franco).
Problem is Stephanie is 22, Laird is 32 (although if you’re a movie buff like me, then you know that Franco is closer to 40 which just makes the whole thing odd).
Laird isn’t just an eccentric weirdo, he’s also an Internet millionaire app developer, which is apparently the only way anyone came become a millionaire these days, but don’t get me started on the economy. That’s a whole other article altogether.
Where was I? Cranston is put with the paces, cashing in on a big holiday film after breaking through with Breaking Bad. Laird is into all sorts of oddball things and Cranston goes through all of them to comedic effect.
I can’t lie. There are parts of the movie that are hysterical. It was nice to see Megan Mullally with a big film part as Cranston’s wife/Stephanie’s mother as she is overdue.
Griffin Gluck is funny as the goofy little brother. Cedric the Entertainer is great as Cranston’s second-in-command at the office. Keegan Michael-Key is a riot as Laird’s estate manager Gustav.
Kaley Cuoco (Penny from The Big Bang Theory) actually steals the show as the voice of Laird’s home AI. It’s fun to hear Penny say naughty things.
All in all, it’s got all the great trappings of a fun holiday comedy/date movie but…eh…maybe it’s my #OscarsSoPretty activism but I just couldn’t over the age difference between the Stephanie and Laird.
The age difference is addressed in the film, Laird comes across as a good dude that’ll do right by her and everything but let’s be honest:
Rich guy 40 year old dates your 22 year old daughter – you’ll probably be cool with it. It’ll be weird at first but he’s rich and shit.
Ugly broke 40 year old dates your 22 year old daughter – you’ll be reaching for your shotgun.
It’s funny. It’s actually a decent film as throw away comedies that you’ll never watch again go but…eh, the age difference weirded me out.
STATUS: Borderline shelf-worthy. No need to rush to the theater. Worth a rental.
By: Special Guest Reviewer Video Game Rack Fighter
I’m just going to say it. It’s unfair that I only get to review video game based films because nine times out of ten they suck so bad even Vinny Baggadouchio can’t cure them.
Ha. Inside humor.
Video Game Rack Fighter here with a review of Assassin’s Creed.
While we’re on the subject of films that suck, is it me or did this whole holiday season lineup kind of blow turds? Other than Rogue One and Passengers, Hollywood shit the bed this year.
Anyway, this video game based film didn’t suck as much as you might expect, though there was a certain amount of suckage. Maybe 60 non-suck and 40 suck if I’m feeling generous.
Why do video game movies usually suck? Because video games are usually written with a player in mind, not a viewer.
Case in point – in Assassin’s Creed, you, the player, are put into a machine that allows you, through advances in DNA science, to travel back in time in your mind and control the actions of your ancestor who shares the same DNA.
In other words, as a video game player, you might relate more to controlling a 15th century assassin than you would actually being a 15th century assassin. After all, what do you know about being a 15th century assassin? (Then again, what do you know about controlling one?)
It’s an idea that works well in the game, but not so much in the film. The story keeps switching between present day Cal (Michael Fassbender), a convict under the thumb of Sofia (Marion Cotillard) and Aguilar, Cal’s 15th century assassin ancestor (also played by Michael Fassbender).
Ultimately, there are two worlds and two plots, neither of which were fully explored within the movie’s timeframe. In fact, I dare say they spent too much time on the present day stuff and not enough time on the past stuff, where the best action in the game occurs. (The present day controlling your ancestor bit is basically just something that moves the game along).
The effects are great, the ancient fight scenes are awesome, but as video games so often do, it left me feeling “meh.”
If they ever do a sequel, and sadly given the ending it looks like they will, they’d be well-informed to know that the ancient assassin being controlled is the main attraction and the person doing the controlling is just a side show. I came for Michael Fassbender in a murdering people in a cloak. I got a little bit of that and a lot of Michael Fassbender being moody and grunting angrily, as he does in most of his films.
Funny, when this game came out years ago, I was excited for it as it promised to be Splinter Cell in ancient times. If you’ve never played Splinter Cell, you play as a secret agent who doesn’t win by shooting but by stealth. You have to sneak into a building, crawl around on the ceiling, through vents, up elevator shafts and subdue enemies without any one knowing.
Alas, the original Assassin’s Creed, wasn’t that well-developed. Missions called for you to be sneaky but the program was a little too sensitive as you’d inevitably be discovered and have to go on a stabbing spree just to get away.
The games did get better over the years, with games taking place on pirate ships and during the American Revolutionary War.
STATUS: Moderately shelf-worthy. Not worth seeing in the theater. Worth a rental.
“I am one with the force and the force is with me.”
But if you read on, the SPOILERS will be with you.
So seriously. If you haven’t seen this movie yet, then a) you aren’t a true nerd and b) stop reading so the movie isn’t ruined for you.
This is a review for people who have seen the movie and want to talk about it.
I’m serious, 3.5 scruffy looking nerf herders. This is your last chance to avoid SPOILERS.
OK, now that the true nerds are here, let’s talk. This isn’t so much a review as it is a list of observations:
#1 – The Opening Crawl and the Usual Theme Song Weren’t Used
This is the franchise’s first foray outside of the saga, i.e. the ongoing plot line in which the Skywalker family’s petty bullshit spills over into the galaxy and ruins everything. Stupid Skywalkers.
Even so, I missed the opening crawl and the theme song. There was a variation of the theme song but it wasn’t the same. I assume someone made a decision that the crawl must be reserved for the saga only.
At least they split the difference by throwing, “A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away…” up there.
Nerds must be satisfied.
#2 – It was the best Star Wars Movie I’ve Seen in a Long Time
Last year’s The Force Awakens was OK, but let’s be honest, it was basically just a retelling of Episode IV except Luke is a girl now.
Rogue One has guts, grit, and best of all, an interesting plot, which brings us to…
#3 – The Hollywood suits didn’t do business as usual with this one and it paid off.
Think about the decisions that were made in this film:
Jyn Erso isn’t a role model – Jyn (Felicity Jones) is a space convict who has committed crimes. While, given her back story, those crimes are understandable, she probably wouldn’t be a Hollywood suit’s first choice when it comes to merchandising. Squeaky clean Rey is the poster girl for lunch boxes, shirts, and yes, even posters. I mean, I haven’t been paying attention so maybe there is Jyn merchandise but all in all, “space convict” wouldn’t be a suit’s first choice and yet her being a space convict made the story more interesting.
The Rebels don’t come across as total angels – Yes, for seven films now we’ve heard of the bravery of the Rebel Alliance but low and behold, now we learn they have done some nasty shit. It is unavoidable in war. The concept of how far a side should go in the name of a cause they believe in is explored. Saw Gerrera (Forrest Whittaker) even commits acts of terrorism against the Empire that are so bad he has been denounced by the Rebels. I can hear the suits worrying that toy sales might drop if the Rebels are shown to have a bad side but hey, it made the movie better.
Everyone dies at the end – Sorry, but I did tell you this review would be spoilery. Yes! Everyone freaking dies at the end! Hollywood suits surely worry about shit like this. “Why would kids buy action figures based on characters who are dead? How can the kids act out new stories if the characters have bought the farm?” The suits were ignored. Everyone dies and repeat after me, “the movie was better for it.”
#4 – Chirrut Imwe is the first non-Jedi follower of the Force religion we’ve seen (that I know of) – I’m sure there are nerds who would be willing to tell me that I’m wrong, but Chirrut (Donnie Yen) is a martial artist as well as a big believer in the Force, but at no time in the movie does he actually use the Force. Come to think of it, that was also a big deviation from the saga. The Force isn’t used much (by any one good, anyway) and there are no light saber duels. There is a light saber bitch slap session conducted by a certain dark helmet wearing fellow, but we will get to that.
#5 – The space battle was awesome – It really was, and in keeping with my #OscarsSoPretty activism, it is good to know that ugly actors always have a home in the cockpit of an X-Wing. X-Wing pilots can spend their time primping in front of a mirror, or they can practice their flight skills, but they can’t do both. And a banzai style ramming of a Star Destroyer? Yes, please.
#6 – K-2SO – The droid voiced by Alan Tudyk was the films much needed comic relief. That’s all I have to say about him.
#7 – Reviving old characters through CGI – Princess Leia and Grand Moff Tarken both make CGI aided appearances. Usually, I think this move does not end well (it totally sucked with Jeff Bridges in the latest Tron fiasco) but it worked well here. They looked very real.
#8 -It’s a one and done – Really. They all die at the end. No sequels. The box office totals have been great, but the money that can be made off of these characters is limited. Oh, who am I kidding? They could always do something like, “Jyn Erso: The Early Years” or “Fun Times with Saw Gerrerra.”
#9 – Darth Vader is a F*%King Badass and It’s About F*%King Time – Remember all those prequels that promised to tell the life story of Darth Vader, the man who became Space Hitler? Remember how they turned out to be glorified children’s cartoons geared toward toy merchandising? Yes. Very disappointing. Pod racing was the last thing that was on Darth’s mind when he was slicing, dicing, and julienning those rebels and, I’ll say it again, “the movie was better for it.”
Speaking of…
#10 – The Ending Was BRILLIANT – I’ve read some critics who are pooping all over the ending. These critics are idiots. This movie perfectly lines up with Star Wars IV: A New Hope. Remember, IV begins with Darth Vader being totally rip shit over missing Death Star plans and he ends up tearing ass all throughout the Rebel fleet, giving light saber enemas to anyone who stands between him and the plans. We are then told that some rebels died in order to get these plans to Princess Leia. Ergo, this film is the story of how those rebels got their grubby mitts on those plans. It really is the best story of how a vent in a giant planet killing machine was found.
Was Darth Vader brutally violent as he begins his search for the plans at the end of this film? Yes. But I’ve been waiting for him to kick ass again for a long time and Disney finally gave me what I wanted. You can now watch Rogue One before watching IV and plot wise, the films line up perfectly.
Do I care that your kid might get nightmares of Darth Vader going on a lightsaber slashing spree? Yes, but that just means you should leave your kid at home because I should be able to enjoy Darth’s lightsaber slashing spree.
Darth Vader is Space Hitler. Darth Vader chokes bitches who do him wrong out with the Force. Darth Vader will not hesitate to cut a bitch with his red lightsaber. I’m sorry that in the late nineties and early 2000s, George Lucas led your child to believe that Darth was “Ani,” the little boy who pod raced, had Jar Jar as a side kick and fell in love with a space queen over a space picnic. Ani is gone. Darth Vader remains. Darth Vader will Force choke a rebel bitch. Darth Vader will even Force choke his own people. You might call that workplace harassment but Darth calls it employee motivation.
STATUS: Shelf-worthy. See it on the big screen. The best Star Wars film since Empire. (Although I do like Return of the Jedi even though many nerds don’t).
Merry Christmas and Yippy Ki Yay 3.5 motherfuckers!
It’s time to talk about why Die Hard should be your favorite Christmas movie:
#10 – First action film where the hero didn’t have almost super hero like powers. In the 1980s, Schwarzenegger and Stallone put out a shit ton of flicks where they’d shoot ten million bad guys without ever reloading and never get a scratch on them. Meanwhile, McClane is a cop, so he has training, but this one man vs. a terrorist organization is a situation that your average cop couldn’t handle on his own. Though I love Arnie and Sly, I can relate to McClane.
#9 – Hans Gruber is a bad ass, a gentleman super thief who is all about the money. He love suits, love talking about gentlemanly activities, and calmly enjoys a shrimp cocktail he snagged from the Nakatomi Christmas party as he informs the guests they’ll be shot if they try anything funny. RIP Alan Rickman.
#8 – It launched Reginald VelJohnson’s career and gave us Family Matters. In Die Hard, Reginald plays working class father/cop Al Powell, McClane’s only friend on the outside. While all the law enforcement big wigs worry about rules and procedures, McClane and Al share that same cut the BS mindset. Carl Winslow is so similar to Powell that you could, if you want, just assume that Al couldn’t take all the heat after Nakatomi, so he moved to Chicago, transferred to the Chicago PD, and raised a family next door to a nerd named Steve Urkel who lusts after his daughter and blows up his house with his harebrained science experiments.
I really feel there should have been at least one episode where Carl should have shouted, Yes, Steve! You did do that! And living next door to you is worse than the Christmas I spent talking John McClane through the Nakatomi Tower terrorist bank robber attack!”
#7 – Argyle plays Run-DMC’s “Christmas in Hollis” as he drives McClane to the Christmas party. It is truly the best of all Christmas rap songs. One might argue that “Christmas Wrapping” by the Waitresses qualifies but…eh, it’s really an 80s love ballad disguised as a rap. The Waitresses were great, but they didn’t represent Queens.
#6 – McClane is also relatable because of his marital troubles. Sometimes a couple can have a fight and there is no easy answer as to who is right. Holly got a great job that took her to LA. Yes, McClane could have supported her but then again he had his own career as a New York police officer and she signed up to be with a man based in New York when she married him. Reverse the situation and you might think McClane to be a dick if he were hired for a job with the LAPD and demanded that his wife give up a job she enjoyed in NYC. Hell, if she makes enough, maybe McClane could have just left police work all together and moved to LA with his wife and taken a job as a security guard at Disney Land or something, though I doubt he would have enjoyed that.
#5 – McClane and Powell both have the same receding hairline, yet Hollywood suits allowed them to be main characters in a movie anyway. Sigh. If they ever remake Die Hard without Bruce Willis (blasphemy, for it really is a perfect movie) they surely will hire some hot stud muffin douche with a full head of hair.
#4 – Great lines that have worked their way into pop culture. “Yippy ki yay motherfucker!” because, after all, McClane was a baby boomer and baby boomers loved their cowboy films. A similar hero today might quote from a comic book movie or something. Also, I have found myself saying, “Welcome to the party, pal” on occasion, usually when someone realizes something way later than they should have.
#3 – Die Hard with a Vengeance is really the best sequel in the franchise. Die Hard 2 is ok and/or acceptable. However, in 4 and 5 (the films that take place in the 2000s), the franchise takes a bad turn when they do break the “average guy caught at the wrong place at the wrong time” as we see McClane starting to have those Arnie/Sly-like supernatural action hero powers. Yes, I think a plucky young cop might be able to suck it up and run through a floor full of glass with no shoes on and survive (as it happens in the original). No, I don’t a cop could hang onto the nose of a fighter jet and survive (as happens in 4).
#2 – Dick Thornburgh is an epic douche, as most media types are. See? Reporters were douches like before social media. All about hype, not really caring if they hurt anyone (i.e. barging into the McClane residence and broadcasting that Holly is married to John, thus making the situation much more dangerous).
#1 – Arnie was originally considered for McClane’s role. Arnie was great, and very much the John Wayne of the 1980s, but I’m glad Willis got the role. Die Hard might have been ok with Arnie, but a massive Austrian weightlifter who probably could rip terrorists in half off screen as well as on screen just isn’t as relatable as an average cop with a receding hairline and a wife he’s separated from.
In conclusion, Die Hard is my favorite Christmas movie and it should be yours too. Thanks, 3.5
Bookshelf Battle 