Hey 3.5 readers. Your old pal BQB here.
Do you want to write like me? Well, you can’t. The only way you could conceivably ever be able to write like me would be to invent a time machine and arrange for Ernest Hemingway to bang Jane Austen and somehow become the resulting love child.
No time machine? Well, sorry, you’re screwed, but that’s ok, I’ll still give you some of my best ideas for the low, low, incredibly low price of 99 cents. My prices are insane and I’m practically giving my writing prompts away.
You know, 3.5 readers, I’m not trying to guilt you but I do have expenses here at BQB HQ. I have to keep the moat stocked with toilet gators to keep zombies and solicitors at bay. I have to keep my yeti cage electrified. I need to scrape the barnacles off my feet. Seriously. This place is hemorrhaging money.
So help me by putting your finger in my financial dyke and buy your copy today. If you can’t afford 99 cents then take stock of your life choices and stop drinking and get a job so that you can afford a copy of my fine book.
Thank you, 3.5 readers.