Boy, am I ever tired of hearing this one, 3.5 readers. In fact, I’m so tired, that’s me above, shouting into my iconic bullhorn.
Iconic! Everything is so iconic! So and so is sooooo iconic. This actor is iconic. That actress is iconic. That singer is iconic. That athlete is iconic. This person is iconic. That person is iconic. That outfit is iconic. That dog is iconic. That cat is iconic. Look at my breakfast! It is so iconic! My cornflakes are so iconic! My scrambled eggs? You better believe they’re iconic! Oh boy a few hours later I will poop it all out and those poops? Iconic!
Usually you can trace a trend like this to the source. Someone famous said it or something but its just like every nimrod got together and decided “iconic” was the new thing. It’s someone decided to make fetch happen but it actually happened. WTF? Why is iconic so iconic?
Icon defined (according to the iconic Oxford dictionary, which is very iconic) = “a person or thing regarded as a representative symbol or worthy of veneration (veneration defined as great respect or reverence.”
So, in another words, someone or something to be worshipped. Is that what we’re doing now? We got rid of God and we’re replacing him with dum-dum celebrities and stupid bricka-brack? “Oh, did you hear the latest Dua Lipa song? She’s so iconic? Mmm, these truffles are so iconic! Hold on, I have to take an iconic call on my iconic iPhone! Hello? Iconic person here. Who’s calling? Are you iconic?”
Everyone is saying that everything is iconic but no one says that someone or something is an icon because that would essentially be giving up the goose. It would be admitting that this is all blasphemous. No one says that skinny waif Ariana Grande who probably only eats three iconic almonds a year is an icon. No, that would be going too far. Then you’d be saying she’s a deity. So, people say she’s iconic. Like a deity. That’s ok. That’s fine with everyone. Jesus died for our sins but Ariana sings pop songs so you know, she’s to be worship liked Jesus.
Think I’m joking? Here’s an alternate definition of “icon” provided by the Iconic Oxford Dictionary, which is iconic:
“a painting of Jesus Christ or another holy figure, typically in a traditional style on wood, venerated and used as an aid to devotion the Byzantine and other Eastern Churches.”
That’s right. Icons are also paintings of Jesus and other holy figures – relics that are worshipped by religious people to demonstrate their piety and everybody is just throwing “iconic” around. “Oh blah blah blah, I’m an idiot and I think this spaghetti is so tasty its iconic and did you catch that TV show on Netflix? It was so iconic and OMG this new Halsey single is so freaking iconic.”
I’m not joking. Sometimes when I absolutely have to I venture out of my hermit cave and wade through the unwashed masses and I listen to the stupid millennials. It may not even be the stupid millennials anymore. Who is the generation after the stupid millennials? Whatever. They’re probably stupid too.
Anyway I listen, not that I’m eavesdropping but because they’re loud and obnoxious so you can’t help it and they’re always “iconic” this and “iconic” that. My goldish is iconic. These flaming hot cheatos are iconic. Those socks are iconic.
I hear it on the radio. I hear it in podcasts. People say it in stupid YouTube videos. It is all over social media. I can’t take the iconic saturation anymore.
People, please. Enough with the iconic already.
Bookshelf Battle 