Tag Archives: Movies

Movie Review – Avengers: Infinity War (2018)

I can’t believe it took me a week to see this flick.  Maybe my reputation as the Internet’s greatest nerd is ill-deserved.

BQB here with a review of “Avengers: Infinity War.”

Where did the past 10 years go, 3.5 readers?  I remember watching “Iron Man” in 2008, thinking Marvel was really onto something here and, well, if only I could time travel back 10 years, take the seat next to me and give myself some advice on how to negotiate the next decade.

Oh well.  No use crying over spilt milk.

Speaking of not crying, we have a seasoned cast of superheroes now, and damn, there are a lot of them.  You’ve got the Avengers…the various hangers-on who help the Avengers, the Guardians of the Galaxy, the assorted interlopers who mingle in these worlds…you’ve got a lot of characters.  Is it too many?  Maybe not.

After all, this film is our reward for sticking with the franchise for so long.  Once you watch the individual films, as well as the group get-together films, you spend a lot of time with these characters, getting to know what makes them tick, and thus films like this are possible, i.e. where the individuals come and go, make their entrances and exits and you understand their motivations by now.

There was a brief moment in the beginning where I wondered if this whole spectacle hadn’t jumped the shark.  Maybe it’s just because I’m getting older but when you really think about it, I mean, seriously…you’ve got a man in an iron suit, a Norse God, a green monster, a patriot, a computer man, a witch, wizards, a spiderman, a cat man, a flying guy, another guy in an iron suit, a lady assassin, a band of space pirates and their talking raccoon…WTF?  How do these all fit together?

At one point, I was like, “Wow.  There are way too many Avengers.  Like seriously, I can’t keep up with all these Avengers.  There is a ridiculous amount of superheroes on screen right now.”

Somehow, Disney/Marvel makes it all work.  In past movies, we’ve been teased with an impending Thanos (Josh Brolin) attack and it pays off big time here, as he’s the villain to end all villains, the big bad that the Avengers et. al. will have to throw everything at, including the kitchen sink, the toilet, the toilet paper, the plunger and so on.

It’s an intergalactic battle royale featuring different planets, different locations on Earth, different bands of heroes duking it out with different bands of Thanos’ cronies, all in the name of gathering the infinity stones, which the infamous ne’er-do-well hopes to use to engage in acts of evil-doery across the cosmos.

There are touching moments, hilarious moments, humor, laughter, suspense and I don’t want to give it away but Disney/Marvel does go in quite an unexpected direction, one that defies the typical ending of these films and perhaps when all 3.5 of you have had a chance to see it, we can discuss it further.

STATUS: Shelf-worthy.  Kudos to Disney/Marvel for keeping this franchise alive, still going strong, still being as magical as ever.  Thank you to all the actors who didn’t let fame go to their heads and bail on their recurring characters.  It’s been quite a ride and I can’t wait to see what happens next.

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , ,

Movie Review – Super Troopers 2 (2018)

I’d like one liter of review, please.

BQB here with a review of the long awaited, “Super Troopers 2.”

Ahh, “Super Troopers.”  It’s one of those cult classic films.  I don’t believe it was much of a breakout success when it came out in 2001, but over time, comedy aficionados spread the news of its glory through open mouth and I admit, whenever I catch it on TV, I watch and I laugh and laugh and laugh.

The original was brilliant in its stupidity.  The Broken Lizard boys, a bunch of friends who formed a movie making comedy troop, really managed to catch lightning in a bottle in that movie.  And to their credit, they understand a brand of comedy that’s becoming more and more forgotten, namely, a style that isn’t quote unquote “woke,” it’s not educational, it’s not trying to educate you or make you a better person…it’s just about trying to make you laugh.  Fart jokes.  Dick jokes.  Sex jokes.  Drug jokes.  Jokes your Grandma will not approve of.

Can you ever go home again?  By asking that, I mean, were these guys able to recreate the magic of the original?  The brief version – no, I think once you make something that really knocks an audience’s socks off, it’s hard to do it again.  It’s not that this movie isn’t funny, it’s just that the first one was so much funnier.

This go around is more or less a rehash of the last.  In the original, the boys sparred with a local police department while trying to break a drug ring.  Here, they also spar with a local police department while trying to break a drug ring.

There’s a notable difference though, namely, that there’s a town on the Canadian border that, due to some political wrangling, is about to be annexed to the United States.  The troopers, down on their luck and long out of the law enforcement game due to some “shenanigans” are called back into action to rejoin the Vermont highway patrol and keep the new town safe.

This isn’t an easy task, seeing as how the Canucks are none too pleased at the concept of being Yanks.  Canadians are lampooned as hyper sensitive, perverted French tree people  Americans are sent up as obese, stupid, overly patriotic imperialists.  Meh, both stereotypes are probably fair to a certain extent.

So many comedy sequels fall into the trap of rehashing old, popular jokes from the first film.  I heard two of the guys on a podcast talking about the pressure they faced from fans on the Internet – repeat all the old jokes but make it original!

It’s clear from the film that’s not something the dudes wanted to do out right.  Thus, they pay homage to the jokes, they’re acknowledged, the cap is tipped to them though they aren’t necessarily repeated.  For example, in the first film, the outrageous douche Farva comes close to blows with a teenage drive-thru clerk who doesn’t understand what a “liter of cola” is.  This go around, Farva is in Canada, where the metric system is well-established, so the waiter at a restaurant is able to bring him liters of cola to his heart’s content.  To repeat the joke would have been to have Farva kick another drive thru nerd’s ass over the misunderstanding but the homage is that at long last, Farva found a restaurant worker who knew what “a liter of cola” meant.

It’s dumb.  It’s silly.  At some point when you see Farva being watched through heat vision goggles and the fart clouds pop out of his butt in all their red heat signature glory, you realize you’re getting a much needed break from the new, godawful, PC, “don’t hurt anyone’s feelings,” woke brand of virtue signaling comedy.  Let Samantha Bee, Stephen Colbert, Jimmy Kimmel and Jon Oliver bitch about politics…I’m going to check out and watch the Broken Lizard boys yuck it up for awhile.

Rob Lowe stars as the Mayor of the Canadian town in question.  As usual, he looks like he’s struck a deal with the devil to remain so handsome (it’s not gay if I say that, right?) well into his older years and…well, there’s one joke that I won’t give it away but you wonder just how the Broken Lizard crew managed to talk him into it.

In summary, it’s not as good as the first one, but in any walk of life, is the repeat of something ever as good as the first time it happened?  It’s not for lack of trying and they did provide me with some uncontrollable laughs.  Laughter is the most honest reaction.  Either it happens or it doesn’t.  Your body can’t hold it back if it wants to.

I have no idea about any behind the scenes wrangling but I do wonder if the PC wave has kept Broken Lizard from soaring.  Come to think of it, 2006’s “Beerfest” was the last movie I remember seeing boobs in and I don’t remember seeing boobs in a movie again until, well, this one.  I’ll have to wait to see boobs in a movie until “Super Troopers 3” I suppose.  Sure, Thor and Iron Man can knock out enemies left and right and that’s ok to watch but put some fun bags in a film and “Oh my God! It’s the end of the world!”

To BL’s credit, they’re a good example of what crowdsourcing can do.  They raised the money to make this film from the fans, waging an Internet campaign to raise the required loot.

Alas, in this PC age where the studios want nothing more than to jam the same exact, 1,045th copy of a film about Amy Schumer demanding to be loved despite being a drunken ho-bag, a good, old-fashioned bear attack on a jackass in a porta potty can only happen on screen now via donations from knuckle dragging troglodytes like me who want to see that sort of thing (although, I’m a cheap prick who didn’t give BL a dime, I did root them on in spirit.)

STATUS:  Shelf-worthy.  It’s up to you if you want to see it now or wait to rent.  If you’re a true super fan, you’ll want to check it out.

Tagged , , , , ,

Movie Review: Pacific Rim: Uprising (2018)

Robots vs. Monsters!

BQB here with a review of “Pacific Rim: Uprising.”

The original “Pacific Rim” was just that – something original amidst a landscape of reboots and sequels that we were sick of even five years ago.

The premise?  In the future, monsters (Kaiju) pop out of the sea to destroy cities in an attempt to conquer the world.  Humans respond by creating Jaegers, giant robots that can be piloted by a duo of humans whose minds must be in sync in order to use their brains to control the robot’s movements.  Cue training scenes where main characters must learn to control their angst in order to achieve mental clarity and save the day.

In this go around, ten years have passed since the end of the human vs. monster war.  Peace has broken out, though reconstruction efforts are slow and many cities remain in ruin.  Jake Pentecost, a former “Ranger” (a robot driver) and son of Idris Elba’s character in the first film, has bummed out of the military and exists as a scavenger, snatching up leftover parts from defeated Jaegers who have been left to rot on the depleted battlefields of yesteryear.

Blah, blah, blah, shenanigans ensue.  He and Amari (Cailee Spaeny), a young fellow scavenger, are snapped up by the Rangers, who demand that Amari enlist and Jake reenlist, because…um…apparently people who break the law are wanted for the military I guess?

Nate Lambert (Scott Eastwood) commands the unit that these two ne’er-do-wells are assigned to.  There are many contentious scenes between Nate and Jake that are reminiscent of “Top Gun.”  Nate takes the Val Kilmer/Ice Man approach of telling Jake that he’s a loose cannon that’s going to get everyone killed.  Jake takes the Maverick/Tom Cruise approach of going with the flow and telling Nate to loosen up.

Is there a plot?  Yes.  Somehow, Jaegers are popping up all over and smashing up cities.  Say it ‘aint so!  How did these mighty robot warriors go bad?  It’s a mystery our heroes will have to solve.

Umm…there’s little more I can get into at this point without revealing spoilers.  Overall, it’s fun, a good visual spectacle, and it’s self-aware – it’s not trying to make us think this is a film more meaningful than a bunch of robots and monsters smacking the crap out of each other.

STATUS:  Shelf worthy.  Worth a trip to the big screen.

Tagged , , , , ,

Movie Review – Downsizing (2017)

Oh, the joys of being small!  I know all about small things.  For example, my audience is a mere 3.5 readers.  Don’t even get me started on what’s in my pants.

BQB here with a review of “Downsizing.”

What if all of your problems, and coincidentally, all of the world’s problems, could be solved by a simple invention?

In the world of this film, “downsizing” or the process of turning humans very, very small, has been invented.  At first, the idea sounds ridiculous, but then when you think about it, if it worked, it might not be a terrible idea.

Got money problems?  You don’t anymore.  Can you afford a box?  That’s a mansion for a tiny person.  Can you buy one bottle of vodka?  Cool.  That’s a lifetime booze supply.  Drive a car the size of a toy, nourish your body on mere crumbs and international travel is as easy as being shipped in your very own, comfy little box.

And what a boon for the environment!  Why, an entire tiny city’s supply of trash made in four years can fit in a single garbage bag!

Amidst this backdrop lives Paul Safranek (Matt Damon), a down on his luck occupational therapist who, due to a string of bad luck, missed out on all his lifelong dreams and struggles just to make ends meet.

Downsizing has become all the rage, marketed heavily to the masses as a way to live like a king for pennies on the dollar.  When life becomes a daily grind, Paul and wife, Audrey (Kristin Wiig) decide to shrink themselves and move to the tiny community known as Leisure Land, where they are promised that they will be able to live like movie stars in their own luxurious estate, only with the $150,000 they are able to raise from selling their modest home in the big world.  Turns out that sum is equal to $12 million bucks in tiny town.

Seems to good to be true?  Well, I don’t want to give it away.  The first half of the film is devoted to just showing a lot of fun things that might happen if the world were to get small.  At first, it’s a concept driven film, discussing all of the ramifications of miniaturization and to the writers’ credit, they get in deep, discussing not just the fun parts but also the ethical ramifications as well as the potential for abuse by unscrupulous characters (one such fellow being Paul’s new neighbor, a smuggler played by Christoph Waltz.)

After the coolness of seeing mini people live their lives wears off, the film struggles to find a plot, or any sense of meaning.  Celebrity cameos come and go – Jason Sudeikis, Neil Patrick Harris, etc.  A cleaning lady, Ngoc Lan Tran (Hong Chau), helps Paul find meaning in his new existence.

Eventually, I ended up hoping that someone would come along and downsize the film’s running time.  Will there be a villain?  Will there be some downside to downsizing that was heretofore unexpected?  Will the proverbial other shoe ever drop?

You spend so much time being wowed by the awesomeness of smallness in the first half that you feel invested and have to press through the second half but alas, like a botched Mexican shrink job where an unshrinkable filling is left inside the shrinking patient’s head, I too ended up wishing my head would explode just to get the film over with already.

There was some potential here and although protecting the environment is important, I think the film starts off with a fun message (i.e. perhaps science might find a fun, awesome way to save the environment) but then descends into preachiness (you’re ruining the earth with pollution and Matt Damon feels really, really bad about it, you suck bag.)

And yes, you are, but you know, I came for the entertainment, not for Matt Damon’s melancholic ennui.  If he’s worried about the environment, he can take one less private jet ride per year.

Sigh.  I just think like, I don’t know, a more dramatic turn, like a psycho villain who wants to stomp on little people towns or something might have given the film more pizzazz but nope, they just focused on the melodrama.

STATUS:  Stay for the first half.  Feel free to downsize the second half by changing the channel.

Tagged , , , ,

Play Rampage Online for Free!!!

Hey 3.5 readers.

BQB here.

I loved playing “Rampage” as a kid.  Well, if you’re like me and want to play it again…I’m surprised I missed this but as a promotion for the movie with “The Rock” a site was made that allows you to play the classic version of the game right in your web browser.

Punch buildings, eat humans, and go crazy as a giant gorilla, lizard or wolf:

PLAY RAMPAGE NOW!

Tagged , ,

Movie Review – Train to Busan (2016)

Zombies on a train!

BQB here with a review of “Train to Busan.”

As a zombie fan, I’ve been hearing mumblings about this movie in the nerd-o-sphere for awhile now.  It’s foreign, the characters speak Korean and it’s in subtitles, but foreign language films don’t necessarily stop me as long as the subject matter is something I’m interested in.  Personally, I prefer to read the subtitles and that combined with listening to the tone of voice and facial expressions I can get the gist of what’s going on even though I don’t speak the same language as the actors.  Funny how there are some things that transcend language barriers.

Anyway, in many ways, it’s a typical set-up.  Mom is divorced from Dad, Seok-woo (Yoo Gong), ostensibly because he works too much in his job as a stock broker, and apparently no matter where you are in the world, wanting to work hard is considered a crime by the ladies but that’s ok.  My review doesn’t need to be spoiled by my personal baggage.

Young daughter, Soo-an (Su-an Kim) misses her mother, who lives in Busan, and wants to cut her visit to her father’s home short.  After much wrangling, Dad concedes and hops a train with his kiddo.

Yadda, yadda, yadda…zombies!  A virus breaks out and South Korea is overrun with brain biters.  Worse, they’ve overtaken most cars on the train, leaving human survivors with only a few cars to move around on.

What happens next is a heroic tale of survival.  It becomes a constant running test when survivors are faced with a constant, repetitive choice, namely whether to slam a door between cars shut, sacrificing the life of a survivor who hasn’t made it through yet in order to protect one’s self and loved ones from the incoming zombie horde that’s chasing the unlucky human.

What would you do in that position?  Risk saving a fellow passenger, or slam the door in their face to protect yourself?  It’s a choice that’s made again and again, and as the movie progresses, we are left with a hope that maybe Seok-woo’s cold, businessman mentality might give way to a more humane, caring side.

Daughter Soo-an foils her dad’s efforts to think only for himself and his daughter.  She often lends a hand to complete strangers, putting herself at risk and in doing so, involving her old man in situations he’d rather avoid.

Meanwhile, the noble Sang-hwa (Dong-seok Ma) serves as a more overt check on Seok-woo’s conscience, almost bullying the man half his size to do the right thing.  While Seok worries chiefly about his daughter, Sang is worried about his pregnant wife, Seong-kyeong (Yu-mi Jeong).  Yet, he believes he can save her, his unborn child, and everyone else he can.

No movie would be complete without a villain and that comes in the form of Yon-suk (Eui-sung Kim), a train company executive who, unluckily for everyone else, happens to be riding on the train and is willing to sacrifice just about anyone and everyone just to save his oily hide from the gray matter chompers.

Overall, it’s a great film, a real thinker, with special effects that rival a Hollywood blockbuster.  Perhaps one of the more harrowing scenes comes when Seok, Sang and high school student, Yong Guk (Woo-sik Choi) form a three man phalanx and narrowly scrape through a tight car full of brain chewers in order to rescue their respective loved ones.

3.5 readers, Asia has really embraced the action genre and I don’t know if this is a new thing or perhaps it’s just something I’ve been turned onto thanks to Netflix, where you can find a vast cornucopia of Asian action films in subtitles.  Some are dubbed with American voices, but I do prefer to just read the subtitles, so catch this one before it obtains a mainstream level of popularity and they ruin it with dubbing.

The Ip Man Series and almost anything with Donnie Yen are worth watching and while Hong Kong seems to be Asia’s Hollywood, South Korea is catching up with this flick.

STATUS:  Shelf-worthy.  Seriously, I know a lot of people are like, “Ugh, I have to read subtitles?  No thanks.  Too much work.  It’s worth it and there’s plenty of action on screen to make up for it.  It’s currently available on Netflix.

Tagged , , , , ,

Movie Review – A Quiet Place (2018)

Shh!

Be vewy vewy quiet, 3.5 readers.  It’s time for BQB’s review of “A Quiet Place.”

I love it when I’m pleasantly surprised.  I knew very little of this film going into it.  I thought maybe it was just a standard horror flick that husband/wife duo John Krakinski and Emily Blunt whipped out but it’s anything but standard.  In fact, in this day of sequels, prequels and originals, you’ll want to scream for joy at this original idea.

But don’t.  Don’t make a sound.  You see, the world has been conquered by mysterious, scary creatures who, if you make a noise, will pop out of nowhere and eat you.  The population has been decimated and survivors live very quiet lives.  They make a modest amount of noise by walking around but other than that, no talking, no singing, no music and the slightest accident, i.e. knocking a plate onto the floor, can prove fatal.

There are exceptions to the “Be Quiet” rule.  There are places, circumstances, etc. where talking can happen but for the most part, the characters rely on sign language, subtitles and facial expressions to tell the story.  It’s impressive that the actors are able to get so much across by utilizing so little.  From a writing standpoint, it’s an exercise in “show, don’t tell” because all the characters can do is show.  They can’t tell.

Challenges abound.  Not to get too deep into it but daughter Regan (Millicent Simmonds) is deaf and lives in a world where there isn’t a place that will fix her broken hearing aid.  Just as in zombie apocalypse times, empty shops and ghost towns abound, and the Abbott family must get by through their wits and occasional scavenging.

Further, they engage in a variety of clever ways to go about their daily routine, figuring out how to get through their days as quietly as possible (an expected baby poses a significant challenge as we all know what babies love to do.)

STATUS:  An unexpected gem.  Shelfworthy.

Tagged , , , , , ,

Movie Review – Ready Player One (2018)

Gamers vs the Man!

BQB here with a review of “Ready Player One.”

3.5 readers, I went into this movie thinking it would suck…but it didn’t.  I love it when that happens, when I got into a movie thinking it will blow goats but instead it blows hot winds of fun into my face.

Hmm…phrasing.

Anyway…in the future, the world sucks.  Poor people live in trailers stacked on top of each other and life sucks so much that people spend all of their time in a virtual world, the OASIS, where they can be anyone and do anything rather than live in the sucky world.

There is a catch – to die means to lose all progress, money, enhancements etc. you’ve made to your avatar, and to start over from scratch.  Some have spent so much time building their online personas they’d rather die in real life than begin anew again in the virtual world.

Halliday (Mark Rylance), a socially awkward to the tenth degree nerd who developed the OASIS has died but he’s left an “Easter Egg” in his game, i.e. if a gamer can solve three mysteries, he/she will get three keys to use to unlock…dun dun dun…a prize, that being controlling stock interest in the OASIS (a lot of money plus ability to run the world’s most powerful video game which accounts for a substantial amount of the global economy.

I don’t want to get bogged into the details but suffice to say, I went in thinking this would be a glorified cartoon but instead, found an interesting look at a possible technological future.  The better virtual worlds get, will they be able to solve societal problems?  After all, few can be all they want to be in reality as they are so many people competing for so few opportunities, but if everyone can be beautiful, awesome, do whatever they want in a realistic virtual game….well, is that a way to make everyone happy or is that a way to keep people from experience reality, as drab as that may be sometimes?

Pop cultural references abound as Halliday was a fan of everything 1980s.    The hero of the film Wade/Parzival Tye Sheridan, drives a copy of Marty MacFly’s DeLorean, for example.  Somehow, he and his love interest, Art3mis/Samantha (Olivia Cooke) and a band of plucky young players must save the day and defeat Sorrento, owner of IOI, a corporation set up to dump thousands of players into the game for the sole purpose of finding the keys and gaining control of the OASIS for evil purposes.

From a writing standpoint, it’s pretty slick.  It makes me want to read Ernest Cline’s novel version to see how he did it.  You’ve got human players in the human world and they’re playing in the virtual world.  They go back and forth between worlds, almost simultaneously, as sometimes human heroes are trying to save their indisposed friends who are busy playing the game from an attack from real life baddies.  It gets very complicated so I’m always curious as to how authors navigate such difficult waters.

One complaint.  I hate to sound like an old man, but even though it’s PG-13, the word “fuck” is used.  Seriously, what the fuck?  It’s used in a joke and the joke lands, ergo it’s not gratuitous but still, are there standards or what?  Either “fuck” gets you an R rating or it doesn’t.  Further complaint, “shit” seems to be really creeping into PG-13 movies and it’s like, what the hell, either these are movies that families can take their older kids to or they aren’t.

All that said, the movie was fucking good.

STATUS:  Shelf-worthy.

Tagged , , , ,

Daily Discussion with BQB – Is it Wrong to Look at Your Cell Phone in a Movie Theater?

Hey 3.5 readers.

BQB here.

As you know, I’ve posted extensively on movie theater etiquette, believing the theater is a place where certain rules of decorum must be followed and no one should be doing things that bring down the enjoyment of others.

Thus, you can imagine my surprise when I, your humble blog host, was accused of engaging in such an activity.

While watching a movie, I felt my phone buzz.  It was a text message.  I looked at the screen for literally all of a second when a piece of candy whizzed by my head, landing on the floor next to me.

The text was from a BQB associate who wanted a ride from me after the movie, letting me know not to leave without said person.  I figured I’d wait till after the movie to respond, but a couple more texts came, the person was jittery I guess, wanting to make sure I didn’t leave, so I thought I’d just text back a quick, “OK.”

Literally, one more second after I looked at the screen again, the guy yells, “Hey dickhead!  Put it away!”

Now, I usually don’t confront people when they act like dicks.  In my youth, I often threw rude drivers the middle finger, only to get older and realize I should stop or else risk flipping off a possible serial killer.

So honestly, I tend to let a lot of things go out of a) fear the person will go nuts and the situation will become a big problem and b) maybe the person already punished himself by looking like a dick in public anyway.

But this one irked me.  I shouted back some choice words for the fellow and he piped down.  I admit, I had already determined it was a person I had a fairly decent chance of defending myself against if things went awry, though in retrospect, I shouldn’t acknowledged it….I don’t advise that you 3.5 readers engage such folk because you never know what someone is capable of, whether they appear threatening or not.

Anyway, the texter texted again and this time I got up, walked out of the theater and into the hallway just to type “OK” and it pissed me off because had Jerkface McGee not intervened, I could have typed ok earlier and gotten it all done with.

So, let me ask you this, 3.5 readers?   Does it bother you when someone’s cell phone screen is on during a movie?  Does the light of the screen distract you?  Does it bother you?  Does it hinder your movie enjoyment?

I don’t make it a point of pulling out my cellphone but this was a rare situation and….I mean maybe if I left the screen on for five minutes, but the exact second when it comes on the candy gets whipped?  Are you kidding me?

I don’t know.  Maybe I should have embellished.  “Hey assface, can you stop throwing the candy at me?!  I just found out my wife is in labor!!!!”

Eh…but then why would I be in a movie?  I guess because I’m a lousy husband.  Actually, I really am a lousy husband.  I’m such a bad husband I haven’t even gotten married yet.

Discuss, 3.5 readers.

Tagged , ,

Movie Review – Chappaquiddick (2018)

Err…uh…I can’t err…uh believe that liberal Hollywood allowed this movie to be made, 3.5 readers.

BQB here with an…err…uh review.

It was the summer of 1969 and as America kept their eyes glued to the moon landing, i.e. the crowning achievement of former President John F. Kennedy’s support of the space program, another Kennedy was partying on an island off the coast of Massachusetts.

Ted was, for lack of a better term, the runt of the Kennedy litter.  Joseph Kennedy died a WWII veteran, John died when he was assassinated during his presidency, Robert died while running for president.  As Ted (Jason Clarke) states in the film, Joe was the favorite, John had the charm, Robert was brilliant and if you believe in odds, then that didn’t leave much for him.

Long story short, on the fateful night in question, Ted, with young campaign worker Mary Jo Kopechne in his car, drives off a bridge.  He manages to escape but Mary Jo is left inside.  Rather than call the police for immediate help, he waits until the next morning to report the incident and well, as often happens, the cover up is worse than the crime.

Ted’s father, also named Joseph, a fabulously wealthy man who built a fortune as a bootlegger in the 1930s, is, at the time of the incident, a withered old stroke victim, little more than a disappointed expression glued on the face of a husk of a body.  He can barely get out a few words and when he does, it’s to let Ted know what a total letdown he is to the old man in comparison to his older, deceased brothers.

I hope I’m not spoiling this for anyone.  This is all old news for a politics junkie like me, but may be new to the general public.  I’ll admit I didn’t know a lot of the sordid details that went on behind the scenes in the ensuing “clean up.”

Joe Sr. maybe be physically useless, but his money, name and reputation still hold sway, and thus at the Kennedy compound in Hyannis, a cavalcade of the best political fixers of the 1960s convenes, each man copiously reviewing every last conceivable angle, leaving no stone unturned in an effort to remove Ted from any ability to be prosecuted.  Favors are called in, the media is manipulated, the judicial system is turned on its ear.

The most damning fact that the team had to contend with?  That Mary Jo had a large pocket of air left in the car, meaning that if Ted had simply called for help right away, the police could have rescued her.  Thus, the ongoing theme that sometimes politicians worry so much about how their political careers will be affected that they don’t do the right thing and this is unfortunate, as it is doing the right thing that often saves a political career.  Had Ted called the cops, the whole night could have been chalked up to a funny story where Ted made a wrong turn into the pond but luckily everyone escaped ok but instead…well, he did the wrong thing, a woman died, and in doing the wrong thing, he didn’t become president.

Another ongoing theme is that sometimes, not every member of a powerful or famous family is up to snuff.  Ted admits he lacks his brothers’ talents and yet feels overwhelming pressure to pursue politics – a life he wasn’t cut out for, a life that killed two of his brothers and causes him stress that he can’t endure, perhaps why he turned to alcohol and womanizing in life, though allegations of alcoholism and womanizing are merely danced around in this film.  The movie focuses on what it can prove and only tangentially mentions longtime rumors, speculation, etc i.e. that Ted and Mary Jo were having an affair, that Mary Jo was pregnant, that Ted was drunk the night of the accident.

Jason Clarke is a dead ringer for Ted, while comic actor Ed Helms plays Ted’s cousin/longtime confidant Joe Gargan (a Kennedy family extended member who according to this film, longs to be considered an actual Kennedy but feels like all he is ever asked to do his be Ted’s fixer).  Meanwhile, comedian Jim Gaffigan plays Ted’s other confidant, former U.S. Attorney Paul Markham.

It’s ironic that in this very powerful, dramatic film, an Australian is called on to play an American politician, while two comedians are tapped to play the senator’s associates.  Frankly, to me, this is a sign that Hollywood probably wasn’t thrilled about this movie being made.  While Ed Helms has long been working on his chance to cross over into drama, I doubt Jim Gaffigan, a comic who jokes about how he eats too much and who to date, his most famous movie role is being the “Meow” guy from “Super Troopers” would have had a chance to play a US Attorney/Kennedy colleague unless there wasn’t a line of actors at the studio’s door looking to snatch up the role.

At any rate, I don’t want to get political, but I think we can all agree Tinsel Town is a liberal place.  That puts the film industry in a tough position – make this movie and tell a very interesting story about how there’s a double standard in the law for the rich and powerful…hide the story to protect the reputation of an iconic left-leaning political family dynasty….don’t tell the story and in so doing, ignore the #metoo movement that’s been sweeping over Hollywood, i.e. people demanding that stories of women being hurt by the powerful be told….tell the story and admit that one of the Democratic party’s top senators for many decades was a womanizing lout who got off scot free on a rap that would have left anyone else in prison for life…this was a movie with a lot of ramifications and it’s being made probably didn’t make a lot of powerful people happy.

I’m not giving the right a pass…I’m just saying, this is a story that has been waiting to be told for fifty years.  I remember as a kid whenever Ted Kennedy would come on TV, I would make a joke about his voice, crack a joke about Chappaquiddick, “I err uh left a blond in the err uh pond” and inevitably some adult would tell me to shush because didn’t I think the Kennedy family had suffered enough already?

Yeah, but no one seemed to care about Mary Jo’s suffering…until today, when the media is finally willing to listen to stories about women suffering at the hands of powerful men.  A film that was made 50 years too late to get Mary Jo some justice, but at least it was finally made.

STATUS:  Shelf-worthy.

Tagged , , , ,