Holy Crap 3.5 Readers.
SPOILERS! SPOILERS! SPOILERS!
Did Carol have like a gatling gun shoved up her sleeve to take all those dudes or what?
And what do you think happened to Daryl?
DISCUSS!
Bookshelf Battle
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Tag Archives: walkingdead
Tonight’s Walking Dead
Hey 3.5 Readers.
SPOILERS!!!!!!
What an episode. Very woman-centric. Lots of chicks young and old fighting, scheming and being evil and shit.
I like Alicia Witt. She was Paula last episode and this one. She was on a season of Justified. She just seems very smart and fun and like her last name, witty.
Carol, as usual, is adept at tricking everyone into thinking she’s just a harmless old lady and then she straight up takes everyone down like a gangsta.
There was a suggestion this group might have been good. What do you think? Could there have been info that Rick’s group didn’t know?
Maggie was a badass. Anyone know what accent the lady who plays her has?
Tonight’s Walking Dead
SPOILERS!
Super violent episode tonight. Rick and Co. took on “The Saviors.”
They’d never tangled with this group before, but the Hilltop people had been forced into servitude to them.
Rick and the gang agreed to take out the Saviors in exchange for regular food payments from the Hilltop.
They reason that if they don’t, then the Saviors will eventually attack them.
Obviously, some parallels to today’s world. There are some who argue that it is necessary to take out bad groups, regimes, etc who are wreaking havoc before they get out of control and there are others who say we should mind our own business and don’t attack unless we’re attacked first.
Are preemptive strikes a good or bad idea? Did the group cross the line?
What say you, 3.5 readers?
By the way, JB Smoove is a hilarious guest on tonight’s Talking Dead.
The Walking Dead – Season 6, Episode 9 – “No Way Out”
Hey 3.5 Readers.
The Walking Dead is back!
SPOILER ALERT!
Wow. The general consensus is this is one of the best episodes of the series, perhaps the most emotional one.
We lost some recurring characters. Jessie, Ron, Sam – the whole porch dick family is gone.
Rick’s Valentine’s Day was ruined. He really wanted some Jessie action.
Carl’s eye is gone. Poor Carl.
Father Gabriel had a redemption moment.
The Alexandrians had their stand.
Dale has replaced his crossbow with a rocket launcher.
What say you, 3.5 readers?
This Season of The Walking Dead
Hey nerds,
I haven’t had a chance to write about it and my old pal Zombie Trump has been busy, but I just wanted to ask what everyone thinks about this season. I think its turning out to be one of the better ones so far.
What say you, 3.5 readers?
#31ZombieAuthors – Day 23 Interview – Peter Cawdron – Outsmarting Zombies
FIND THIS ZOMBIE AUTHOR ON:
My guest today is Peter Cawdron, who comes from the land down under. I don’t have to pay the Men At Work a royalty for saying that because Peter is an honest to God Australian zombie enthusiast.
Peter’s the author of the Z is for Zombie series of books which include What We Left Behind and All Our Tomorrows. These books tell the story of teenager Hazel, who in the midst of a zombie apocalypse, searches for Steve, David, and Jane, the only people who ever understood her.
An avid fan of such classic science fiction writers as Philip K. Dick, Arthur C. Clarke and Michael Crichton, Peter is also a prolific science fiction author in his own right.
I wonder if there’s an extra charge to call Australia? Aw screw it, the bill for this phone goes to Alien Jones anyway.
G’day Peter.
NOTE: BOLD=BQB; ITALICS=Peter
Q. I just discovered that my perpetually angry uncle, who I thought never understood me, is in fact, the only person who ever understood me and what I need to make it in the world. Unfortunately, he’s dead, though he visits me in ghost form from time to time. Your protagonist, Hazel, feels like only three people understand her. Is she really that confounding or is it typical teenage “no one gets me” angst?
A. Teenage angst is cliche, and yet there is an element of personal growth we all go through where we’re learning about the world afresh. I don’t know that it stops as an adult, at least, it shouldn’t. It hasn’t for me. I’m always learning, and not just intellectually. Emotional learning is often more important than facts or figures. I think that’s one reason why coming-of-age books have such universal appeal. It’s a chance to re-learn and renew, regardless of how old we may be.
In my novel What We Left Behind and the sequel All Our Tomorrows, we see life through the eyes of a teenager struggling toaccept the end of the world, fighting to make a change. All too often, it is the upcoming generation that is the catalyst for change. Us old farts need to respect that, listen and understand. It’s the youth of today that can change tomorrow, and that’s the message common to my novels as well as books like Hunger Games, Maze Runner, and so many others. Change is good. It’s the status quo that’s scary.
Q. As a zombie fan, I’ve noticed that in most zompoc tales, zombies are never referred to as “zombies.” They’re “walkers” or “the undead” or “creepers” and so on but never zombies. Your characters refer to them as “Zee.” Why is that? Is “zombie” too informal? Will we ever crack open a novel where a writer has a character saying, “Holy crap! It’s a zombie!”
A. Oh, they’re called zombies in What We Left Behind as well as Zee, but Zee makes things more personal, and I think that’s important. Zombie stories are notorious for being impersonal. Survivors are often portrayed as brutal if not more brutal than the zombies themselves, whereas zombie stories are really about survivors. And what is a zombie but a survivor that fell and failed. Zee makes that more poignant, reminding the reader that zombies aren’t simply cannon fodder. To the survivors, they once were as we are, and the term Zee keeps that fresh in mind.
Q. How did you get into the zombie craze?
A. My kids love The Walking Dead, and I enjoy it too, but I get frustrated with the inaccuracies. Gasoline, as an example, has a shelf life of about nine months. Diesel’s a little better, but will be pretty nasty after a couple of years. So at some point everyone’s going to be walking, or riding bicycles or horses. The SUV might look like the ultimate zombie killing machine, but it’s not sustainable, so in All Our Tomorrows, they drive around in a Tesla with the doors stripped off and the seats torn out to keep the weight down, charging the car with solar panels. For me, it’s fun to consider practical stuff like that.
Zombies are dumb, right? So what’s the greatest weapon in the zombie apocalypse? Smarts. I’ve tried to write novels that have smart, unique solutions to the zombie apocalypse rather than relying on shotguns and machetes all the time. Shotguns might work on the zombie in front of you, but the noise is going to bring in a dozen more zombies, while a machete is just plain stupid. It’s going to get stuck every time.
Q. You’re also a sci-fi aficionado. One work of yours that caught my eye is Little Green Men, about a crew of space travelers who set down on a frozen planet and are attacked by, sure enough, little green men. Is a story about trustworthy, non-murderous aliens possible? Does it say anything about us as humans that we have a tendency to think the worst about the possibility of life on other planets?
And by the way, I have a colleague named Alien Jones who is in fact, a little green man. He’s been totally above board thus far, but do you think I should keep an eye on him?
A. Little Green Men is brutal. It’s a homage to Philip K. Dick and has an alienesque feel to it (Alien Jones would love it), but yes, it is possible to write about trustworthy, non-murderous aliens. Anomaly is my best selling novel, having sold over 75,000 copies. Anomaly was my debut novel and even today, a dozen stories down the road, it still outsells everything else I’ve written. If you enjoyed Carl Sagan’s Contact, you’ll love Anomaly.
As for Alien Jones, he’s clearly hampered by a paranoid companion 🙂
Q. On your Amazon page, you talk a bit about the difference between general and “hard” science fiction. Could you explain it for my 3.5 readers?
A. Hard science fiction is a misnomer.
Science fiction shouldn’t be hard to understand or hard and inflexible. There’s merit in keeping scifi as accurate and plausible as possible. There’s always a degree of handwavium in science fiction when authors start projecting their thoughts into the future, but the limitations of concepts like the speed of light actually add to the realism of a story.
As much as I love the Star Trek reboots, I cringe when they ignore common sense. There’s one scene in Star Trek Into Darkness where Kirk is on the Klingon home world some undisclosed number of light years away from Earth, and he calls up Scotty on his handheld communicator. Scotty is in a bar on Earth and answers Kirk’s technical question. To me, that’s a wasted opportunity. Even if Kirk was somewhere within our solar system, say on Mars, Scotty couldn’t have a realtime chat like that, he’d be waiting at least half an hour for a message to arrive. Communication between star systems would be like the letters of the 1700s taking months to years to transit the globe. Star Trek Into Darkness wasted a wonderful opportunity, as instead of taking the lazy, easy way out, the writer could have used that limitation to drive up the tension. Sure, Scotty’s got the answers. But he’s not there, so Kirk has to figure it out on his own and that’s far more rewarding for the audience than watching Kirk being given a get-out-of-jail-free card.
Hard science isn’t difficult, it’s just plausible and believable, and it makes stories more gritty and realistic.
Q. Peter, thanks for taking my call. Before I go, do you have any advice that might help my friends and I survive the East Randomtown Zombie Apocalypse?
A. Think before you act. Remember,
- You’re smart. They’re not.
- They have numbers. You don’t.
Keep those two facts in mind and you’ll do fine. Oh, and keep a copy of What We Left Behind handy, you might find some good tips in there.
BQB’s Zombie Apocalypse Survivor’s Journal – Day 16
“Ms. Fighter! Ms. Fighter! Look!”
Kenny was a red headed, freckle faced boy, about eight years old. He and his friends were, much to VGRF’s dismay, Buildcrafting it up big time.
“I built my very own Roman era city, complete with a working aqueduct!”
“That’s great Ken.”
VGRF leaned in to whisper to me, “I think I’m just going to walk outside and take my chances with the zombies.”
“Looks like they’re already here,” I said, pointing to a dozen kids whose eyes were transfixed on the game. “What is the point of Buildcraft anyway?”
“There is no point,” VGRF said. “It is completely pointless. You just build and build and build some more. UGH! Why won’t you kids go to sleep so I can play Car Thief Mayhem?”
“One might argue that game is equally pointless,” Kenny said. “All you do on Car Thief Mayhem is destroy. At least here, I’m building something.
VGRF’s “I’ve been bested” look was always priceless.
“Shut up and fix your aqueduct, Kenny! Your columns are all crooked!”
Janey, a fourteen year old with a mouthful of braces, nudged Kenny.
“It’s my turn!”
“Fine,” Kenny said as he saved his aqueduct and turned the console over.
Janey popped in a disc marked The Shuffling Living: The Video Game Experience.
The Shuffling Living was the hottest show on television. It followed the adventures of champion zombie hunter Dirk Lane as he and his band of survivors migrated across a zombie infested landscape.
“You’ve got to be kidding me,” VGRF said to Janey. “We’re stuck in the middle of a zombie apocalypse and you’re going to play a video game about a zombie apocalypse?”
“It’s still a good video game!” Janey said.
“What do you do?” VGRF asked.
“There’s some stuff somewhere the group needs but its surrounded by zombies so you have to fight them to get to it,” Janey explained.
“Oh,” VGRF said, exercising her inner critic, “So it’s just like every last episode of that show then?”
“Pretty much,” Janey replied.
“You know we used to watch it every Sunday,” I said.
“Used to being the operative words,” VGRF said. “If I never see another zombie again it’ll be too soon.”
VGRF picked up the case for the game Janey was playing.
“Huh. PG13. I guess it’s ok for you then.”
She read on.
“Play as Dirk Lane and eradicate zombies or play as a zombie and feast on human brains!”
My significant other looked at me.
“This is sick! Who’d want to control a zombie in a video game?”
“That’s a good question,” I said as I whipped out the space phone. “And I know who can answer this…”
“Oh my God,” VGRF said as she snatched the phone away from me. “Stop being such a spotlight hog and let me do another interview already!”
Zombie Trump Reviews the Walking Dead – Season 6, Episode 1 – First Time Again
By: Zombie Trump, Special Guest Reviewer
Hello 3.5 losers. Zombie Trump here, doing Bookshelf Q. Battler one hell of a favor by making a special guest appearance on his pitiful excuse for a blog. Do you know that more people have read the ingredients on the back of those restaurant sugar packets than have read this lousy website?
I’ll tell you, BQB should be puckering up and smooching my rotten, undead derrière because getting me on this site is quite a get indeed.
OK, Battler. Get ready for the highest stats ever on this crap hole.
THIS IS GOING TO BE HUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGEEE!
So the gang is back and they’re broodier and angrier than ever.
LAST SEASON
Rick and Co. have spent the past five seasons surviving the zombie menace so at this point they’re all like “Look at us! We know how to live in the dirt and kill zombies and shit!”
Please. Who cares? What kind of a job is that going to allow you to acquire in today’s market?
Oh, by the way, I’m supposed to say SPOILERS ahead or else a bunch of you goons will whine I ruined your favorite show. Look. There’s no way to ruin this show. Zombies try to eat people. People fight back. Some of the people die occasionally. Other times they don’t. There you go.
So Rick’s crew reached Alexandria last season. Alexandria’s a settlement that has survived since the beginning of the zombie apocalypse, thanks to a local politician and her engineer husband WHO BUILT A WALL to keep out the zombies, thus allowing the survivors behind the wall to live productive, zombie free lives.
Hmmm, I wonder which other zombie candidate in the race for the office of President of All Zombies proposed building a wall? Walls work, people. Ask the Chinese. Have they been invaded by Mongolians lately? No. Thanks to the Great Wall. And Alexandria has been able to keep the zombies out thanks to their wall.
Anyway, rather than congratulate the Alexandrians on their foresight to build an anti-zombie wall, Rick and his hoodlums are all like “Waah waah waah, we fought zombies in the woods and wandered around Georgia for five years, blah blah blah, we know everything.”
Yeah clowns. Maybe you should have known to BUILD AN ANTI-ZOMBIE WALL. Stop demanding that others reward you for your own incompetence, losers.
THIS SEASON
This first episode was some kind of half black and white, half color Tarantino style nonsense where they jumped between the past and the future. I’m not going to lie. For the first half-hour, I thought my zombie television was on the fritz, but I knew that couldn’t be, because I reside at the luxurious Zombie Trump Taj Mahal, where everything is really classy.
The big problem the group faced is that there was some kind of ridiculous zombie dam that was about to break loose and send the zombies on a big charge towards Alexandria.
Zombies tend to have a herd mentality. Few are strong, independent forward thinking zombies like myself, who dare to pledge to make the Zombie Nation great again.
Rick’s big plan is to lead these zombies on a zombie parade, manipulating them down a path through sounds and (hey what do you know) WALLS designed to keep the undead from straying.
Wait a minute. So zombies are that easy to control? Just put a damn hill billy on a motorcycle and they’ll go anywhere you want them to? Doesn’t that kind of negate the last five seasons? Why doesn’t Daryl just lead all the undead off a cliff and save the world already then?
Seems like a big plot hole to this zombie. But then again, it is a show about people who fight zombies so I suppose you have to suspend disbelief a bit to enjoy it.
Just like how Bookshelf Q. Battler suspends disbelief about how sucktastic his blog is so he can bring himself to keep blogging anyway.
Enjoy your hits running off the rails, Battler. I’m off to dine on some first class brains at Chez Zombie Trump, the number one eatery in the world for zombies. It’s so extravagant it makes all other zombie eateries look like the Outback Steakhouse.
Zombie Trump out.
#31ZombieAuthors – Day 14 Interview – Kate L. Mary – Nerds vs. Hunks
FIND THIS ZOMBIE AUTHOR ON:
Today’s guest is Kate L. Mary, author of the Broken World series. Follow protagonist Vivian Thomas on the road in the midst of zombie mayhem as she and her DD’s convince a duo of redneck brothers to give her a ride to California so she can locate the daughter she gave up for adoption.
A stay-at-home mother and Air Force wife, Kate and her family have lived in Georgia, Mississippi, South Carolina, California and Oklahoma.
Her Amazon author page states:
“Kate prefers nerdy, non-traditional heroes who can make you laugh to hunky pieces of man-meat…”
So in other words, there’s a distinct chance I might be able to convince her to become the Bookshelf Battle Blog’s 4.5th reader.
Hello Kate. Thanks for taking my call on the space phone.
NOTE: BQB=BOLD; KATE=ITALICS
Q. Let’s talk about the role of trust in a zombie apocalypse. Sometimes a disaster can bring out the best in people. Other times, it can bring out the worst. Unfortunately, you never know who you’re dealing with until it’s too late. My group and I, having just located a survivor camp operated by a retired used car salesman/former television extra, are having trust issues. I think it’s a pretty sweet set-up. My girlfriend thinks we should run. Naturally I thought about Vivian, who makes the tough decision to trust a pair of redneck brothers on her quest to find her daughter. Can anyone ever be fully trusted in a zombie apocalypse?
A. Trusting people during normal times can be tough, but when it comes to a lawless world it’s an even bigger gamble. I know a lot of people hold the belief that humans are basically good, but I wholeheartedly disagree. People are full of bad intentions, and too often the only thing keeping them from acting on those intentions are the consequences. Take away the threat of punishment, and the world will very quickly get a lot darker.
In the case of the used car salesman/former television extra, I’d have to say I’m with your girlfriend. I know the idea of a used car salesman being sleazy and underhanded is just a stereotype, but throw the role of television extra on top of that and every warning bell in my head goes off. This person spent his free time pretending to be someone else on a regular basis. What makes you think that just because the world has ended, he’s stopped pretending?
Q. As a fan of zombie books, movies, TV shows, etc., I’ve noticed that whenever a group of people happen upon a place offering shelter and safety, it’s usually some kind of trick. Someone inevitably ends up robbed, beaten, killed, sold into slavery, chopped up into lunch meat or what have you. Maybe that’s why my better half is so jittery.
As a noted zombie author, can you settle a debate that’s long ranged in the world of zombie fandom? When survivors happen upon a settlement operated by seemingly nice people, should their response be, “Feets don’t fail me now!” or “Thank you for your hospitality. I think I will join you!”
A. In a disaster like this, the idea that there are no good people left in the world has me thinking one thing: If that’s true, why go on? If you’re a good person just trying to survive, you have to assume there are other people out there with good intentions as well. But trusting someone shouldn’t be your first inclination or you’re liable to get robbed, beaten, killed, sold into slavery, or chopped up into lunchmeat. I think it’s important to give off a “thank you for your hospitality” vibe while keeping your eyes open for anything suspicious, much like Rick and crew did when they first arrived at Terminus at the end of season four of The Walking Dead. You have to keep hope alive or you’ll find yourself turning into the very monster you’re afraid to run into, but you need to be smart about it as well.
Q. I’m led to believe you prefer laughable nerds over hunky pieces of man meat. Naturally, as a poindexterish proprietor of a book blog that caters to 3.5 readers, who currently finds himself knee deep in a zombie apocalypse, I’m intrigued. My ensuing inquiries are:
Q1) Is that actually true or is that just something that women say before they make a beeline for the hunky man meat?
A. It’s actually true! While hunky pieces of man meat are great to look at, that was never the type of man I dated, and it definitely won’t be who I rely on when the zombie apocalypse hits. Strength will only get you so far before a horde of zombies decides they want to feast on a meal of muscles, but intelligence will keep you going. And a sense of humor will not only keep you from losing your mind, but give you something to keep going for. While I do share the common problem of most female Walking Dead viewers—a love of Daryl Dixon—I have to admit that I’m in major awe of Glenn Rhee. I wouldn’t mind teaming up with him at the end of the world!
Q2) Point of clarification: Are we talking about a full blown, genuine, bonafide Star Wars toy owning geek despite being an adult type of nerd or the Hollywood version of a nerd, which is usually just a hunky piece of man meat that someone in wardrobe whipped a pair of glasses on? (A hunk in nerd’s clothing, if you will.)
A. I’m all about the adorable kind of nerd. Star Wars toys aren’t a must, but they also aren’t unwelcome—I own a few nerdy Walking Dead toys myself. My husband is a toy collecting nerd as well. For Father’s Day the last two years I got him Simpsons Lego sets. They are currently assembled and on display above our fireplace.
Q3) What is it about a nerdy/non-traditional hero that intrigues you?
A. I think it’s the unexpected. Seeing someone who didn’t think much of himself before the apocalypse rises to the challenge and becomes an important part of a group’s survival. Anyone who looks at a “hunky” guy will assume he’s going to be able to take care of himself, but it’s the people who surprise even themselves who are the most enjoyable to root for.
Q4) Who are some of your favorite nerdy, non-traditional, non-hunky heroes?
A. Glen Rhee of course. The evolution of his character over the last five seasons has been incredible to watch. Every now and then I like to turn on an episode from season one of The Walking Dead just to compare the characters, and seeing how much he has grown since then is mind-blowing.
I was also a huge fan of Chuck when it was on. Watching Chuck fumble his way through assignments was adorable, but seeing how much he had changed by the end of the series was even more fun.
Q. The Broken World series is in Amazon’s top one hundred when it comes to post-apocalyptic and dystopian 
fiction. What’s your secret to bringing so many readers into your world?
A. Honestly, I think it had a lot to do with timing. I wrote the first three books a few years ago, but sat on them for a bit while agents and editors took their time considering publishing Broken World. By the time I finally got around to putting the first book out myself, The Walking Dead had reached the status of TV phenomenon, and it’s popularity really helped the series take off. The fact that it’s a great series—I never get tried of rereading these books!—and so different from a lot of zombie books out there helped even more.
Q. What inspired you to take your ideas and turn them into books that zombie fanatics the world over can enjoy?
A. The Walking Dead, of course. I’ve always loved post-apocalyptic stories, especially zombie stuff, but the sudden popularity of The Walking Dead helped form a story in my head that I just couldn’t get rid of. I almost didn’t write it as a zombie novel, though. If you do any kind of research on what editors/publishers are looking for, you’ll discover the sad fact that they do not want zombie fiction. They say there’s no market for it, which is just crazy—especially now! I wrote the first chapter of Broken World as a post-apocalyptic novel similar to The Stand, but without the religious undertones. But only one chapter in and I changed my mind, deciding to take a risk and write the zombie novel I’d been thinking about for months. Broken World was the result, and I’m so glad I took that leap.
Q. Kate, thanks for stopping by, and especially for enduring my inquisition vis a vis nerds vs. hunks. Before I hang up the space phone, do you have any last minute advice that could help my friends and I brave the zombie apocalypse?
A. Don’t lose hope! It’s the one thing that will get you killed faster than a horde of zombies. If you don’t have some kind of hope for the future, you won’t fight as hard or run as fast. You’ll find yourself wishing that you never wake up when you lay down to sleep at night. If you don’t have any hope that you will be able to find a safe place or that the horror will one day come to an end, it won’t be long before the only end you can imagine is death.
Thanks so much for having me, and I hope you and your group find a safe place to ride out the worst of the zombie apocalypse!
Sanctuary in a Zombie Apocalypse – Stay or Run?
It’s one of the oldest zombie apocalypse tropes going.
A plucky band of survivors happen across a makeshift utopia, a community safe from zombie attacks.
They’re invited in, made to feel welcome, given a purpose, a chance at a new life…and then…BAM!!!
The old double-cross. They’re betrayed, killed, chopped up into a stew, you name it.
BQB thinks Fort Hauser is a pretty sweet deal and wants to stay.
VGRF thinks its all just a little too perfect and wants to head for the hills.
Who’s right? Who’s wrong.
3.5 readers, BQB is counting on you. Advise him in the comments as to whether Fort Hauser is haven or a hoax.
Bookshelf Battle 