I’m Crazy BQB and my book prices are insane! My latest book is priced to move and all virtual copies must go!
3.5 readers, today through Tuesday, you can get a FREE copy of my short story, The End is Nigh, about a wacky conspiracy theorist who stumbles upon something real when a certain government agency that may or may not exist starts chasing him.
Should you get a FREE copy? Yes, because it is a FREE copy and FREE stuff is awesome.
Do you need to read it if you get it for FREE? Yes, you should because it’s funny and witty and awesome like all my books and I say that with great humility but if you don’t want to, that’s fine. It’s a FREE country which coincidentally, my book is also FREE.
Hey 3.5 readers. This weekend, you can get my book, The Second Death (A BQB Twisted Short) for FREE, which means you don’t have to pay for it.
That’s right. You can save your money and spend it on comic books and bubble gum instead, or better yet, put it in the bank and let it compound interest for 1,000 years so you can become uber rich. It’s your money. Do want you want with it. The key here is you don’t have to spend it on my book, because my book is totes FREE!
Inspired by the poem “The To-be Forgotten” by Thomas Hardy, The Second Death is about a fame obsessed wacko who spends an entire day hatching outlandish schemes, all in an effort to attract the media attention he so desperately craves…and the FBI agents who track him down.
3.5 readers…Valentine’s Day is tomorrow so if you’re a big cheapo skinflint, you could get a free copy of this book for your sweetie…and then enjoy bachelorhood because no self-respecting woman wants a book for V-Day. You could get her a free copy of this book plus a dozen roses and a diamond necklace and so on. That would probably work out better.
I’m Crazy BQB and my prices are insane! My book “Freefall” is priced to move!
ZERO percent interest! ZERO percent APR! ZERO money down! Just click the link below and GRAB YOUR FREE COPY TODAY! BAH HA HA!
Yes, my price on this book is so low that if it were a limbo stick, a rattle snake wouldn’t be able to limbo under it, that’s how incredibly low my price is! My price is so insane I’d better confirm my reservation at the funny farm! BAH HA HA!
But seriously, 3.5 readers. This is a good, short story about a man who goes skydiving only to find out his parachute has been sabotaged. He’s only left with a few minutes to figure out how to save himself and whodunnit.
So, if you could grab a FREE copy, I’d appreciate it. If you want to read it too, that’s even better and if you want to read it AND leave a review, that’s even more better, better-er? Whatever. Get a FREE COPY FOR FREE BECAUSE IT IS FREE!
3.5 readers, my twisted short, When Superheroes Quit, is totes free this week, so be sure to grab a copy and find out what happens to Horrendous City when The Righteous Champion quits being a superhero to focus on his budding pop music career.
My book is FREE! So go on over to Amazon and get it today!
Maybe he’s a captive. Maybe he’s a werewolf. All the hero of this story knows is that he wishes this was someone else’s problem.
It’s the 1950s and down on his luck door to door salesman Chauncy Gladwell has been thrown out of his house by a wife tired of his gullible nature. The old boy has a long track record of falling for every scam in the book, to the point where his savings have been ravaged by every two bit con artist in town.
On the day when Chauncy vows to put himself over anyone with a problem, he stumbles across…a young man with a problem. While on a routine sales call to hawk a Suck-O-Matic vacuum cleaner, Chauncy meets Sam, an 18-year old lad who has been locked up in the lady of the house’s basement.
His grandmother, Ludmilla, a crusty old battle axe if there ever was one, says Sam is danger of turning into a werewolf, and thus must be kept in quarantine until the full moon passes.
Sam tells a different story, namely, that his granny is bonkers, and that she’s just trying to stop him from joining the Army and eloping with his high school sweetheart.
What a conundrum. If Chauncy releases Sam, he runs the risk of unleashing a monster upon the world. But if he does nothing and leaves, won’t it eat him up inside, to know that he saw someone being held hostage and did nothing?
Will our unlikely hero save the day? Is there a day to even be saved? Who can be trusted? And what about his pledge to his wife, that he will never again be taken in by someone with a sob story?
Gather around under the full moon and crack open the fourth installment of BQB’s Twisted Shorts. Do you like “The Twilight Zone?” Do you like “The Outer Limits?” Do you like “Black Mirror?” Well, BQB doesn’t have the budget to make shows as awesome as those, but his self-published journey toward creating an episodic anthology has begun.
Totally important announcement, so drop everything you are doing and pay me your rapt attention.
No, that’s not rapt enough. More…more…more…alright, your attention is now sufficiently rapt.
My three short stories, now on Amazon, part of BQB’s Twisted Shorts series, have been priced down to 99 cents.
Is that a reflection of what they are worth? No. I’d charge a million bucks a piece if I could but I don’t think anyone would pay a million bucks for any book.
I’m just testing the waters to see if going cheaper works. We’ll see how it goes. If it doesn’t work, I’ll eventually go back to a higher price.
Here you go. When Superheroes Quit. 99 cents.
Check this out. The One That Got Away:
And finally:
I can’t believe how cheap my shorts are, 3.5 readers. Do you want cheap shorts? Then buy my cheap shorts today!
What’s that 3.5 readers? You are Elon Musk? You are super rich and able to drive a Tesla on the moon and you don’t want to get my book for FREE?
Well, that’s ok. If you are rich then you can buy it tomorrow.
But for those of you who are not super rich space tycoons, my book is FREE today and it would be a big help if you grab a FREE copy by the end of the day. I have given away 88 copies so far so it would be awesome to make it an even 100.
Ahh, the joys of writing where giving away free copies can be considered a success.
You’ll enjoy it, 3.5 readers. It’s a quick read. It is poignant and sad and it even has a twist of dark humor here and there. And if you don’t want to read it, you don’t have to because there isn’t going to be a pop quiz or anything.
My FREE promotion for The One That Got Away is ongoing until August 10.
Check out these stats:
It’s currently #94 in Single Authors Short Stories and #51 in Dystopian Science Fiction (Note these stats are for books that are free in these genres. I’m not number 1 in paid dystopian sci fi. That’s George Orwell. Look out, George. Big Brother and I are comin’ at ya.
Anyway, if you could grab your free copy so it keeps climbing the charts, I’d appreciate. A review would help even more.
Check it out, 3.5:
What’s it about?
It’s basically a case of be careful what you wish for. Evan Brooks spends twenty years on a bar stool, drinking and complaining about Lisa, the fiance who broke up with him. A mysterious stranger gives him a trial run of a version of the world where Lisa stayed.
Unfortunately, Lisa and Evan married…and their son grew up to become the most ruthless dictator the world has ever seen.
Ever feel bad when something didn’t go your way? Maybe…don’t…because the world has a funny way of making the right things happen and when people try to push back against the unseen hand of fate, the results are rarely good.
Bookshelf Battle 