Category Archives: BQB’s Twisted Shorts

BQB on Freebooksy

Hey 3.5 readers.

Your old pal, BQB here.

I bought a Freebooksy promotion, which ran yesterday, and wanted to tell you all about it, seeing as how it was a good experience.

It was for Freefall, my short story about a man who goes on a skydiving trip, only to jump out of the plane and find that his parachute has been sabotaged:

In the past, I have had moderate success with Facebook ads. Sometimes they would translate to 10 or 20 free copies. At times, I have given away approximately 100. That was the highest and I thought that was something.

Yesterday, thanks to Freebooksy, I gave away a mind boggling 1,337 copies in one day!!! Ergo, I am sold on their services. When you buy a promotion, you can plan it for a specific day. They will list your book as free on their website for the day and will send it in their email to their subscribers for that day.

Makes sense, right? If you use Facebook ads, you might reach a lot of people, but out of those, maybe a handful will actually click on the link, and an even smaller amount will actually bother to get a free copy.

Meanwhile, Freebooksy subscribers are serious readers with a passion for the written word. They have signed up for these emails so they can be notified when it is time to snatch up free books. Thus, unless something changes, I foresee myself focusing on Freebooksy in the future as my go to site for advertising when one of my books is free.

Of course, we want to transition to the point where we actually get paid. Rarely happens to me, but I am still relatively new to self-publishing. Part of the problem is you have to collect the so-called “social proof” i.e. you have to rack up positive reviews. I did receive one positive review yesterday thanks to Freebooksy. I thought maybe I’d receive more but one thing I have noticed is sometimes people will get a free copy and then they’ll come back a week, or two or a month later and buy a book or leave a review or a rating. It takes time for people to read your book. They grab your book when it is free but then it might sit on their virtual shelf for awhile before they find time to read it.

I did notice a number of people on Goodreads listed it as a book they have or have read or want to read, etc.

Overall, a positive experience so far. As of this morning, the free copies have tapered off to 48 for today as of the time of this post, but that’s still a lot more in one day that I am used to.

Oh! Freefall also ended up being ranked #2 in 90 minute Literature and Short Fiction reads, #2 in Single Author Short Stories and #2 in 90 Minute Mystery, Thriller and Suspense Short Reads. It is now #131 in the Free Kindle store.

That last one? I have to assume if you can make it into the Top 100 Free, you’d get a lot of free book grabs, so if you 3.5 readers want to grab your free copy and put me over the top, I would appreciate it.

Seriously, what else were you going to do today? Cut your toenails? Wash your hair? Mow your lawn? You can take less than one minute to grab a free copy and be able to go to bed tonight secure in the knowledge that you actually achieved something awesome, i.e. you helped Bookshelf Q Battler inch his way toward the Top 100 Free on Amazon.

Thanks for listening, 3.5 readers. Oh and if you are a self-publisher and were wondering about the cost, it cost me $90 and I consider it $90 well spent. You can go to Freebooksy.com and see the prices for various genres, some of which are lower. It’s a good deal. If you want to do it for one of your books, I’d recommend going to their site to make sure the day you want isn’t already sold out, and then pick a day and set your book to be free on that day and voila, free books.

Will you have similar results? Eh, I can’t say for sure. I mean, look at that cover. It is pretty awesome. And the story is pretty great too, if I do say so myself. You still need to bring your A game to your writing and book production but I would assume you’ll still see an uptick in free copies.

Thank you, Freebooksy.

One more note – Freebooksy also offers Bargainbooksy, where if your book is priced low enough (I forget how low it has to be) then you can also buy a promotion on that. I haven’t tried that yet. I generally find it is like pulling teeth to get people to actually buy books, though I heard a rumor it does happen if you keep putting the time and effort in. Maybe I’ll try that someday. If you have tried Bargainbooksy and want to share your experience, please do so in the comments.

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GET A FREE BOOK – FOR FREE!

I’m Crazy BQB and my prices are insane! My book “Freefall” is priced to move!

ZERO percent interest! ZERO percent APR! ZERO money down! Just click the link below and GRAB YOUR FREE COPY TODAY! BAH HA HA!

Yes, my price on this book is so low that if it were a limbo stick, a rattle snake wouldn’t be able to limbo under it, that’s how incredibly low my price is! My price is so insane I’d better confirm my reservation at the funny farm! BAH HA HA!

But seriously, 3.5 readers. This is a good, short story about a man who goes skydiving only to find out his parachute has been sabotaged. He’s only left with a few minutes to figure out how to save himself and whodunnit.

So, if you could grab a FREE copy, I’d appreciate it. If you want to read it too, that’s even better and if you want to read it AND leave a review, that’s even more better, better-er? Whatever. Get a FREE COPY FOR FREE BECAUSE IT IS FREE!

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The Second Death – Latest BQB’s Twisted Shorts Cover

Hey 3.5 readers.

The sixth installment of BQB’s Twisted Shorts is on the way. This short story will be about a man who is obsessed with “The Second Death” i.e. the concept first introduced in Thomas Hardy’s poem, “The To-be forgotten.” – namely, the idea then when your body goes, that’s your first death, and then when the last person who remembers you dies, that’s your second.

Sad, no?

Some subtle dark humor on the cover. Everyone at the funeral is glued to their cell phones, having forgotten the deceased already.

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Merry Christmas, Happy New Year and GET A FREE WEREWOLF BOOK!

Hey 3.5 readers.

Some thoughts:

#1 – Merry Belated Christmas. Sorry I did not stop to wish all 3.5 of you a Merry Christmas when it was Christmas. I have been busy. My bad. I hope it was a good one.

#2 – Happy New Year. I wished you a Happy New Year on time.

#3 – GET A FREE WEREWOLF BOOK!

Yes, one of BQB’s Twisted Shorts, “Quarantine” is totes free. That means you don’t have to spend any money. You probably just spent a lot, what with running up your credit cards to buy all those expensive gifts and gadgets that your loved ones didn’t need and honestly, aren’t going to make them appreciate you anymore anyway.

So, get yourself a FREE book. Remember, it’s free. Just go to the link below, get your free copy and if the mood strikes, feel free to leave me a review.

FREE! HA HA HA! TOTALLY FREE! MY PRICES ARE INSANE I’M GIVING THESE BOOKS AWAY!!!
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A Thanksgiving Present For My 3.5 Readers

Happy Thanksgiving, 3.5 readers.

To show my appreciation for all the reading you have done on this fine blog, I set one of my twisted shorts, “The End is Nigh” to be FREE today and all throughout the Thanksgiving weekend.

That’s right. It’s totally FREE and you don’t have to pay anything because it’s FREE. Writers should never make a dime and should be totally punished for getting into such a fanciful, pie in the sky occupation and therefore, this book is FREE and you won’t have to pay a cent because again, it’s totes FREE!!!

What’s it about? It’s about Harry, a crazy old vagrant who stands in the middle of a subway station, ringing his bell and shouting out crazy conspiracy theories. Most people think he’s a wacko or a performance artist/impromptu stand-up comedian. However, when video of his antics goes viral, one government agency is not laughing. What has Harry stumbled into?

This is a short read, perfect for distracting you. You can totally sit on the couch and read this while pretending to listen to your Aunt Gertie’s boysenberry nut bread recipe or while your Uncle Fred is critiquing all of your life’s choices even though he hasn’t earned a paycheck since the Carter administration. (There was a president named Carter, millennial readers, look it up.)

Don’t have time to get your FREE book today? There’s always tomorrow, when all the family is gone and you know you should get back on your diet but damn it, you need one last piece of pie and some turkey and stuffing and you know, you could put that all into one sandwich and boy would that ever be a tall sandwich but damn it, it’s going to be delicious.

Don’t have time tomorrow? It’s still FREE this weekend and when you wake up well rested from your food coma, you might consider leaving me a nice review…or at this rate, even a terrible review. Just some sort of evidence that someone got to the end of it and had a reaction, be it good, bad or indifferent.

Get your FREE book for FREE today!!!

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GET A FREE BOOK – FOR FREE!!!

3.5 readers, my twisted short, When Superheroes Quit, is totes free this week, so be sure to grab a copy and find out what happens to Horrendous City when The Righteous Champion quits being a superhero to focus on his budding pop music career.

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GET A FREE BOOK – FOR FREE!!!

FREE is better than paying, 3.5 readers.

No, really. It’s fine. I didn’t want to get paid. Making money is for losers. I just want to put a smile on your face with a free book.

So go on. Grab a copy of my new book, Freefall (A FREE BOOK WITH FREE IN THE TITLE) for FREE!

That’s right. It is FREE for the next 5 days.

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Buy My New Book – Freefall

Hey 3.5 readers.

Seriously, isn’t that a great cover?

The latest installment of BQB’s Twisted Shorts is now available on Amazon.

The blurb:

When amateur skydiver Larry Rutledge takes his first jump out of a perfectly good airplane only to find his primary and backup ripcords have been sabotaged, he’ll have five minutes and 13,500 feet to figure out how to save his life…if he can. If there’s any time leftover, will he be able to solve the mystery and identify the parachute saboteur? Will it even matter if he doesn’t survive?

A tale of money, an illicit affair, thrills and suspense awaits you in this, the fifth installment of BQB’s Twisted Shorts. Do you like “The Twilight Zone?” Do you like “The Outer Limits?” Do you like “Black Mirror?” Well, BQB doesn’t have the budget to make shows as awesome as those, but his self-published journey toward creating an episodic anthology has begun.

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Freefall Cover

Hey 3.5 readers.

My next installment of BQB’s Twisted Shorts is about an average schmuck who goes skydiving for the first time, only to find his primary and backup cords aren’t working.

With 5 minutes before he hits the pavement, he needs to figure out how to save himself, if he can. Also, foul play is suspected, so will he be able to figure out who sabotaged his parachute and why?

Here it is. The cover for BQB’s Twisted Shorts – Volume 1 – Issue 5 – Freefall.

I think this is the best of the 5 covers. The other 5 were great but this, wow, I mean, if you’re browsing through a bookshelf and see this cover, you want to open it up and find out what happens to this guy, don’t you?

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GET A FREE BOOK!

Hey 3.5 readers.

My book is FREE! So go on over to Amazon and get it today!

Maybe he’s a captive. Maybe he’s a werewolf. All the hero of this story knows is that he wishes this was someone else’s problem.

It’s the 1950s and down on his luck door to door salesman Chauncy Gladwell has been thrown out of his house by a wife tired of his gullible nature. The old boy has a long track record of falling for every scam in the book, to the point where his savings have been ravaged by every two bit con artist in town.

On the day when Chauncy vows to put himself over anyone with a problem, he stumbles across…a young man with a problem. While on a routine sales call to hawk a Suck-O-Matic vacuum cleaner, Chauncy meets Sam, an 18-year old lad who has been locked up in the lady of the house’s basement.

His grandmother, Ludmilla, a crusty old battle axe if there ever was one, says Sam is danger of turning into a werewolf, and thus must be kept in quarantine until the full moon passes.

Sam tells a different story, namely, that his granny is bonkers, and that she’s just trying to stop him from joining the Army and eloping with his high school sweetheart.

What a conundrum. If Chauncy releases Sam, he runs the risk of unleashing a monster upon the world. But if he does nothing and leaves, won’t it eat him up inside, to know that he saw someone being held hostage and did nothing?

Will our unlikely hero save the day? Is there a day to even be saved? Who can be trusted? And what about his pledge to his wife, that he will never again be taken in by someone with a sob story?

Gather around under the full moon and crack open the fourth installment of BQB’s Twisted Shorts. Do you like “The Twilight Zone?” Do you like “The Outer Limits?” Do you like “Black Mirror?” Well, BQB doesn’t have the budget to make shows as awesome as those, but his self-published journey toward creating an episodic anthology has begun.

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