Tag Archives: nyc

Madame Tussaud’s New York City Part Two

So many celebrities so little time.


Johnny Depp – usually needs to be Jack Sparrow, Willy Wonka, or the Mad Hatter to be recognizable.


I’ll be there for you…


Anne Hathaway – hot and smart, a double threat I could never please.

Morgan Freeman narrated as Anne rejected me.

“I don’t believe in all my years I had ever seen such an epic rejection.”


Mummy.


Hitler…oh no, wait, Charlie Chaplin.


John Wayne, pilgrims.


Yippy ki yay.


No Lucy you can’t-a play at the club.


Sit in Don Draper’s chair.


They had a virtual reality Ghostbusters game. VR is here, 3.5.


He slimed me.


Hee hee!


Don’t make me close one more door, I don’t want to hurt anymore.

RIP Whitney.


Crap I forgot to find out if this was Venus or Serena. I will guess Serena.


Float like a butterfly…


Jeter.


She needs a wax meat dress.


Puffy taught me everything I know about being a media mogul.


I wanted there to be a wax Toto.


Madame Tussaud herself.

You know, 3.5 readers, it’s never too late. Madame Tussaud lived in obscurity until age 41, when she started going on tour with her wax creations in 1802. She even survived a shipwreck while sailing with her figures to Ireland.

Chase that dream, 3.5.

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BQB Does Madame Tussaud’s New York City

Celebrities.

We love them. We worship them.

Alas, though we rarely, if ever, get to meet them, Madame Tussaud’s legendary wax figures give us the next best thing.

To my surprise, visitors are encouraged to to touch (I refrained from honking wax celebrity boobs) and to take pictures.

Madame Tussaud’s has definitely embraced the selfie generation as the masses love taking pics with their favorite wax celebs and posting them on social media.

Here are some of BQB’s faves:


“I’m wax Regis and I’m out of control!”


Kim Kardashian – the madam had to use a whole helluvalot of wax to craft that baronka donk.


Scarlett Johansson – I offered to buy this figure, not for perverted reasons, but because sometimes Video Game Rack Fighter goes away on business and I get ever so lonely.

OK so for perverted reasons.


Bleh!


I’m not sure who this man is but he was WAY more into the Scarlett Johansson figure than I was. 


Not gonna lie. Teenage me would have sprayed his shorts. Come to think of it, thirties me needs to change his undies.

Moving on…


Work, work, work, work, work. Sigh, Madam T wouldn’t sell me RiRi either.


 This is how we do dee doo.

I didn’t offer to buy her. I didn’t think I could handle it.


Jenna Marbles – this one warmed my usually otherwise cold heart, 3.5 readers.

No agents, auditions, or lucky breaks. Jenna hit it big with her YouTube videos.

To the best of my knowledge she’s the first Internet celebrity to be so honored.

Maybe Madam T will put a wax self-publisher on display one day?

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BQB in NYC – Cirque du Soleil: Paramour (Or, BQB Reviews a Broadway Play)

Wow 3.5 readers.

I knew if I kept plugging away at this blog I’d eventually hit the big time.

After reviewing a ton of movies for 3.5 readers I’m now reviewing a Broadway play for 3.5 readers.

Sadly, I couldn’t take a picture of the production but here is a terrible photo of some naked golden people who adorn the stage inside the Lyric Theater.

Art! I love it. I wish I looked this good naked.


FYI these naked peeps are way taller in person.

3.5 readers, if you’ve ever seen a Cirque du Soleil show, then you know it is an artistic circus combining stunts, acrobatics, and music. No elephants. 

However, there are sometimes some artistic high faluting clowns, though none in this show.

This Broadway version adds one more thing – a plot!

In the Golden age of Hollywood, a down on his luck director discovers an up and coming actress. He makes her a smash. She revives his career. 

They fall in love but the kindhearted songwriter she came to LA with isn’t going to give up that easily.

#lovetriangle

You’ve got people flying around and doing tricks and stunts and backflips and shit.

Totally awesome 3.5 readers. Highly recommend it.

Until next time, this is big time Broadway critic BQB signing off.

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BQB in NYC – Broadway

Chicago in New York City.

#mindboggled

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BQB in NYC – Freedom Tower – 9/11 Memorial Museum – One World Observatory


Howdy 3.5 Readers,

Your old pal BQB here.

The Big Apple. The big..I don’t know…does New York City have any other nicknames?

Recently, I visited the Freedom Tower and had the chance to tour the 9/11 Memorial Museum.

At the museum, you can see preserved parts of the original World Trade Center and foundation, pieces of wreckage, materials saved from the scene, photos, timelines, videos etc.
It makes me sad the Twin Towers are gone but I’m glad they built this to keep future generations remembering what happened.

Finally, I had the chance to check out the observatory at the top of the Freedom Tower.

What a view, 3.5 readers:

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BQB in NYC

Happy Saturday 3.5 readers.

Like Jack Kerouac, I’m on the road, only with much less style and self-reflection.

With Count Krakovich, Asshat Vampire and Schecky Blargfeld, Zombie Comedian holding down the fort (God help us), I’m free to wander.

What’s your favorite thing to do in New York City, 3.5?

I had a chance to check out Times Square. 

Grown man in a baby costume. Adults in off brand super hero costumes. Scantily clad ladies with “I Love NY” on their booty cheeks. (I only looked so I could give a full, thorough report because I go the extra mile for my 3.5 readers.)

BQB in Times Square:

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The Writer’s Battle – What Can We Learn From Pizza Rat?

Holy Crap.  Will you 3.5 readers drop what you’re doing and look at this little jerk?

This rat has got to be the last true believer of the American Dream, let me tell you.

Look at him!

Other rats see a slice of pizza.  Maybe they’ll take a bite.  Maybe they’ll push it a little, get tired, and scurry away.

But here this little schmuck is, carrying this piece of pizza (WHICH IS BIGGER THAN HE IS) down a flight of stairs, one step at a time, presumably in an attempt to cart it off to his rat lair to feed his rat wife and rat children.

God bless you, Pizza Rat.  You’ve made me believe again.  Shit, let’s elect this rat president.

What can writers learn from Pizza Rat?

  • Writing is hard work.  It’s one thing to think about doing it, but only determination and sheer will gets it done.
  • When others shrug their shoulders and give up, you get in there and get that pizza!  Other people give up on writing all the time.  By keeping at it, you’re doing better than all the other writers, just like this rat did better than all the other rats.  You see any other rats out there becoming a viral video star?  I think not.
  • Success comes one step at a time.  Get the pizza slice down one step.  Then another step.  Then another one.  Don’t skip steps. This furry little contagion infested dynamo look at the stairs and cry, “Oh my God!  Too many steps!  I give up!”  No, damn it, he took his slice down one step at a time.  Unfortunately, the video cut short and it does appear like he abandoned his slice at one point, but I like to think that he got nervous around the humans and went back for his dinner once the coast was clear.
  • The same thing goes for your writing.  You start your blog.  You think, “Oh my God!  That other blog has thousands of readers!  I only have 3.5!  SO WHAT?  You get in there and you entertain the ever loving shit out of your adoring 3.5 readers, just as I do every day.  I’ve dragged my pizza/blog down the 3.5 readers step.  One day I’ll drag it down the 100 readers step.  Then the 200 readers step.  Before you know it I’ll be back at my rat lair, chomping on my pizza, or rather, enjoying an audience of a thousand readers.
  • Apply the Pizza Rat model to your daily word count.  Don’t be like one of those lazy ass rats who looks at a pizza, shouts, “Too big!  No thanks!” and scurry off with an empty belly.  Don’t look at your computer screen and go, “A hundred thousand words!  I’ll never type that much!  I’ll just give up on my dream!”  No.  Be like Pizza Rat.  Type a few words today.  A few more tomorrow.  After awhile, you’ll have one delicious novel.

Patience.  Determination.  Guts.  Glory.  Be strong enough to do the work others are too weak to even try.

God damn it, Pizza Rat, if I were a hot she-rat I’d be so turned on I’d have a million of your pizza rat babies and send them out to spread the plague all over the five boroughs.

So remember, 3.5 readers/aspiring writers, today, your writing career might make you feel like a tiny rat and success will appear as far away as the bottom of a long ass stairwell.  But go slow, take it one step at a time, and before you know it, you’ll be feasting on cheesy, gooey success.

Pizza Rat 4-Eva!

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