THE TRAINEE: The Yeti
OCCUPATION: International War Criminal, Fuzzy Snow Monster, BQB’s Mortal Enemy, Currently Detained for Crimes Against BQB HQ
HEIGHT: 10’0″
CURRENT WEIGHT: 1,000 lbs.
HEALTHY WEIGHT FOR A TEN FOOT TALL YETI: 800 lbs (verified by Dr. Hugo Von Science, Distinguished Professor of Science at the Advanced Science Institute of Science University)
WEIGHT LOSS GOAL: 200 lbs. Fit nerd will consult Dr. Hugo as to what a healthy time frame would be for a Yeti to lose that much weight. Obviously losing too much too fast would be unwise. He may need to even bring Alien Jones in on this.
ROAR! I demand tacos! ROAR!
THE TRAINER: Fit Nerd
WHO IS HE: Once topping the scales at a point where he was just one stop through the Drive-Thru away from spending the rest of his life on a Little Rascal scooter, Orville Kerplotsky changed his life by dedicating himself to a healthy diet and regular exercise. He wrote a book about his experience and called it, Fit Nerd. In it, he outlines his journey back to good health and how he made exercise easier by streaming Dr. Who while walking on a treadmill.
ARE WE DEALING WITH THE ACTUAL FIT NERD? – No. The real Orville is chilling in Malibu in a hot tub in Malibu with a bunch of supermodels who pretend to love listening to him babble about his theories vis a vis the good doctor. Concerned about the Yeti’s health, BQB purchased a copy of Fit Nerd’s book, put it on his magic shelf and the tiny version of Orson that popped out has agreed to train the Yeti.
WHY DOES BQB CARE? – He blames himself for introducing the Yeti to a Western diet. The Yeti used to live on leaf rations in his Siberian village but has since been on a steady diet of cheese stuffed crust pizza and bacon infused cola ever since coming stateside.
FIT NERD!
BQB’s Attorney advises: This new feature will be a fun discussion about health but should you rely on and or take advice from a fictional nerd? No. He’s a fictional nerd for crying out loud. Consult your doctor as to what health/fitness strategies would work best for you.
Bookshelf Battle 