Best Pickup Lines – #50-75

#51 – The only band I ever listen to is Creed.  All day, everyday, nothing but Creed, Creed, and more Creed.  Can I take you higher?

#52 – Closing time.  You don’t have to go home but you can’t stay here.  However, as luck would have it, you are more than welcome to stay in my pants.

#53 – Do you think it’s fair that the top one percent of good looking men get to sleep with one hundred percent of the best looking women?  Do your part for sexual equality and help out one of the ugliest members of the ninety-nine percent of ugly men.  Seriously, I’m the Bernie Sanders of humping.

#54 – I’m just a squirrel looking for a nut.

#55 – I’ve got X-ray vision and I like what I see.  Yowza!

#56 – I’m not circumcised.  Seriously.  It looks like that monster that tried to eat the Millennium Falcon.

#57 – I’d love to leave one of my action figures on your night stand.

#58 –  Momma always said life is like a box of chocolates.  You just have to pinch a lot of ’em until you find the one you like.  Can I pinch you?

#59 – Do you want to see me naked?  Statistically speaking, someone out there must, so you never know, maybe you do.

#60 – Wanna have the best thirty seconds of passion followed by the best hour of awkward apologizing you have ever had in your entire life?

#61 – Don’t worry about getting knocked up, baby.  My swimmers aren’t exactly Michael Phelps.  By that I mean they don’t have any endorsement deals and they aren’t into trannies.

#62 – I forgot my condom at home.  However, I do just happen to have this empty Zagnut wrapper…

#63 – Welcome to O-Town.  Population: You.

#64 – Please!  Please, please, please, please, please, please, please…

#65 – I don’t have scurvy.  I eat limes on a regular basis.

#66 – Yes, I have crabs, but don’t worry.  They’re trained.

#67 – Pleased to meet you.  Might I make your vagina’s acquaintance?

#68 – Daddy’s home, baby.  Daddy’s home.

#69 – Sixty-nine.  It’s the most sensual of all numbers, don’t you think?

#70 – Look! I’ve got nothing up my sleeve…unlike my pants…

#71 – You like my scent?  One hundred percent Right Guard Sport.

#72 – You, me and a rodeo clown makes three.

#73 – Life is filled with disappointment.  Better to get them over with early.  Here, let me help…

#74 – I just popped a boner pill, so I’ve only got thirty minutes.  Give me a yes or a no quick so I can move onto the next one.  Law of averages, baby.  Law of averages.

#75 – I don’t think you will ever look better than you do right now.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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