Best Pickup Lines #76-100

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#76 – Hey baby.  I have some lotion and I would love it if you would put it in my basket.  Remember, if you don’t put it in the basket, you’ll get the hose again.

#77 – Pardon me, I know this sounds rude and offensive, but I just have to say you have an amazing body.  It would look fabulous in my crawlspace.

#78 – Does this rag I just pulled out of my pocket smell like chloroform to you?

#79 – You look so beautiful I just want to kiss you.  But first, can you sign these forms in triplicate stating your assent to me kissing you?  Also, we’ll need to find a late night drive-through notary office before we can get down to business.

#80 – You’ll probably never do any better than me.  I’ll probably never do any better than you.  Let’s just give up and be together already.  It’s not like anyone else is kicking down the door for us.

#81 – Oh, you like my outfit?  Good because the 1970s called and they said they will never take it back.

#82 – Let’s make some bad decisions.  Put me at the top of the list.

#83 – I look way better in the dark.  In fact, there are no lightbulbs in my place.

#84 – Can I just take a quick selfie with you so all my social media followers will assume I have something going on even though I clearly don’t?

#85 – Maybe’s there’s a python in my pants.  Maybe it’s just a lowly worm.  Pants roulette, baby.  Pants roulette.

#86 – I’m the best man I know but I admit I don’t know many people.

#87 – Let’s make this quick.  I have to get back to Gotham City and fight the Joker.  Shh, don’t tell anyone I told you that.

#88 – Am I ugly or are you just very judgmental?

#89 – I love to workout.  Every day I curl two pints of Ben and Jerry’s right into my pie hole.

#90 – Our children would no doubt look like hideous mutants.

#91 – Get out of my dreams…and into my pants.  No, wait!  My car!  Sorry, I always screw up that song.

#92 – Do you have a photo of your mother?  I’d like to know up front whether or not you’ll still be bone-able in twenty years.

#93 – Are you a member of PETA?  Good, because I’m one dirty animal that needs to be saved.

#94 – I look much better in my gimp mask.  Trust me.

#95 – Baby, you should stop smoking.  You’re hot enough already.

#96 – Where are your friends?  Before I date you I need to know you are the hottest one in the batch.

#97 – I can haz vagina?

#98 – McDonald’s on me baby.  Your choice of one item on the value menu, or you can have a Happy Meal but I get to keep the toy.

#99 – Maybe I’m a frog.  Maybe I’m a prince.  You’ll never know until you kiss me, girl.

#100 – I’m the lead singer in my boy band.

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