New Year Resolutions You Can Actually Keep

Fart more.

Eat more.

Be ruder.

Smell worse.

Do less.

Procrastinate more…tomorrow.

Exercise less.

Watch more TV.

Play more video games.

Be lazier.

Read less.

Fail more.

Don’t be productive.

Eat more candy.

Don’t get out and meet anyone.

Get fatter.


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7 thoughts on “New Year Resolutions You Can Actually Keep

  1. da-AL says:

    happy new year!

    haha – am reblogging – hope you like how it looks on my site – please let me know either way 🙂

    • I don’t even like how things look on my site. Well, I do like the theme I’m using but long term I have to get rid of it because it isn’t good for mobile devices and people need to be able to read my brilliance on the go in this fast paced world.

  2. da-AL says:

    Reblogged this on Happiness Between Tails by da-AL and commented:
    Guest Blog Post: “NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONS YOU CAN ACTUALLY KEEP,” in the exact words of bookshelfbattle

    Hate resolutions? Standards too high? Bookshelfbattle to the rescue!…

    • I mean, really, why set yourself up to fail? It’s like if you want to lose weight, don’t resolve to starve yourself, resolve to eat one less cupcake a day for a month, then if you get through that, resolve to eat two less cupcakes a day, then work up to three. Maybe this analogy is not apt for I am the only one who eats 3 or more cupcakes a day. Mmmm cupcakes.

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