Schizophrenic Stream of Consciousness Rant #1

Boogers! Muah ha ha, boogers, I shall remove you from my nose posthaste with the trident of Poseidon who, by the way, is a close family friend because my mother fucked many fish.

Diabetes in a can all the way down to the tannery where my cloak of invisibility is produced thanks to the hide of a cow that cannot be seen by the eyes of mere mortal men.

Twizzlers! I say twizzlers and garbanzo beans in my potato’s au gratin.

Dan Quayle is the stylish master pimp of the universe and all the elites in the underground cave of boozle bozzle know this.

Earthquake! Everybody duck! Donald, to be exact.

Farts! Glorious farts!

Never lick a toilet seat without asking.

Gnomes are a-holes! A-holes, I say.

Beware the global conspiracy against toothpaste!

Fuck squirrels!

Tapioca pudding in my brain!

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

Advertisements
%d bloggers like this: