Category Archives: Uncategorized

Daily Discussion with BQB – Should Oprah Run for President? (Howard Stern Says No)

Hey 3.5 readers.

BQB here.

I was listening to Howard Stern today (he actually came into work) and he had an interesting take on all the talk about President Oprah.

He said (and I remember this) years ago, he ran for Governor of New York as a goof.  He didn’t want the job and just did it as a promotion, to get his name out there and get some free press.  He didn’t think anyone would take him seriously so got scared when he actually ranked high in the polls.  Political consultants began getting in touch with him, sure he had a good shot at winning.

He backed out of it because he felt he would not do a good job.  He’s a funny radio guy and while he enjoys that and he has been successful as an entertainer, he did not believe he could handle the job of being governor – the tough decisions, the turmoil, the scrutiny, the studying, the non-stop nature of the job, 24/7 and weekends.  Ultimately, people rely on the Governor and he didn’t think he could deliver.

He thought maybe he might have won and who knows, perhaps from there he might have had a shot at the presidency but he didn’t want it.  He did not believe he would do a good job and so bowed out so an actual politician could win.

He likened his situation to Oprah and said that as a celebrity, especially one that came from humble beginnings without much money (as he and Oprah did) it is tempting to want everything, to take every offered opportunity, to do every TV show, movie, book, business venture, everything because no matter how big you get, you fear it might all go away and so it’s easy to see the presidency as the ultimate plaything, to increase your fame and status…but ultimately, you have to think not of yourself but of the country.

I think he has a good point and I’m wondering if we aren’t going down a path where perhaps there should be a mandate that to win the presidency you must hold some kind of prior office first?  Reagan was an actor, but he did go on to run a union and serve as governor of California.  He did his homework and got his government training.

I mean…when we hear of President the Rock….come on.  I don’t care how loved of a celebrity you are, the second you run for office, half the country will hate you.  Why not stay a celebrity and be loved by all?

On the other hand, TV has really screwed politics up, for years now.  Gone are the days when character, knowledge and experience matter.  How photogenic are you?  What’s your social media following like?

Howard said we need a modern day Winston Churchill but I have news for him – Winston could not win office today.  “Who’s that chubby little bald man with froggy voice?  Get him off the stage and put a squared jawed, perfect haired dummy in his place!”

In other words, politics and entertainment are hand in hand now, such that you can’t be an actor if you aren’t a hottie and let’s face it, you can’t be a politician unless you’ve got that super star quality either.

Discuss.

 

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Daily Discussion with BQB – KodakCoin

Hey 3.5 readers.

Kodak’s stock tripled today based on news that it is launching a new product, “KodakCoin,” getting in on the cryptocurrency phenomenon.

Gotta be honest, I’m surprised Kodak is still in business.  I dabble in the stock market, but I never would have thought to buy shares in Kodak because, I mean, their main claim to fame was built on physical camera film, which is basically like producing Model T fords or dinosaur pants.

Millennials, there was a time when you had to load film into your camera and the little gremlins inside your camera would etch a rough sketch of what you were pointing your camera at.  I’m pretty sure how that works.

Amazingly, Kodak remained in business over the years.  I believe if you ever go to a store and get physical prints of your digital photos, its usual a Kodak machine, so they showed some conversion to modern tech power.  Still, it’s got to be hard on a company when the product they were known for, i.e. Kodak film, becomes obsolete.

Not sure what KodakCoin is but it sounds like they’re devising a way for photographers to get paid when hteir images are used.  If you know more about it, tell me and also will you use it?

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Daily Discussion with BQB – The Accusations Against Stan Lee

Hey 3.5 readers.

BQB here.

When I was a kid, I made an effort to start an autograph collection.  I wrote to celebrities, usually to like the network they worked on, the company they worked for, and wrote polite little letters asking for an autograph.

I got a lot of form letters back telling me politely to pound sand…but I also got…a photo signed by the one and only Stan Lee. (Not gonna lie, I have debated for years whether he signed it or if it was a photo with the signature already printed on it, but either way, it was a better response than what I’d received from anyone else.

It made me happy because I used to watch the “Spider-Man” cartoon on Saturday mornings, narrated in his cool voice.

Sigh.  Excelsior, true believers.

He’s denied the accusations through his lawyers.  I think I’ll wait and see how the story develops before I say anything.

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Whoever Shared Me on Facebook…

Thank you.  It got me a lot of views.  If you feel like sharing, I’d like to see your post.  If not, that’s cool too.  Thank you so much.

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BQB’s Classic Movie Reviews – The Producers (2005)

Springtime…for Hitler…in Germany!

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BQB here with a review of Mel Brooks’ “The Producers.”  FYI, there was a 1960s movie that I haven’t seen yet (starring Gene Wilder and Zero Mostel), a 2005 movie version starring Nathan Lane and Matthew Broderick I did see and of course, a Broadway play I was never lucky enough to see.

In short, this story has been around forever, but if you want to avoid spoilers, then look away.

Mel Brooks is the funniest man in show business and he parodies everything.  “Blazing Saddles” was a sendup of Western flicks that were very popular up until like the late 1970s.  “Spaceballs” poked fun of “Star Wars” so naturally, when Brooks had the chance to produce a Broadway play, he made fun of Broadway.

Max Bialystock was once, as he song goes, “The King of Old Broadway.”  He laments that he used to have the best of everything, but now he’s a bum who hasn’t had a hit in years.  The critics rip him apart, pointing out that at the end of his musical version of Hamlet, “everyone is dead and they were the lucky ones.”

Bialystock meets uptight, super anxious accountant Leopold Bloom (Matthew Broderick)who poses a hypothesis, namely, that a producer could make more money with a flop than a hit.  In other words, Max has had a long history of swindling little old ladies out of their money, convincing them to invest in his plays that always tank.  However, if the show was so awful that it tanked on opening night, he could just walk away with the money.

Uma Thurman rounds out the cast as Ulla, the super hot Swedish babe who just knocks on Bialystock’s door one day, hoping to become a star.

The duo sets out to find the worst play ever written and find “Springtime for Hitler” penned by a Nazi enthusiast (Will Ferrell).  The boys hope the play will be so offensive that it will close opening night but alas, when the audience sees a flamboyantly gay Hitler mincing about stage, they take it as a hilarious parody and the show becomes a blockbuster smash.

As Bialystock laments, “Where did we go right?”

STATUS: Shelf-worthy.

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Buy My Book!

Hey 3.5 readers.

BQB here.

Just a regularly scheduled begging session, asking you, my beloved 3.5 readers, to buy my book, “BQB’s Big Book of Badass Writing Prompts.”

It’s 99 cents.  Honestly, other than a trip to the nudey bar, this is the best value you’ll ever get for a dollar.

I mean I don’t want to spell it out, but if you walk up to a nudey bar and wave a single dollar bill around, a stripper will show you her hey-nanner-nanner.  At least, they usually do.  I can’t guarantee they will.

But you’re upstanding citizens who don’t frequent such terrible places.  So check out my fine book.  You know you want it.

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The Shelfies – 2017 Award Season

Movie reviewer on what was supposed to be a book blog, Bookshelf Q. Battler, here.

I love movies and I watched a lot of them in 2017, so without further ado, the Shelfies.  Here’s the quick overview, and I’ll try to remember to reblog the reviews I wrote of these films in the coming days.

#1 – BEST FILM  – Wonder Woman

It’s the first comic book movie I’ve seen where an Oscar worthy case could be made.  Female empowerment though they weren’t preachy about it, blend of historic fiction and fantasy.  A good plot that kept the Warner Brothers DC films going even though the others have been stinkers.  It doesn’t hurt that images of Gal Gadot can give a man a boner from 50 paces.

RUNNER UP 1 – Logan

It was a year for semi-artistic, plot driven comic book movies.  Logan was a good case study on the ravages of time and how getting older can screw the best of us up.

RUNNER UP 2 – Get Out

Interesting, original movie about race relations.  Dramas about interracial issues might go a long way to alert the public, but a twisted, half-horror, half-dry/dark/understated humor comedy does a lot more.

#2 – WORST FILM – The Emoji Movie

Attention Hollywood.  The “what if inanimate objects could talk?” premise worked with toys in “Toy Story” because kids actually think their toys are alive.  It worked with Cars because little boys love cars.  No one, and I mean no one, ever gave a shit about what the emojis on their phone might be thinking.  Stop.  Just stop.  Seriously.  If you find yourself thinking, “I wonder what X inanimate thing is thinking,” just stop thinking about it because no one cares.

RUNNER UP 1 – The Mummy

I hate to do this, because there were parts of this film I liked, but Universal’s Dark Universe series didn’t get off to a good start.  I just don’t think people were longing for the Mummy and the Wolfman and Frankenstein and Dracula to get the band back together.  Good writing in this first film might have gotten people to want that, but Universal reached for the immersive cinema world and didn’t really grab the apple.  It just doesn’t leave you hoping for a Frankenstein movie where you’d be like, “OMG I hope Tom Cruise makes a cameo.”

RUNNER UP 2 – Transformers: The Last Knight

By God, I have no idea how Michael Bay manages to screw up a series about ten story tall outer space robots who can turn into cars and planes, complete with two warring factions fighting over an ancient grudge but by damn it if Michael Bay doesn’t figure out how to do this each and every time.

Bay’s sweeping disaster movie style was never a good fit for this franchise.  Too much focus on the humans.  We usually get the humans reacting to all these robots fighting but the robots were always the stars of the 1980s cartoon show.  Hate to be one of those nerds who whines about reboots of shows from his childhood, but the next director would be wise to check out the source material.

Seriously.  The Decepticons believe they are the master robot race and they have a right to suck all the resources out of Earth for their own personal use.  The Autobots believe they serve a higher purpose and must act as Earth’s guardians.  Good material for a good story.  Next time, let the robots take the wheel and put the humans in the back seat.

#4 – BEST COMEDY – The Hitman’s Bodyguard

Comedy is dead.  It’s so dead.  Hollywood is so afraid of offending anyone that most comedy films are filled with bland, predictable jokes now.  Go see “The House” if you don’t believe me.

Ryan Reynolds and Sam Jackson were funny together.  Lots of action.  I judge the best comedy by how much I laugh and this gave me the most laughs of the year.

#5 – BEST ANIMATED FILM – Lego Batman

Enough said, really.

#6 – BEST FILM THAT DESERVED MORE PLAY – Wind River

It’s important to know how Native Americans were screwed in the past, but this movie also shows us how Native Americans are getting screwed right now, today, you know, during the time we’re actually living so we might be able to effect change by writing our Congressman or some shit.

YOUR THOUGHTS

I want to hear what you thought about the movies you saw in 2017.  Tell me in the comments.

 

 

 

 

 

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Back in business!

Happy New Year, 3.5 readers.

BQB here.  Just got my brand new Surface Book 2.  Gotta say, I’m pretty impressed.  The future is here!

Turns from a computer to a tablet and back again seamlessly.  Going to take me awhile to figure it all out but one thing I like is that you can snap windows so you can do two things at once.

For example, right now I am blogging to my 3.5 readers and also watching Guardians of the Galaxy 2 on Netflix.

Does anyone really need to do two things at once?  I don’t know.  But it’s cool that you can.

I actually can see some useful potential, i.e. being able to put the blog on the left, Word on the right and cut and paste between the two.

It’s definitely cooler than any computer I’ve had thus far.  Nothing like I thought a computer would be like or do, say, ten years ago.

I treated myself to a brand spankin’ new one, but fun fact – if you’re interested, Amazon has the original 1 version of the Surface Book for around 800 something bucks.  i5 processor but still, a Surface book 2 with an i5 will run you about 1400 so, take advantage if you want a version of the Surface Book that won’t break the bank.

Sadly, I chose to break the bank.  But oh well, that just means I can’t buy any covers for books I won’t be publishing anytime soon for awhile.

 

My Computer Died

Sad news 3.5 readers. My MacBook died. Apple doesn’t crack, my ass. Oh well, in the meantime enjoy my back catalog.

I have ordered a Microsoft Surface Book so this fine blog should return to normal operations soon.

I’m sad to report though that 50,000 out of 100,000 edited words of Toilet Gator were lost in the destruction and now I must restart the entire process.

This sucks and Franklin should sue Apple for making the world wait longer for the release of the best novel ever written about Toilet gators.