Good Day, Bookshelf Battlers.
I am Bookshelf Q. Battler and I am now a month and a half into the challenge I have issued to myself, namely, to post once a day for the year of 2015.
It has been a grueling challenge, but well worth it, as it brings smiles to the faces of my 3.5 regular readers.
I will now take your questions.
QUESTION: Are you just an a-hole shouting into the wind?
ANSWER: Indeed I am…and a proud one at that.
QUESTION: This reminds me of that scene in Mr. Smith Goes to Washington, where Mr. Smith filibusters on the floor of the senate, except Jimmy Stewart had more charisma.
ANSWER: I think Jimmy Stewart was a fantastic actor. However, he lived in a time where you’d go knock on Hollywood’s door and say, “Hey Hollywood! I’d like to work in the entertainment industry please!” and Hollywood was all like, “Sure, come on in!”
QUESTION: It wasn’t really that easy even back then.
ANSWER: No, it wasn’t. And we even have amazing technology today that allows the common man to make his voice heard. The problem (perhaps ‘problem’ is not the best word) – the issue is that a whole helluvalot of people are using that technology to make their voices heard.
QUESTION: So this challenge is your way of trying to scream louder than the a-hole next to you?
QUESTION: Have you seen any results?
ANSWER: Since Christmas, I’ve gained over a thousand twitter followers for @bookshelfbattle – If you aren’t following it, I challenge your nerd street cred. Visitors to the site are increasing and a Google + site for the blog is going swimmingly. Join that too if you’re a Googler.
QUESTION: Has anyone tried to stop you from posting once a day?
ANSWER: Yes. The forces of evil do not like this blog. They don’t want this much awesomeness being brought into people’s blog feeds. Thus far, they have sent ninjas, aliens, bears, and asteroids after me.
QUESTION: Have they really?
ANSWER: I’m typing with my left hand and punching a werewolf sent to stop my blog with my right hand as we speak. I am a skilled mult-tasker.
QUESTION: You say odd things, like what you just said about a werewolf.
ANSWER: I have an odd sense of humor. Half of the people out there will get it and join in on the fun. The other half will think I’m an idiot who believes in werewolves.
QUESTION: You don’t believe in werewolves?
ANSWER: Um, hello! I just told you I’m fighting one!
QUESTION: Surely a werewolf will stop you from blogging.
ANSWER: I’ve trained under the world’s foremost werewolf hunters. I will be fine. It’s the werewolf you should be worried about.
QUESTION: Will anything stop you from posting once a day?
ANSWER: Absolutely not. If you can think of a hypothetical scenario that could stop me, let me know, and I will debunk it immediately.
QUESTION: Are you ever going to review some more books on your book blog? Because, you know, it’s a book blog.
ANSWER: I hope to. Even when I don’t, I do bring in a lot of literary references, discussions of writing, and so on. All in all, I feel this is a site that the average book nerd with a healthy sense of humor will enjoy.
QUESTION: Do you have any fun plans for the blog in the months ahead or is it just going to be a lot of obligatory “I like waffles” type posts just to meet the once a day challenge?
ANSWER: I’m not going to lie. By the end of this year, my 3.5 regular readers will be well versed in my breakfast food likes and dislikes. However, one fun project I am working on is the Bookshelf Battle origin story.
ANSWER: What life is like as the owner of a magical bookshelf upon which the inhabitants constantly do battle.
QUESTION: That sounds stupid.
ANSWER: Paramount already bought the movie rights.
QUESTION: Who’s playing you?
ANSWER: Channing Tatum
QUESTION: No, really.
ANSWER: Jonah Hill
QUESTION: No, really.
ANSWER: Fine. Danny DeVito.
QUESTION: No, really.
ANSWER: Alright! CGI Gollum.
QUESTION: Anything else?
ANSWER: Come April, it’s going to be a real Game of Thrones-a-palooza around here. I treat Game of Thrones Sundays in the Springtime the way so-called normal people do with the Superbowl. Except, arguably, Game of Thrones is better than the Superbowl, because stuff more interesting than a ball being moved around is happening. If you’re a GOT nerd, stop by in April.
QUESTION: Do you always interview yourself?
In conclusion, thanks everyone for following in and joining in on the fun. Together, we can bring the written word to the masses whilst not being all stuffy about it.