Best Pickup Lines – #175-200

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#175 – Picture it.  You and me on a deserted island.  Also, there’s a monkey playing a banjo.  The monkey serenades, then starts touching himself.  We want to look away but oddly enough, we cannot.  We then make hot passionate live while the monkey periscopes the entire affair.

#176 – I’m the other white meat.

#177 – Can I check you for stretch marks?

#178 – Can I check you for track marks?

#179 – Can I check the marks on your college transcript?  I don’t want to date a dummy.

#180 – Can I check the marks on your college transcript to make sure you did poorly?  I find that dummies make the best dates.

#181 – You’re so brave to go out in public, looking the way you do.

#182 – Nice dress.  Do you always shop at the curtain store?

#183 – I want to kiss you all over…but first…liquid courage!

#184 – Would you like to travel the world?  Would you also like to pay for all my tickets and travel expenses?

#185 – I’m a masseuse.  My foldable table is in my trunk.

#186 – Did you know that one night in Bangkok makes a hard man humble?  God, I wish Chess would get the band back together again.

#187 – I can take off my underwear without removing my pants.  Care to see?

#188 – This hair is mine.  Seriously.  I have the receipt.

#189 – My back hair is thick and lush.  You’ll feel like you’re running your fingers through a luxurious shag carpet.

#190 – Are you a religious woman?  No?  Don’t worry, I’ll have you screaming “Oh God!” by the end of the night.

#191 – Can we divvy up this bar tab?  I had like one beer and you had a million rum and cokes.

#192 – All my past girlfriends are famous.  They always end up with their faces plastered all over milk cartons.

#193 – I’d say it’s love at first sight, but I’ve been staring at you through your bedroom window for years now.  Whoops!  I let the cat out of the bag.  Silly me.

#194 – I’m a male prostitute and I charge by the hour.  How many hours can I put you down for?

#195 – Let’s do this!  I just popped a viagra and I don’t want to waste it.  Do you have any idea how much those pills cost?

#196 – Girl, you so fine you blow my mind.

#197 – May I have this dance?  No?  Fine, who needs you anyway?

#198 – I floss.  My dentist tells me I have the gums of a thoroughbred race horse.

#199 – What would you do for a Klondike bar?  I’m just curious because I have a whole box of them at home.

#200 – I’m so lonely.

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