TO: Oh Great One, the Awe Inspiring Mighty Potentate, Who Causes All Beings to Quake in Their Boots
FROM: Your Humble Servant, Alien Jones
RE: Bookshelf Q. Battlestats
All Hail the Mighty Potentate! May your ganderflazer’s secretions be copious and frothy until time folds over on itself and the totality of universal existence starts all over again!
As requested, an update on your plan to assist Bookshelf Q. Battler become a successful writer, thus stemming the flow of reality programming that threatens your beloved scripted television.
This Friday, May 15, the Summer of Bookshelf begins. Through a carefully plan series of hypnotic mind control experiments, I have convinced our noble blog host to provide a summer’s worth of serialized stories, in the hopes that he can find more than 3.5 readers.
“The State of the Bookshelf” as of May 13, 2014:
WORDPRESS FOLLOWERS: 969 (Ha! 69! I’m sorry, Mighty Potentate. I must be spending too much time amongst the humans).
TWITTER FOLLOWERS: 4,326
GOOGLE + FOLLOWERS: 377
It is my hope that this summer will help propel Bookshelf Q. Battler’s stats exponentially. Thus, I have asked the humans to do what they can to help as once BQB manages to figure out how to make folding paper money off his drivel, I shall be able to abandon this bogus assignment.
Err…I mean this wonderful opportunity. Yes, all ideas that originate in the mind of the Mighty Potentate are joyous and splendid.
Fear not, Mighty Potentate, for I shall report post-summer stats in the Fall.
EAST RANDOM TOWN, USA – Bookshelf Q. Battler’s 3.5 readers were aghast to learn that Bookshelf Q. Battler will croak louder than a frog with a bull horn in the very first part of Bookshelf Q. Battler and the Meaning of Life (Due out this Friday, May 15)
This reporter wanted to know what BQB’s known associates had to say:
ALIEN JONES (Intergalactic Correspondent, All Knowing Alien) – Dude! SPOILER ALERT! You’ve just ruined it for the 3.5 readers!
DR. HUGO VON SCIENCE (Prestigious Professor of Science at the Advanced Science Institute of Science University; Columnist, Inventor of the Incredible Exploding Chinchilla and Teflon Pants) – This makes no sense! So what happens? BQB just drops dead und pushes up zie daisies for zie rest of zie story?
THE YETI – International War Criminal, Furry Monster, Bookshelf Q. Battler’s Arch Nemesis) – ROAR! I hope so. A whole story about that loser pushing up daisies sounds good to me. He always cheats when we square off in roundhouse kick competitions!
Hardassimo (“Uncle Hardass”) J. Scrambler (The Ghost of BQB’s Deceased Uncle, Husband of Aunt Gertie, Ex-Employee of…THE SALT MINES!) – Good! Serves that poor excuse of a nephew of mine right! He’d still be cooking with gas if he’d gotten a job at the SALT MINES like I told him to.
But did he listen?
“NOOOOO!”
“I want to be a writer,” he says.
“I want to inspire the world through the written word,” he says.
Bah! Oh well. At least he can join me wherever the hell I am and I can lecture him for all eternity about what a colossal disappointment he is. If he’s smart, he’ll get a job at THE AFTERLIFE SALT MINES!
REPORTER: We asked BQB what he thought about this development.
BQB: Are you serious?
REPORTER: You drop deader than disco.
BQB: Well that’s a helluva way to start a story. What’s left? Thirty chapters of the Yeti tap dancing on my decomposing remains?
REPORTER: I’m sworn to secrecy.
BQB: Did you ever find out if my love interest will be played by Katee Sackhoff?
Briefly, I was sad to see Joss Whedon being accused of being anti-feminism. I mean, the guy is the creator of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. If you were a young person in the late 90’s/early 00’s you were glued to that show. Evil hideous vampires running in terror at the mere mention of “The Slayer.” Willow and Tara – one of the first open lesbian relationships I remember seeing on television. Faith the Vampire Slayer who went rogue. Willow goes from lowly nerd to witch of unstoppable power.
Meanwhile, if you saw the latest Avengers and thought that Black Widow came across as weak then I don’t know. I don’t think we saw the same movie.
You might have noticed that I’m a nerd. SPOILER – Due to said nerdyness, I cheered for the scene where Black Widow, referring to Bruce Banner, says “He’s kind of dorky. Chicks dig it.”
In my head, there was a voice that said, “No, no they really don’t but thank you for saying that, Black Widow. It made my day.”
If there had been some kind of effort in the film to portray Black Widow as some kind of brainless bimbo, wouldn’t she have gone for Thor’s muscles or Tony Stark’s money? No, she went for the nerdiest member of the team. The guy with the brain.
In reality, the nerd never gets the girl. Capt. America, Thor, and Iron Man can walk out the front door and score a dozen women before they hit the front porch, but in his human form, Bruce Banner is a super geek. It was nice to see a geek get the girl.
What’s the argument that Black Widow came across as weak? Strong women can’t fall in love? They can’t be comforting? Hulks need love too you know.
SPOILER – The main complaint centers around a scene where Banner tells Black Widow he can’t be with her because he’s a “monster” and he can’t have children. (I’m not actually sure why he can’t have children. Is there a scientific reason as in the gamma radiation fried his junk or just the general safety concern that if he had a kid the kid might misbehave, piss Bruce off and he’ll Hulk out? But I digress)
Black Widow shares that she can’t have children either because of a forced sterilizationprocedure she underwent during assassin training (no kids=no ties that can be exploited). She then says something like “you’re not the only monster on the team.”
Thus the fracas is over the idea that a woman who can’t give birth is somehow a “monster” but I don’t think that was what Whedon was trying to say at all.
I mean, from a writing perspective, maybe that point could have been clarified, but in general I think she was referencing her overall past as a ruthless killer and not necessarily the sterilization.
Or, maybe she was referring to it. Maybe she does feel down on herself because of it. Sometimes it is possible for a character to be too harsh on him or herself. Perhaps Black Widow needs to realize all she has to offer the world as a hero who’s now fighting on the side of good.
SPOILER – Times she came across as strong in the film:
That whole driving the motorcycle through the city chase scene
Various scenes where she fights with the men and holds her own
Towards the end, where, when faced with “going down with the ship” i.e. refusing to leave the “air island” while there were still people in danger on it, she nonchalantly says, “There’s worse ways to go.” That’s a sign of leadership right there.
On top of that, you have the new character, Scarlett Witch, who forms a team with her brother, Quicksilver and is arguably the stronger/more powerful of the duo.
I don’t know. I know it’s only a movie and I know feminism and women’s rights are important but I’m not sure I can think of anyone who’s done more to promote female characters in comic book style movies and TV than Joss Whedon.
SPECIAL GUEST COMMENTARY BY DR. HUGO VONSCIENCE, HEAD SCIENTIST AT THE ADVANCED SCIENCE INSTITUTE OF SCIENCE UNIVERSITY
Dr. Hugo Von Science
Guten Tag, Herr 3.5 Readers!
It is I, Dr. Hugo Von Science! Perhaps you recognize me from my many wunderbar inventions:
Teflon Pants – for those exceptionally messy jobs
Teflon Underpants – see above
The Colon Roomba – patrols your intestines, sucking up excess food. As soon as I gain FDA approval, you’ll never see another overweight person ever again!
EMPC Grenades – Similar to the Electronic Magnetic Pulse Grenades that knock out the enemies’ electronics, these do the same thing but they also deafen the Army’s opponents with a vigorous blasting of Cher’s greatest hits.
The Two Jump Pogo Stick – Literally get anywhere in the world within two jumps. We’ve lost many test chimps but we’re confident we’ll figure it out by 2018.
The Incredible Exploding Chinchilla – You laugh, but when we drop a thousand of these bad boys out of a plane with tiny parachutes, the enemy won’t know what hit them.
And last but certainly not least:
The X57 Planetary Smashing Death Ray – to be placed on the moon in order to hold the Earth for ransom and…woopsie! I’ve said to much.
Anyhow, I’d like to say a few words about my former student, Mr. Bookshelf Q. Battler, who took every class I taught at the Advanced Science Institute.
In fact, BQB’s assistance was instrumental in securing a patent for the Incredible Exploding Chinchilla. We were able to secure all legal rights to the invention, thus stopping those lesser bastards at Science Tech from their foolish plan to develop exploding ferrets.
Exploding ferrets. Like that would ever work.
BQB is a wise man, an intelligent man, and a generous man. In fact, he spotted me a portrait of Andrew Jackson just to say all this. That’s just the kind of guy he is.
But what you really need to know is that his epic story, Bookshelf Q. Battler and the Meaning of Life is coming to your computer screens on May 15. It’s going to be a blog serial, meaning every day throughout the summer, he’ll post a bite size chunk of his adventure tale right here on bookshelfbattle.com
The best part? He’s doing it for free! (Which makes sense because between you and me I suggested to him that he should spot you all a portrait of Andrew Jackson if he wants anyone to read it).
Whatever you do, be sure to read the part where I, the illustrious Dr. Hugo Von Science make a brief cameo in this stinkenheimer of a story.
By the way, I also hear mumblings that BQB has yet another series dropping on this blog on June 1. I have no involvement in that one because he’s thus far only been referring to it as “Project X.”
MARK YOUR CALENDARS
BQB AND THE MEANING OF LIFE – May 15
PROJECT X – June 1
It may or may not involve exploding chinchillas. You know what? Just assume there won’t be any exploding chinchillas in Project X and then you will be pleasantly surprised if there are some. (Or surprised if there aren’t any, if you’re one of those namby pambies who can’t appreciate a good exploding chinchilla.
Finally, I just want to point out that BQB’s strongest subject has never been math. He claims as some kind of a joke that he only has 3.5 readers but he just told me his blog has around 900 followers.
Such a poor math student. That reminds me – due to poor calculations, BQB’s first one hundred chinchilla test subjects did not even explode. It was only when I pointed out to him that he forgot to carry the one was he able to explode chinchillas at a fast and furious pace.
Either way, if you haven’t followed the Bookshelf Battle Blog, now’s the time to do so because you’ll be able to take in free serialized stories on this blog all summer long.
And who knows? I might return to talk more about scientific happenings of a scientific nature.
Danke schön,
Dr. Hugo Von Science
Head Scientist
Advanced Science Institute of Science University
Mad scientist photo courtesy of a shutterstock.com license.
We all say, “oh, I’m just in it for the art!” but deep down, we all secretly hope, dream and fantasize that one day our writing will be embraced by the masses, a big pile of money will be dumped on our heads, and our work will be read by everyone and turned into a Hollywood movie!
Well, as it turns out, that happened for Andy Weir, author of The Martian.
Keep one thing in mind, aspiring scribes – success in the writing game doesn’t happen overnight.
Andy discussed how he’s been at it for years – that he’s been blogging since the early 2000’s, how he spent a long time seeking a traditional publishing deal with no success, that initially wrote “The Martian” as a serial on his blog, that his followers urged him to turn said serial into an ebook on Amazon and boom, it took off. Now he’s a highly successful author and a movie based on his book starring Matt Damon is scheduled for release at the end of this year.
The important thing to note? Yes, some people are very lucky and see those doors to success swing wide open for them early on. And good for them. Others, like Andy, had to painstakingly climb that ladder one rung at a time.
After hearing his story, I can’t think of someone more deserving. He really put his work in and earned his success.
As always, Johnny, Sean and Dave bringing us a great show. And they didn’t even veer off topic this time!
According to Yale Professor Meg Urry in a CNN column, “When Can We Talk to Aliens?” astronomers estimate that there may be as many as 40 billion habitable planets in the Milky Way Galaxy alone.
That’s not even taking other galaxies into consideration.
Space – it’s really friggin’ big.
Does this mean those planets have intelligent life on them? We don’t know. But Urry states:
Intelligent life that can communicate via radio waves with other intelligent life is less than 100 years old here on Earth.
So while planets that develop simple forms of life may be a dime a dozen, the number that have sentient beings with whom to converse — even assuming they evolved as humans did, with ears and spoken language, or eyes and written language — is likely to be tiny. And life that can use radio waves has existed on Earth for only 0.000002% of the planet’s history — 100 years out of 4.5 billion. If the half dozen or so rocky, Earth-like exoplanets now known are similar, the odds of discovering humanlike life on them are about the same as, well, winning your state lottery with one ticket.
Of course, if there are 40 billion Earth-like planets out there, the odds improve quite a bit. If they all have histories like the Earth’s, there might be 1,000 planets in the Milky Way that could support communicative beings.
– Meg Urry, “When Can We Talk to Aliens?” CNN. April 2015.
Let’s break this down.
40 billion habitable planets – and that’s just in our galaxy. However, habitability does not automatically mean life exists, or that intelligent life exists.
On top of that, if intelligent beings are out there, they will have had to have evolved to the point where they know how to communicate via radio waves in order for us to communicate with them. We’ve only figured that out in the past hundred years, the blink of an eye given the vast expanse of human history.
My mind is blown. True, we have no idea of truly knowing that which we cannot confirm with our eyes.
However, statistically speaking…40 billion habitable planets…1,000 planets that could have possibly had a species that evolved to the point where they can communicate with technology of some kind.
There very well may be an alien on another planet that is a bizarro version of me, writing a blog that is only read by 3.5 readers, including an alien version of my Aunt Gertrude.
Amazing. Simply amazing.
If you’re reading this aliens, we come in peace. Let us learn from one another in the spirit of unity and harmony.
Also, please don’t invade our planet and eat our faces.
BOOKSHELF Q. BATTLER: Alien Jones, why didn’t you tell me there might be 1,000 planets with beings as smart as we are?
ALIEN JONES: Because they’re all smarter than you are. 1,000 planets and not one of them has reality television. Zing. Thank you. I’m here all week. Tip your waitresses. Good night everybody.
Greetings Earth Losers. Alien Jones here to answer your questions and
pump your planet full of extraterrestrial intelligence.
Why? No offense, but your planet is dumb. Very dumb. There are no words to express its level of dumbositude. So very, very, very dumb.
This week I answer a question from none other than Blogger-in-Chief, Bookshelf Q. Battler, who continues to be a Yeti hostage:
Alien Jones! BQB here.
Pixels – WTF?
WTF indeed, BQB. WTF indeed.
Feast your vision receptacles on this trailer, insignificant humans:
Pixels Trailer – Sony Pictures Entertainment
Coming to a theater near you this summer…assuming the North Koreans are cool with it.
To elaborate on BQB’s “WTF” I will ask and answer questions I assume are on the minds of this blog’s 3.5 readers:
Q. In Pixels, 1980’s era humans place a time capsule on the Moon which contains, among other examples of Earth culture, 1980’s video games. The aliens misunderstand and take the time capsule as a threat of war and respond by creating massive video game characters, which they use to attack Earth. The trailer shows Pac-Man, Donkey Kong, and Space Invaders attacking Earth.
Is it possible for such a misunderstanding to lead to an intergalactic war?
A. Such misunderstandings happen all the time. The Moloklaxons have been on a thousand year campaign, sweeping through the galaxy, taking one planet after another, all because an ambassador from the Intergalactic Diplomacy Organization broke wind in their ruler’s presence. It wasn’t meant as an insult. The ambassador had some bad tacos the night before and couldn’t help it.
Q. But seriously, aliens think video games are real and respond with giant video game characters?
A. Most species laugh at your video games because ours are so much better. Few species would respond with war, though the Moloklaxons are willing to fight over anything.
Q. What’s the point of this movie? Is it serious? Is it a comedy? What the hell is going on?
A. There are some serious looking Independence Day-esque scenes of monuments being attacked by video game inspired space ships. On that note, it looks serious. On the other hand, it stars Adam Sandler and it is about attacking video game characters, so it must be a comedy.
Q. Is it going to be good?
A. It will either be great or it will suck with the force of a thousand Dysons. There will be no in between. It will either be considered a unique and fun premise or will be Sandler and co’s attempt to run around with video game characters of their youth that sadly today’s kids don’t care much about. Pac Man was fabulous for its time but today’s youngsters want Call of Duty.
I fear young people will be like “Who’s Pac Man?” and old people will be like, “I’m so old because I used to play Pac Man!”
I will withhold judgment until I see it and will hope that it is excellent.
Q. Is there a ray of hope?
A. It stars Peter Dinklage in a role where he is not Tyrion Lannister. He is always great as Tyrion but this will give him a chance to branch out.
Thank you for your time, 3.5 readers. Kim Magennis, loyal Bookshelf Battle fan and proprietor of the Whimsy Blog submitted some questions. I have been a bit swamped this week, what with my ongoing diplomatic efforts to convince various worlds to stop trying to annihilate one another. I will definitely get to those next week.
Alien Jones is the Intergalactic Correspondent for the Bookshelf Battle. Do you have a question for the Esteemed Brainy One? Submit it to Bookshelf Q. Battler via a tweet to @bookshelfbattle, leave it in the comment section on this site, or drop it off on the Bookshelf Battle Google + page. If AJ likes your question, he might promote your book, blog, or other project while providing his answer.
Submit your questions by midnight Friday each week for a chance to be featured in his Sunday column. And if you don’t like his response, just let him know and he’ll file it into the recycling bin of his monolithic super computer. No muss, no fuss, no problem.
Alien Jones here, beaming the answers to the great questions of the universe straight to your laptops, cell phones, iPads, Kindle Fires, Samsung Galaxies, and yes, even to you oddballs who still cling to your blackberries, desperately trying to party like it’s 2003.
First, let us address the proverbial elephant in the room. Our esteemed Blogger-in-Chief, one Mr. Bookshelf Q. Battler, has been taken captive by the Siberian Yeti, after having his compound overtaken by the same aforementioned ne’er-do-well snow monster.
Truly, this is a sad state of affairs. Already, I anticipate your first, second, and third questions:
Q. Alien Jones, you are the most badass alien in the universe, a master of all manner of lethal technologies and advanced weaponry. Surely, you can remove a Yeti from Bookshelf Battle HQ.
A. Certainly I could. However, have you ever heard of Star Trek’s “prime directive?” In short, it is a rule that prevents Star Fleet officers from interfering with the advancement of alien civilizations, thus allowing beings to develop on their own. My home world has a version of that rule. It goes by the less interesting name of the “Don’t Help Aliens With Stuff Rule.”
Q. Why are you referring to humans as aliens? You’re the alien.
A. To me, you’re the alien.
Q. If you have a rule against helping alien civilizations, why are you writing a Q and A column on a book blog with 3.5 readers?
A. My illustrious emperor felt that humans were so colossally stupid that there was some wiggle room. Either I nudge humanity in the right direction or cheese stuffed crust pizza and reality television will spread across the universe. We scientists refer to this much feared event as “The Great Dumbening.”
Now then. I didn’t receive any questions this week, which is surprising. Not to be rude or anything but to borrow a line from The Simpsons, “what you people don’t know could fill a warehouse.” So, I’ve decided to ask myself a series of questions surrounding a topic that some of you Earth creatures have been wrestling with lately.
Q. Alien Jones, should I have my kid vaccinated?
A. If your Doctor advises it, then yes.
Q. But vaccines cause autism! I’ve heard so many anecdotes about kids getting vaccinated and then becoming autistic.
A. Anecdotes aren’t science. Your kid wears diapers. Do diapers cause autism? Your kid breathes air. Does air cause autism? Your kid watches Barney. Do people in purple dinosaur costumes cause autism?
Q. But we live in such healthy times compared to the days of long ago. Surely, small pox or measles can’t be that big a deal.
A. Picture me slapping my three fingered hand against my cranial dome in disgust, as I realize I know more about your world’s history than you do. In the dark ages, long before vaccinations were invented, various plagues and diseases swept through one country after the next. Every village had a man who would push a cart through the streets just to collect all the corpses. The reason why you don’t see people dropping like flies these days is due in large part to vaccines (the idea of which we aliens beamed into the minds of your most prominent doctors because it made us sad you were all croaking like frogs on a log). Ultimately, it makes no sense to this alien why humans would put their children at risk for contracting a medieval disease that was put out of commission by medical science long ago.
Q. But my doctor’s medical opinion might be that my kid should not be vaccinated.
A. That is entirely possible. There are some kids with medical issues where a vaccine could pose a problem. But at least you based the decision not to vaccinate on a medical professional’s advice, and not a comment made by Jenny McCarthy on a day she decided to wear pants.
Q. But you can’t prove that vaccines don’t cause autism.
A. I can’t prove that you’re not wearing invisible underpants forged from solid gold.
Q. And why should I take your word for this?
A. You should absolutely not take my word about any of this. In fact, if any crooked lawyers are reading this, be aware that I am a fictional alien that exists in the mind of a blogger, and therefore my word should not be relied upon as medical advice. You should contact a doctor, who will be able to give you a medical opinion as it applies to your individual kid’s situation. Bookshelfbattle.com, its nerdy proprietor, and this Alien Correspondent do not in any way, shape, or form hold anything written on this site as medical advice that should be relied upon.
Q. Why do you dislike lawyers?
A. Because they are the same people who made a world where a car company that put out an obviously fictional advertisement in which a car is driven on top of a train felt it necessary to add a clause warning people against trying such an obviously ill-advised and impossible endeavor.
*Nissan Rogue “Commute” Commercial
No offense, but my esteemed emperor wrote humans off as a lost cause at the exact moment that he realized you are all so stupid that this commercial required a statement at the bottom of the screen that read “Fantasy, do not attempt. Cars can’t jump on trains.”
I’m doing my best not to insult humanity but it’s just that, you know, on my world, we’re able to watch this commercial and already understand that we should not attempt to jump a car onto a train.
But I suppose companies must provide ample warnings to assist the simplest of a simple species.
One more question likely on your mind:
Q. If this site is occupied by the Siberian Yeti, how are you posting on it?
A. My species invented intergalactic space travel. I’m pretty sure we can get a post onto a blog.
HONORABLE MENTION
While I received no inquiries this week, shout outs to:
Anita Lovett of Anita Lovett and Associates for tweeting a request for the twitosphere to help Bookshelf Q. Battler raise the 4000 follower ransom required to remove bookshelfbattle.com from unjust Yeti occupation. The rest of you were content to allow BQB to waste away as a Yeti hostage. For shame. For shame, I say.
Krissy Penner of cricketsareok.com for submitting video proof of alien existence (I could be wrong, but that guy on the left looks like a colleague I met as a cadet in the Intergalactic Exploration Corps). Counterargument – this video may have nothing to do with aliens but rather, is a rap performance.
Bookshelf Battle Blog Followers, you might notice that BQB has been promoting some of you through other forms of social media. He has been on a real “pay it forward cosmic karma” kick lately. If you aren’t cool with it, just let him know, but I assume it’s his way of thanking those who aid in his quest to double his readership from 3.5 to a whopping 7 readers.
Thank you for your time, 3.5 readers. I must now travel to the planet known as Moikro. I am on a very sensitive diplomatic mission, namely, to convince two separate alien species to stop bogarting each other’s space snacks. They’re about to go to war over who gets to keep the planet’s supply of buffalo wing chip dippers, and my friends, it will not be pretty if diplomacy fails to win the day.
Alien Jones is the Intergalactic Correspondent for the Bookshelf Battle. Do you have a question for the Esteemed Brainy One? Submit it to Bookshelf Q. Battler via a tweet to @bookshelfbattle, leave it in the comment section on this site, or drop it off on the Bookshelf Battle Google + page. If AJ likes your question, he might promote your book, blog, or other project while providing his answer.
Submit your questions by midnight Friday each week for a chance to be featured in his Sunday column. And if you don’t like his response, just let him know and he’ll file it into the recycling bin of his monolithic super computer. No muss, no fuss, no problem.
Woo hoo! An honest to God book review on bookshelfbattle.com! It’s about time!
Threeps are now walking around on my bookshelf. They can hold their own in the never-ending battle.
Without a doubt, John Scalzi’s Lock-In was the best book I read in 2014. Unfortunately I waited until March of 2015 to review it, but better late than never.
If you’re planning to read it yourself, you might want to click off of this review. I’ll try my best to avoid them, but some spoilers may emerge.
First off, the premise is unique and original. In the near future, a virus ravages the world and inflicts one percent of the population with Haden’s Syndrome. This condition causes people to “lock-in” to their bodies. Their minds work, they understand what’s happening around them, but they can’t speak or move. Their minds are trapped in paralyzed bodies.
These individuals come to be known as “Hadens.” Technology grows and expands to help them. A virtual community is created allowing them to communicate with one another in a simulated world. Meanwhile, Hadens also have the ability to control robots known as “threeps” (aptly named as an homage to C-3P0).
Hadens stay at home and send threeps out into the world on their behalf. The technology is so advanced that Hadens are able to hold down jobs with the assistance of their threeps.
Add to the mix integrators – humans whose minds can be “shared” with a Haden, thus giving the Haden the experience of what it feels like to have a functional human body.
The protagonist is Chris Shane – a Haden FBI agent whose threeps take a beating from the bad guys throughout the novel. With the help of his partner, Leslie Vann, a former integrator, Shane is tasked with solving a murder case that intersects with the politics and intrigue behind the Haden world.
I am a big Scalzi fan. I enjoy his ability to blend subtle humor into serious science fiction. The premise makes for some interesting scenes. For example, at one point, Shane uses his threep to foil an assassin trying to kill Shane’s defenseless body.
The book also gives rise to a discussion of virtual worlds and technology assisted realities. Could tech ever grow to the point where the paralyzed are able to experience the world virtually? What would be the ramifications?
Alien Jones, so named because his true moniker is virtually unpronounceable by the average human, is taking
Alien Jones, Special Guest Contributor
your questions and telling all in an effort to raise Earth above it’s current status as “the armpit of the universe.” (His words, not mine.)
What’s the deal with probing? Crop circles? Area 51? Space travel? Other planets? What’s his favorite
book? TV show? Movie? Ask him about the great mysteries of the universe, or hell, ask him why McDonald’s discontinued the McRibwich. There is no question his genius alien brain cannot answer.
So ask away and you never know, he may even be gracious enough to plug your blog in his answer.
Ask him in the comment section of this blog, tweet your questions to @bookshelfbattle or ask him on the Bookshelf Battle Google + page.
Together, we can help this alien in his message to raise our home world’s collective intelligence level. And let’s face it, that’s a pretty tall order.
Alien Image Courtesy of “Marauder” on openclipart.org
Bookshelf Battle 