Tag Archives: amazon kdp

Get a Free Book

Yes, I’m back again, peddling my free book.  It’s free.  You don’t have to do anything but download a free copy and help me increase my stats.  Why won’t you help your beloved magic bookshelf caretaker/yeti fighter, 3.5 readers?

 

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My Big Book of Badass Writing Prompts is Free All Week!

Hey 3.5 readers.

Your old pal BQB here.  My big book of Badass Writing Prompts is free all this week on Amazon.

Free.  Gratis.  You pay zilch, zero, nada.  So, if you want to help keep the lights on around here, all you need do is go and download a copy, for free, and that’s it.  Leave a review and you’d be helping a lot but otherwise, just give me a download to add to my states.

Thanks, 3.5:

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A Rap About the Seventy Cent Royalty I Was Paid For My E-Book (Or, “Seventy Cents”)

Yo.  2017.  Time to grip the green.  Lay down some treble and crank up the bass.  Bookshelf Q. Battler all up in this place, gettin’ ready to blast some beats in your face.  Let’s do this shit.

Sometimes a man just got a dream…a vision in his eye and a song in heart.

But the world do all it can to rip him apart.

So he falls to the floor, his body feels spent.

Then he checks his account, sees he’s got seventy cent.

Oh seventy cents!  You are a dream come true!

Gonna travel the world spending you!

Oh seventy cents!  I’m rich as fuck!

What did my ass do to deserve all this luck?

Yo, I was in the bodega, and something struck me as funny.

A girl was all alone and she was a fly ass hunny.

So I said, “Girl you wanna get with me? I got a lotta money.”

And soon we were going’ at it like a couple of bunnies.

And then the girl was like, “How much money you got cuz I’m feeling pretty fine?”

And I was like, “Girl, relax, cuz I got seven dimes.”

Oh seventy cents!  For a book that I spent like 600 fuckin dollars to print!

Yes, to see that money you gotta squint!

Seventy cents!  Lift me outta my rut!

And Jeff Fuckin’ Bezos gotta take his cut!

Oh seventy cents, yes you are true!

Three quarters minus a nickel, I love you!

DISCLAIMER:  We here at the Bookshelf Battle Blog always love it when Jeff Fuckin’ Bezos takes his cut of the proceeds from the book we put out that like 3.5 people have read.  We hope Mr. Bezos puts the money to good use, most likely to become the Supreme Overlord Ruler of Us All.  Hail Bezos!

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My Book is Scarily Awesome!

Hey 3.5 Hallo-weiners.

BQB here.  Boo!  And so forth.  Sorry, I’ m out of candy because I ate it and told the kids to get jobs and buy their own because this isn’t Russia and we aren’t filthy commies.

But that’s ok because I have the best treat ever.  My book of Badass Writing Prompts is only 99 cents and well, if you’ve been reading this blog, and I know 3.5 of you have, then, you know, I don’t mean to be a dick, but come on, open up your wallet and make a tiny contribution towards keeping the lights on in BQB HQ.

There’s nothing scarier than a writer who has not read my badass book of writing prompts, that’s for sure:

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Someone in England Bought My Book

Do I have to fill out twenty forms to be able to accept the 29 British cents or is that Amazon’s problem and I’m accepting money from Amazon, an American company?

I dunno.  I don’t want to be accused of being a British spy for accepting 29 British cents just because some guy in Liverpool wanted to check out my writing prompts. Lord knows I have always vowed to report redcoats wherever I see them and I have never allowed the King to quarter troops in my domicile.  Also, I never drink tea and have urged all of my neighbors to throw their tea into the nearest harbor.  I even burned all my Beatles albums…except for Hey Jude because if you can listen to that song and not cry you are a heartless bastard.

Surely, someone out there has had your book bought by a British person…what do you do?

(Also, thank British person for buying my book.  If anyone else wants to buy it, they can do so here.)

Bookshelf Q battlers for Amazon

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My First Review!

Hey 3.5 readers.

BQB here.

I’m sorry.  My book is like my baby and I’m one of those parents who makes a post every time his kid poops or burps or does something he finds adorable but most people think is lame.

Anyway, I received my first review!  And it was a 5 star!  So thank you, reader.  You have exceptional taste in books and you are an astute reviewer of books because honestly, BQB’s Big Book of Badass Writing Prompts really and truly is a 5 star book.

And it can be yours for 99 cents!

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BQB’s Writing Prompts Dropped to 99 Cents!

Ugh.  Look how low I’ve fallen, 3.5 readers.  The 99 cent bin already.

It was free for five days and in that time I gave away 120 free copies.  I thought that was a good start.

I think it is worth more.  It’s got a fabulous cover and some pretty funny content.  However, after two days without a sale at $2.99, I decided that it would be better for the long run to just concentrate, for now, on bringing in more fans and then the profits will come later.

So, I’ll get a whopping 35 cents per 99 cent copy I sell, which should earn me an astounding $1.23 if all 3.5 of you fine readers buy a copy.

Just don’t do it all at once.  I’m worried that extra $1.23 might move me into a higher tax bracket.

Buy my book here.

Bookshelf Q battlers for Amazon

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Last Chance for a Free Book!

Hey 3.5 readers.

BQB here.

Bookshelf Q battlers for Amazon

Just a reminder that today is the last day of my free book giveaway for BQB’s Big Book of Badass Writing Prompts.

If you like my blog, like my work, if I’ve ever brightened your day with my witty banter, please mosey on over to Amazon and pickup a free copy.  The more books I can give away, the more my stats rise, the more people discover the book and so on.

You don’t have to pay any money, you don’t even have to read it although you should because it’s funny…you just have to download the book for free and that’s it.

Thanks 3.5 readers.

DOWNLOAD BQB’S BOOK HERE

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My Book is Free This Weekend!

Hey 3.5 readers.

I know.  I’ve become “that guy.”

The guy that repeatedly tries to give away his book instead of coming up with something new and interesting to say.

I can’t help it.  I’m like a proud father and this book is my baby.  So, just reminding you all it is free this weekend – totally FREE, so download your copy today and check it out.

That’s it.  I’ll zip my lip about it for a while.  Well, I might remind you tomorrow, possibly Monday, but that’s it.  Scout’s honor.

DOWNLOAD MY BOOK FOR FREE!

Bookshelf Q battlers for Amazon

 

 

 

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Have You Gotten Your Free Copy Yet?

Hey 3.5 readers.

Your old pal BQB here.

So, it was a semi-exciting day today.

Last night, I began a free promo for BQB’s Badass Writing Prompts.  That’s right, you can get your very own free copy by clicking here.  That’ll last till Monday, June 12, when it will go back up to $2.99, so…uh…how do marketers do this?  Act fast!  Get your free copy today!  My prices are insane!  I’m Crazy BQB and all my books are priced so low they ought to lock me up in the funny farm!

But I digress.  Like a proud papa with a new baby, I checked on the status of my book all day today and was delighted to see that the free promo was helping it move up the charts:

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#33 in Kindle Store – Kindle E books – Reference – Writing, Research and Publishing Guides – Writing Skills?  Huh, sounds awesome. (Note that apparently means it is in the top 100 of the free part of this section.  At least that’s what I think it means.  I am still new to all of this.)

#9,637 in Free Kindle Store?  Huh, well, there’s still 9,636 peeps ahead of me but ok, that sounds pretty awesome too.

So, being a total novice at this I thought, “Hmm…I mean, I’m not in this game to give stuff away for free and make no money but these rankings sound so awesome that I must have given away like thousands of copies.  Think of it as a down payment.  Give out lots of free books today and readers will turn into fans who will pay for your stuff tomorrow.”

But then I checked out my figures.  15 free copies.  15.  And seriously, I love all 15 of you but I really thought I’d of given away like thousands of copies.

At any rate, I’m not sure how these rankings are figured but my book has been moving up in the ranks all day so however it is done, I’m just going to say thank you to Amazon and Lord Bezos, Supreme Commander of the Internet and All Digital Media He Surveys Until He Conquers the Globe…OR HAS HE ALREADY AND LEFT US NONE THE WISER?  MUAH HA HA!

But seriously.  I know.  15 copies is nothing to sneeze at.  It’s still early.  And the one thing I have always noticed about online media is it is one of few activities I have participated in where the results get better every year.

Long story short, I hope you’ll take advantage of this free promo.  I’m not asking you 3.5 readers to do much.  Just download a free copy.  If you like it, give it a fab review.  If you have any thoughts you’d like to share, let me know.

AND – do keep in mind it is a book filled with writing prompts, so if you’re a blogger and you’re looking for ideas to blog about, here’s your chance to get some inspiration.

Thank you, 3.5 readers.

Bookshelf Q battlers for Amazon

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