By: Count Krakovich, Asshat Vampire
You’d think a vampire sex tape would be interesting but no.
Remember, vampires don’t cast a reflection.
Ergo, a vampire sex tape is just a two minute video of a bed that includes audio of a lot of strange, disturbing noises.
If a vampire is hassling you, just threaten to release that vampire’s sex tape.
Sure, no one will see the vampire, but people might recognize his voice.