Daily Archives: October 10, 2016

Search Engine Optimized Poet – An Ode to Ken Bone

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SEO Poet

:::Bongo Drum Beats:::

Hey there all you hep cats and hep kittens. Come on down to the East Randomtown Java Bean, where the poets always stink and the cups are never clean.

Next on the mic is the one and only Search Engine Optimized Poet…the only rhyme-smith whose beats bring in the web searchers’ feets, ya dig?

Ken Bone!

Whoa, Ken Bone!

Why is your sweater so bright?

Portly mustached man with thinning hair and glasses for your sight.

Fright?  Of a world that doesn’t treat you right?

No. He refused to give that thought a single respite.

He wanted answers as to the country’s energy plight.

Fight! That’s what the presidential debate was.

But…buzz! That’s what Ken Bone got because…

…he wears his lip fuzz…

…like a boss.  He didn’t get cross and he had nothing to hide

A breathe of fresh air while the rest of the country sighed,

At two dummies who make the founding fathers cry.

Ken Bone! Look at you and the way you plug about your day.

Just because you’re not a supermodel you don’t feel any dismay.

Or, if you do, it never shows,

Even though around and around the toilet bowl is where our country goes.

Ken Bone you are a star, especially to me,

And a champion of non-supermodels everywhere, just like BQB.

BQB EDITORIAL NOTE: I’d like to say I’m very proud of Ken Bone.  Although I have to say it shouldn’t be a news story that someone who is a little chubby and style challenged was able to ask an interesting question at a presidential debate, I’m glad that he did.

He’s become a bit of an Internet sensation and I feel part of that is a lot of people saying, “Wow! People who don’t look like supermodels have thoughts?!”

Yes. Yes they do. Stop being so surprised.

Still, as far as I’ve heard, no one seems to be busting on him (at least not in a mean way) so whenever the Internet shows class we can be happy.

Finally, to increase SEO optimization, allow me to say – Ken Bone! Ken Bone. Ken Bone. Ken Bone, the guy in the red sweater who asked a question at the presidential debate.

Yes, the debate with Trump vs. Clinton where Ken Bone asked a question about energy. Also, Ken Bone.  Or possibly, Kenneth Bone.

 

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#31WaysToDefeataVampire – Way #10 -Political Debates

By: Count Krakovich, Asshat Vampire

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Bleh!

I don’t know about you 3.5 readers, but when a political debate is supposed to be about substance and it devolves into which candidate is a less shitty person, it makes me want to crawl back into my coffin and sleep for a hundred years, bleh.

The next time a vampire comes at you, just play the latest presidential debate.

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#31Zombie Authors Rewind – Day 10 – Armand Rosamillia – 15o Stories, 2 Podcasts

With Your Host: Schecky Blargfeld, Zombie Comedian

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Look 3.5 readers, I’m a zombie and even I’ll admit that if a zombie apocalypse ever breaks out, Armand Rosamillia is a dude that you’ll want on your side.

Armand does not fight zombies.  He just gives them a good, stern glare and then the zombies turn tail and walk away sullenly to sulk and think about what they’ve done, embarrassed that they’ve wasted their undead lives trying to eat people’s delicious brains.

Last year BQB talked to Armand about zombies and other monsters.

Check out that interview here.

And don’t forget to check out Dying Days 7, available for pre-order on Amazon now.

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