By: Count Krakovich, Asshat Vampire

Bleh!
It’s time for me, your favorite asshat vampire, to channel that one hit wonder 1990s band Semisonic, 3.5 readers.
Here we go:
Closing time, bleh! One more call for alcohol so finish your whiskey or beer, bleh!
Closing time, bleh! You don’t have to go home but you can’t stay here, bleh!
Just kidding. Stay here all you want. Click on lots of posts. It makes BQB feel like his life has meaning.
Bleh, I hate vampires because vampires have treated me badly just because my incompetence got seven or eight hundred of them killed and unlike Elsa, they do not let it go.
Vampires and your mother-in-law, both good at holding grudges, am I right, bleh?
To wrap this up – blogging. If you make a vampire blog for thirty-one days about thirty-one ways to defeat a vampire, he will end up exhausted, 3.5 readers. He really will, bleh.
I am defeated, bleh.
Thanks a lot, asshats. Hope you enjoyed it. Or do? I don’t care because I’m a douche-pire, bleh.
Happy Halloween. Eat lots of candy. Avoid the fun size candy bar scam, bleh.