Bookshelf Battle

“There’s something else I’m forgetting to tell you,” Miles said. “I’m sure of it.”

Gunther stood up and stretched his arms out. “Couldn’t have been that important.”

Miss Bonnie walked around the table and kissed the boy on the forehead. “You were very brave.”

Gunther seconded that sentiment with a slap on Miles shoulder. “I didn’t know your Pa long but from what I gathered he was a good man. He’d be proud of you.”

Slade…well. He was Slade. “Good job, kid.”

The redhead walked on to look out the window. Slade noticed his near catatonic bride was sitting in a pew with her knees tucked up under her chin. It pained him not to go to her, but he felt a compulsion to see Miss Bonnie instead.

He waited a moment or two until everyone else was busy, then sauntered up beside her.

Together, Slade and Miss Bonnie watched as zombies wandered around aimlessly in the road. Eventually, they struck up a conversation, being careful to speak softly the entire time.

“I’m glad you’re alive,” Slade said.

Miss Bonnie looked at Slade for a second, then turned back to the zombies. “You too.”

“I looked for you,” Slade said.

“Not for long I reckon,” Miss Bonnie said.

“The place was blown to bits,” Slade said. “Goddamn dead people on fire were trying to eat me…”

“Don’t worry about it,” Miss Bonnie said. “You had to get back to your wife.”

Silence.

“Congratulations,” Miss Bonnie added.

“It didn’t happen,” Slade said.

Miss Bonnie gawked at Slade. “What?”

“Jack and his boys busted the whole thing up,” Slade said. “There was a gunfight…they turned into zombies…”

“Jesus,” Miss Bonnie said.

Slade reached down and grabbed Miss Bonnie’s hand. “Maybe all of this means that you and I should…”

Miss Bonnie wrenched her hand free. “You horse’s ass!”

Slade didn’t have to ask “What?” His dumbfounded face did it for him.

“You were too yellow to tell Sarah about us before when everything was fine but you want to break her heart now that there’s a bunch of dead people trying to eat us alive?” Miss Bonnie asked.

“I…but you said you wouldn’t even if I asked you,” Slade said. “And I asked you…”

“And I still won’t, ya’ big dummy,” Miss Bonnie said. She glanced quickly at Sarah, who was too busy in her own sorrow to notice anything. “Get your ass back over there and comfort her!”

“But…”

“Nothing’s changed,” Miss Bonnie said. “Now scoot.”

“Women,” Slade muttered. He stopped by the table again. Doc was in a cold sweat. Annabelle was gently massaging his temples.

The Reverend was boozing it up and Miles was still trying to refresh his own memory.

“I told you how to kill vampires?” Miles asked.

“Yup,” Gunther replied.

“Werewolves?”

“Yup.”

“Zombies?”

“Yup.”

“Huh,” Miles said. “What was it?”

“Don’t hurt yourself son,” Gunther said. “It’ll come to you.”

Slade walked on. He passed by Townsend, who was holding a private vigil over Blake’s head and technically the rest of his body as well, even though it was still pinned underneath a werewolf corpse.

“You two were close?” Slade asked.

“Yeah,” Townsend said. “Best pals since we were kids.”

“Sorry,” Slade said.

“I remember the first time we played stickball…”

Townsend told the story for an entire minute before realizing that Slade had already walked away.

Slade was Slade.

The ex-marshall took a seat in the pew next to Sarah. He put an arm around his bride. She held her groom close, burying the side of her face up against his chest.

Together they sat for awhile until finally, Sarah spoke.

“You must think me very foolish.”

“No,” Slade said.

“I’m simply not made to handle something like this,” Sarah said.

“I don’t know anyone was made to handle something like this,” Slade said.

Thump! Everyone turned as Miles slapped his hand on the table.

“Now I remember!” the boy said as he stood up. “Don’t let a zombie bite….”

“ARRRRRGGGGHHHH!!!!”

Now everyone’s attention was on Townsend, who was screaming out in pain.

Miles gulped.

“…you.”